To ask for your help with my life?

[Lostinterior]

I’m 20 and feeling really torn about my future, and I’d really appreciate some honest perspective.

For context, I was made homeless at 17 so I had to grow up very quickly. I now live with my boyfriend on a large property (we don’t live with the owners, we’re in a tiny property on the land). I run my own dog walking/pet care business and earn about £1,300 a month, including £800 from the main clients whose property we live on (rent free). I’m also studying Forensic Psychology with the Open University.

On paper, I’m stable and doing well. But I feel constantly stressed and “on.” My days are wake up, rush to work, manage clients, come home exhausted, stress about the housework, sleep, repeat. I feel strung out and worry I’m wasting my youth.

Long term, I want financial freedom, a nice home, dogs, a family, travel, respect, stability and peace. I enjoy my degree and like that it’s respected, but I don’t think I actually want to become a forensic psychologist, it’s a long, competitive and uncertain path.

What I’m really drawn to is interior design. I love photography, refurbishing and selling vintage antiques, and the idea of creating beautiful spaces. I’d also eventually love to run a dog grooming studio from home once we own a house.

My problem is I have no idea how to realistically move into interior design without blowing up the stability I’ve built. I can do a qualification alongside my degree, but how do you actually get real work or clients when you’re starting from scratch? Especially when I don’t want to lose my current main client (the £800/month one) and the housing that comes with it.

My boyfriend and I would also love to travel by campervan for a year after I finish my degree, before settling down. But I’m scared about how we’d earn money while travelling and what we’d do when we came back to the UK. The thought of coming back with no clear path really worries me.

Part of me thinks we should stay put for a couple of years, save hard, I finish my degree, start an interior design qualification, maybe train in dog grooming, build some kind of portfolio quietly, and then travel once we have a solid financial buffer and plan. But I worry I’m being too cautious and missing out.

Has anyone successfully transitioned into interior design laterally while keeping another job? How did you get your first proper projects? And has anyone done a planned “build first, travel later” approach in their early 20s?

I’d really value honest advice – I feel very aware of security because of my past, but I don’t want fear to run my life either.

This i know so many people who studied this not one of them work in the field. The same with interior design how realistic is that. Op you sound like most teens early 20 year olds you have all these big ideas but haven't put a significant amount of thought into them. You need to figure out what you want most and focus on that is it travelling, working, studying, buying a house.

So, you've already accrued a student loan that you'll have to repay, so giving it up now wouldn't be the best idea unless you've only just started. It might make more sense to broaden your forensic psychology to a broader BPS psychology degree if that is an option. Contrary to some of the feedback here, an OU psychology degree is a valuable qualification. I know, mine was the basis of a long career (in another branch of psychology). A good honours degree could open doors in a whole range of areas, not just in psychology.

Interior design sounds like an attractive career but the likely reality is that it's not an easy option and not necessarily very lucrative. 20 is very young and you have lots of options at your stage of life, many of which take time and application. It's easier to gain qualifications before you have long term commitments (such as children and a mortgage).

I agree - I did my degree later in life and actually did a subject I really wanted to do that is in line with the job. You only get 1 lot of student loan, so I wouldn't waste it on something that you just find interesting if you won't use it at your age.

Personally I would consider asking if you can do some interior stuff where you are and take pictures. Use it as your portfolio and work with the owner to their requirements (don't do anything structural).

If that isn't possible I would travel and sign up with temp agencies along the way. Dog grooming is portable and part time work is relatively easy to get in Australia compared to UK I found, if you sign up with agencies. Personally I would travel while you're young and with the lad you live with (it sounds stable so if you stay it might become marriage and babies before you know it!). Travel with him and it will bond you together as well as making you aware of each other's daily needs/how to show up for each other in tough situations and be fond memories for the long nights when you are up every hour feeding babies if that is the plan.

OP, my two cents - you’re still young and there is plenty of time to make decisions about the direction you want to take your life. You’ve clearly got your head screwed on and I really do think you can stop worrying about ‘wasting your youth’ because you’re getting heaps of experience which is all part of navigating adulthood.
Becoming an interior designer/dog groomer/business owner doesn’t have an age limit. Of course, in industries where there’s lots of competition, the younger you start the more chance you give yourself to get there - but I don’t think you need to pin your worries on that at 20. I didn’t truly ‘find’ my career until 30 and now at 33 I’m in a Senior Management role and loving it so you’ve got time.
Finish your degree - you won’t regret having a qualification behind you. My degree isn’t remotely related to my job but I still loved it and it’s a hobby now.

