Is it socially acceptable to describe someone as a bit weird?

[ThejoyofNC]

Having a discussion with a friend. Is it socially acceptable to say something like "he's a bit weird" these days?

YANBU- yes
YABU- no

As I stated before context and tone matters :)

I think it's an awful stigma if people have repeatedly been described as weird especially if when young/growing up. Weird basically means 'not one of us' and that brings feelings of not fitting in, not being acceptable to society at large. So in a private conversation outside the context of a group situation eg one friend saying to another friend 'my boss is a bit weird' - fine. But one group member (whether work, social, sporting etc) saying to another group member 'so and so is a bit weird' is not nice at all and may be the start of exclusion and even bullying of that person.

True - I've just never, ever heard it to be complimentary - It always sounds slightly judgemental and unkind.

Yes, autistic people would mostly be ostracised. Great.

🤨

Weird as in unusual and you want to know more

There's not nearly enough people who fit this description for me. The majority of people, on the surface at least, are dull, dull, dull. I think folk are scared of being seen as weird.

I have no qualms about describing someone as weird or strange if that's how I find them. It doesn't always mean I dislike them.

@faerylights because you somehow managed to be insulted by something that I never meant as an insult. Just kinda the opposite to weird. Zero need for you to make a fuss about every word a person happens to use.

What's wrong with "interesting"? That's the opposite of "dull".

I’m not insulted

I just don’t see how boring can be anything but an insult (veiled or otherwise).

Just because someone doesn’t agree with you, or doesn’t understand you, doesn’t mean they’re insulted.

I was poised over the agree button until you suggested jealousy.

It's such an unproven theory that gets trotted out for all unpleasant social behaviour, especially on MN.

I'm not saying it's never accurate, but in this case the normals really find lots of things weird because they're very narrow minded, not jealous.

Weird, odd, quirky, creepy, eccentric - are all good descriptions but with nuanced differences.

Eh? I love interesting, but that wasn't in the bit I quoted.

Are you asking about when people use the word "interesting 🤨" as a euphemism for weird?

In our neurodivergent household, “bit weird” is fairly normal. I wouldn’t be offended by it at all.

But would you be offended if someone called your children weird and used that as a reason to ostracise them or upset them?

I think calling yourself weird or odd is one thing, but it shouldn’t be normalised to call other people weird as it’s too easy for it to be used unkindly.

I’m weird and I couldn’t care less

No, I meant when describing someone out of the ordinary about whom one might want to know more.
They're interesting, surely. Not weird.

Sure. I said there's not enough "Weird as in unusual and you want to know more" people. I like them 😀

personally it could be lifesaving if the weirdness is that creepy could be a serial killer, thief, drug dealer, liar type.
I consider it polite and an act of public service to friends or family if people give me weird vibes.

Yes that's how I see it.
It's a form of " othering" Stigmatising someone for not been one of the crowd.
Opening the pathway towards exclusion and persecution.

I’m fed up of people not understanding the issues around judgement of another person and conflating it with the kind of daily judgements a person makes.

Judgement based on proper information and facts is absolutely fine.

Judgement when it’s opinion based on a very shallow level of information, combined with an air of superiority is not fine and not something most people do on a daily basis.

E.g person weaves about in the street and looks very unsteady:

Judgement : That person looks like they might be drunk, I’ll keep an eye in case they run in traffic = that’s fine
Judgement: Look at that drunk idiot, I can’t believe someone would be drunk at this time of day, they must be an alcoholic, I’ll avoid them like the plague = not ok.

I've been called weird for years. It does depend on tone and context how its meant.
I'm all kinds of weird - most comments go over my head these days.

I’ve started avoiding this just in case! I usually go for ‘he’s his own man’ or ‘ he knows his own mind’ in these situations😂obviously also works she or they so every one is covered 🤞

Yeah quirky and eccentric would be seen as more positive descriptors, creepy definitely negative, and weird and odd can go either way. I like eccentric though, there's someone at my work who is definitely eccentric.

@faerylights “Just because someone doesn’t agree with you, or doesn’t understand you, doesn’t mean they’re insulted”
Equally just because someone doesn’t say something the way you would choose to it doesn’t mean you need to nit pick and be tiresome. It’s boring…….

@WongKarWai @Callmebubblesdarlingeverybodydoes I sometimes describe myself as fat , on a bad day, but I would find it deeply offensive if someone else was to call me that behind my back or to my face.

I'm happy to call myself weird because there's no denying it but I f**king despise others saying it about me in bad faith.

I couldn't find the right words to voice this, but you and @Owly11 said it perfectly.
It's the deep feeling that I would have been burnt at the stake or drowned or put in a camp or any kind of institution in a bad accident of birth.