How the fuck am I supposed to relocate when these are the 'rules'?

[PissedOffAndStuck]

TL:DR

I want to relocate 200+miles away. I can't get a mortgage in principle because I won't have a job initially due to the distance; I can't get a job because I can't commute 200 miles each way to work!

Help!!!

Wanting to relocate from South Coast to North Yorkshire. Have a good amount of equity but want to reduce outgoings. Would still need a small mortage to buy new place (approx 15% LTV). After current home is sold and all expenses paid would be debt free with a contingency fund of approx £10k.

My current mortgage provider won't talk to me about anything because 'we can't offer advice' but you need a job for any of our products including porting your mortgage.

Mortgage providers in general want proof of regular income which given that I'm moving over 200 miles I can't provide.

Looked into shared ownership - 75% share purchased outright and £146 per month rent with option to staircase to 100% one I'm settled and get a job and can get a mortgage...computer says no...they also assess on monthly income.

How TF do people relocate? I'm looking for remote working jobs but ones that would suit me are few and far between and presumably one of the finance jobsworths is going to want umpteen payslips in triplicate before agreeing anything.

I've waited so long to make this move and my current lifestyle is absolutely killing me.

Can anyone suggest a way I can make it work? I might be able to scrape together enough to buy something without a mortgage but it would be tight.

@DeathNote11 thanks for this sensible suggestion - definitely something I'd consider.

On the address point, they don't care. I am relocating with a remote job currently. They don't know the job is remote, the addresses are 90 miles apart. There are zero questions. All they care about is affordability.
However, they do ask on application whether you expect your earnings to change in the next three years and they do state in their offer that they have the right to refuse mortgage post offer and before completion if your earnings change.

So no, nobody in the bank is going to look at your addresses and put two and two together. They don't care.
Yes, they can technically pull out before completion if additional pre-completion checks reveal anything fishy. However, again, I think they just run another credit report and nothing else. Your job does not feature on credit reports.

The current job market is crud. You're being very naive on several points

I am taking specifically about what the lender checks. My payslip does not say "works remotely". It says this person is based in an NHS trust which is over 100 miles away from where they are buying a house. And nobody called me from the bank to ask how I am getting work.

The OP is also currently in employment..
Read the thread, have some coffee. Might help

You rent for a while to ensure that the new job and new area are a good fit for you.

This

Also a lot of jobs have a 3 month notice. So lots of people would apply, get a job, accept it for a start date 3 months later, then hand in notice on current job, then would arrange accomodation for when they started the new job. They'd typically rent their current house out for a short period and rent near the new job, then once past a probation period, would look to sell old house & get a new one

I completely agree which is why I gave an example of what I did last month when applying for mortgage and nobody asked me why my employer is 100 miles away from my new home address. Getting a mortgage offer in these circumstances is perfectly viable as they don't ask for practicalities.
Actually completing on a mortgage is another matter. But, by that point everything may change again and OP might have a job lined up. Again, banks don't really care that it's a different job. They just care about your salary.
So it might be wise to find a property, get an offer and then sort the rest out. Even if OP finds a house today, it will still be months before it's ready for completion.

Mortgage companies have really tightened up. They make you jump through hoops. I have moved cross country on my own and my DS has also done it with his partner.
You have no option but to find a job first, then rent, then buy a home.
Its very difficult and a load of hassle mortgage companies will not be interested until you have been in that job and passed probation.

Could you buy outright if you're only taking out such a small mortgage. Leave yourself with no money, claim benefits till you get a job?

People are gonna jump on me for using benefits but the system is there to support and it'd only be for a short time. Or get a lodger for a short period

I imagine the good folk of north yorkshire trying to get on the housing ladder are delighted by people in south selling up and coming there way.

Is there a reason why you have to buy a property to relocate? Rent something temporarily for 3-6 months, whatever is needed so you can get things done.

I think you will find that a lot of Yorkshire, including North Yorkshire is doing pretty well

Its around the same as the UK average

I have explained to my broker that I will be aiming to have either a remote job before I go, or something lined up to start within a very short time of arriving but there may be a small gap and I have contingency funds to cover that.

Aiming won’t butter any parsnips with mortgage brokers. You need a job.

We relocated 150 miles but 10 years ago. It wasn't an issue.
They didn't ask what I was going to do with my job just wanted 3 months bank statements to prove income and only asked if we were planning on having kids e.g me going on maternity leave. Noone raised that I would need to get a new job when we relocated.