AIBU to expect neighbours to stop building work by 6pm?

[Pinkroom]

We are in a terraced house. Neighbours are doing a some building work. They have shown us the plans and have building control approval, there will be some contractors but they are also doing a lot of parts of it themselves (they are in the trade) due to this there will be work on evenings and weekends. We have said can they let us know when they will be doing work and being considerate as our children go to bed between 6-6.30pm. They have said they will let us know when any major parts of the works start, but they won't be messaging us every time they do any work in an evening or weekend as they will be doing work at any available opportunity after work etc.
I think they should be considerate and stop working by 6pm as we have young children. They said that is too early and if they don't get back from work until then how will they ever finish the project, they did say they would be considerate and not work late maybe until 7/7.30.
Who is being unreasonable here?

That would apply to builders not diy

Hmm, check with your local council. I think they’re likely to be pushing it with evening building noise, esp. noisy activities like drilling and sawing. 6 pm may be the cut-off in your area. 7-7:30 isn’t too bad though if it gets the project completed quickly.

I live in a terrace and we’ve all had work down at various times, but we try to limit really noisy jobs to daytime hours with the odd exception.

My DC were always in bed by 6.30pm. I thought that was normal.

6:30 is not late for ‘noise’. Many people don’t even get home til then. Are they supposed to just not do anything after work? 7:30/8 is fair compromise.

It does sound very early.

I clicked on the thread to see where they found builders who will work past 3 pm, but was disappointed to see they were doing the work themselves.

Has everyone forgotten the stress and misery of bedtime and sleep deprivation when you have young kids?? My god, cut this woman some slack!

Anyway, op. My child went to bed between 6.30 and 7pm when he was little. I'd be feeling positively murderous to have to put up with building work next door at that point in my life, but to be honest, I think if they've agreed to 7 - 7.30pm, I'd be inclined to think that was reasonable.

I think 7pm is a reasonable time to stop. Though personally I've never seen a bricky bother working past 4. I feel your pain, but don't be precious about this. It's a world we all have to live in.

Never in my children’s lives have I been able to achieve a bedtime earlier than about 7.30 pm. Not as babies or toddlers as they napped. Not after nursery as it didn’t end til 6. Not once they were at school as they were then too old for 6.30 bed time.

They’re 17 and 12 now so I might have missed the boat

I think you are being unreasonable and they are being very reasonable in agreeing to stop at 7.30pm. I would try some white noise for your kids as a previous poster suggested

I don’t think those rules apply to DIY. DIY would be covered by general noise rules which wouldn’t be in place at 6pm.

Thanks for responses this is actually a reverse and we are the ones doing the work but wanted to see what the general view was!
Met with neighbours recently to discuss and have been slightly fuming ever since and now feel we are treading on eggshells in our own house. I obviously don't want to fall out with them but I do feel they are being unreasonable. They say they have children (6&7 so not babies) who need sleep but I also have 2 teenagers who need their own rooms hence the loft conversion so we both have our own priorities. I feel slightly better now knowing we are not being unreasonable but we will never finish this if we cannot work any evenings.

Really? They have 6&7 yr olds and they’re claiming they go to bed at 6pm, and one of them was disturbed while trying to nap?

I think they’re lying. They just don’t like a bit of noise and are saying it’s the children.

You are definitely not being unreasonable OP. 6.30pm is really early for 6/7 year olds. I was expecting them to be 3/4 and even at that I never remember my kids going to bed that early

@Pinkroom Ah! As a fellow terrace dweller, the one noise that I’d try to avoid in the evenings is drilling. Our neighbors redid their basement last year and it was challenging to WFH when the drill was going, even with headphones on!

If you have to drill, do it as early as you can.

What does your council website say? We are renovating too and and strictly adhere to the regulations. These are ours

We strongly recommend that noisy building and DIY work be restricted to the following times unless you have agreed to other times with your neighbours:

8am to 6pm Monday to Friday
9am to 1pm Saturdays
no work on Sundays and Bank/Public Holidays:
It is a good idea to inform your neighbours of the work you're carrying out, and how long you expect it to take. Where possible, inform them in advance of potentially noisy work. Complaints may be avoided if people are aware of your timetable.

Remember, whilst occasional DIY or building work is not unreasonable, frequent, or prolonged loud work that causes disturbance can be considered unreasonable and may constitute a statutory nuisance.

I think you're being a bit unreasonable. 6pm is really early and although I can see how you would love to have peace and quiet all evening (no one relishes neighbours noise!) 7.30pm is a fair compromise because they do need time to get home from work and then have an hour to try and get something done or the work will take forever.
I do feel for you though. You have all the noise and inconvenience of the work, but none of the lovely pay off at the end.
Hopefully it will go smoothly and it won't be very noisy for very long.

We will be as considerate as possible, we would absolutely not do any very loud work after 8pm latest. But I thought 7 was a good compromise.
Those who have said earlier times, how does anyone who works full time do anything to their house? I don't think they are keen on us doing work at weekends either!
It's not something we can book annual leave for it's a large project. Also self employed so wouldn't get paid!
We have always been considerate towards them and messaged if we were having people over etc in advance (rare occasions) and we have never complained when their kids were young and screaming all night (or all day when I was trying to sleep after night shifts) because that's part of life living in a terraced house.

Wow those really are early bed times for 6 and 7. Like I’ve never heard of a school child going to bed before 7pm. And the parents who can get them to bed at 7 are seriously lucky.

I thought they must be toddlers who’d just dropped their nap or something.

Our council is the same, but this is not constant work. It won't be every single evening and weekends, but where we can we will have too to get it finished. The hours mentioned above we are generally at work so going off that would never be able to do any DIY!

Oh! I missed the reverse bit @Pinkroom
Okay, well then I think they are being a bit unreasonable and your compromise is fair, maybe you could also only do noisy work on Saturday and give all of you a rest of the loud stuff (hammering, drilling etc) on Sundays, but overall do try to remember that you're getting something at the end of the disturbance. They're not. For them it's just a noisy nuisance with no lovely loft room at the end.

I hope it all goes well and your teens love their new room.

DIY after 6/7 yes but not drilling etc and major works I think you need to stick to council rules.

But 6 year olds don’t go to bed at 6pm or nap!

I think up to 8pm is reasonable. Can you maybe do it every second night, so the neighbours get a break? Or choose 3/4 nights a week and let the neighbours know the nights and when it will stop, how long the works are expected to last? At least then they know what to expect. That can make it easier.

Yeah we are using annual leave to do ours. Luckily one neighbour has told us she is deaf and the one we are joined to said do what you need to do we are just glad your not getting builders in!

I agree with others that 6 &7 year olds don’t really go to bed at 6/6:30, I assumed they were babies/toddlers!

Just encourage your children to be plenty noisy in the garden first thing in the morning

Some people are so selfish and unneighbourly. I'd like to see more rules around intrusive noise