If I were you I’d knuckle down, get your work done and save hard until you graduate. Keep your savings separate but work with your boyfriend on a common goal - do you want to each save 50% of a house deposit plus a certain amount to travel, to keep each other accountable to savings goals? That might set you up well for future housing considerations, and also give you a reasonable idea of whether travel is feasible, or whether you need to keep saving for another year to give a safety net. I think you’re right to be mindful of medium-term financial security, but all you need in that regard is some proper planning (open a LISA and start paying in if you haven’t already!)
Lastly, you said earlier in the thread that you ‘probably can’t change’ the fact you stress - you absolutely can. Have a chat with a mental health practitioner, have a look into CBT, think about equipping yourself to deal healthily with stress. You’ve had a lot of growing up to do in a short amount of time but you’re doing great. Don’t doubt yourself 🙂

I think you should carry on and obtain your degree. But can you ask your tutor for support in organising your studies and your future plans? You sound amazing by the way - I can’t imagine achieving so much at your age! But if you can find a way to be less stressed this will improve your life at the present.

What do you value more - a carefree youth or obtaining your ideal life by, say, 30/35? In a perfect world we could have both, and I'm sure many people do - perhaps you will! But I certainly didn't. I suspect having both requires specific sets of circumstance depending on the cards you're dealt and what it is you want out of life. Not to discredit those who spent their twenties collecting experiences while enjoying a flourishing career, but I don't think it's common.

Decide what you want, who you are, what you're willing to sacrifice and what you absolutely won't compromise on. Life won't follow your exact timelines, but it will fall into place. Good luck - oh, to be 20 again! 😊

It sounds like you are doing brilliantly! I would finish the degree if you enjoy it and you're already a year or two in - you may not pursue a career in that field, but a degree is useful to have under your belt in just in case and you'll have the sense of accomplishment. In terms of career, I don't know much about either dog grooming or interior design, but my instinct would be to choose something that involves a practical skill that can't easily be replaced by AI. Other people have pointed out that many creative professions are being rapidly changed by AI, so something like dog walking/grooming may be a better option, with interior design as an enjoyable hobby/sideline. I am twice your age, working in a not particularly well paid role that I can see being easily replaced by AI and I'm terrified; I have no other skills to fall back on, and if I do lose my job, have no idea how I'd survive, given the current job market. If I could go back in time, I would without doubt have chosen a more practical profession/trade that would have given me the option of self-employment but hindsight is a fine thing. In terms of travel, you are still so young and have loads of time to do that. Good luck with whatever you do!

Why not just focus on now, I have barely given a thought to my future ever and I'm 34 now. What can you do to feel calmer now? This stood out to me "stress about the housework" - you said you live in a tiny property, and no kids, so I cannot see what is stressful. Surely you can clean the whole place in an hour, we can clean our 3 bed house in a couple of hours. Maybe adjust your standards, as long as it's hygienic it really doesn't matter. Finish your degree seeing as you've started, and keep your business going. I'd personally say that AI is going to replace a lot of interior designers in the near future so why not keep it as a hobby / interest rather than a potential job. We did a year travelling when I was 27, husband was 30, we went and worked in Australia on working holiday visas, saved up and spent all the money going travelling, so was a cost neutral year!

Definitely finish your degree as that gives you more options.

Friends who have moved into interior design generally did it with support from a high earning partner and began building their portfolio by giving away free advice. It's a very hard industry to actually make money in and AI is only going to make it worse. Dog walking and grooming seem a much better bet and keep the interior design as a hobby for now.

ive heard that interior design is incredibly hard to make a living from. A friend qualified and had to go back to banking because people simply aren’t interested in paying enough to make it viable. Dog grooming may well be sustainable

My honest advice is re-think.

Interior design is a shrinking industry due to the use of AI. The people who will use interior designers in the future will be a very few, very high ultra net worth people, and some businesses. The people who will get these jobs will be people who already walk the corridors of power in these worlds - think the daughters and wives of the wealthy and powerful. Interior design is not a hugely meritocratic world anyway (it's a lot about connections) and will become even more so.

I say this to save you future heartache.

I would agree with others that the degree isn’t really impressive if you’re not going to use it, and as an employer I’d query why you put 3 years into something for seemingly no point, it certainly wouldn’t sway me to hire you if it was entirely irrelevant to a job you were applying for. So on that note I’d really think about why you want to do it, if it’s just to say you’ve done it then okay but that’s a very expensive path with no actual end goal that is going to benefit you.

One of my friends is an interior designer and did a 3 year degree and then did a course with British Institute of Interior Design, even with both of those things it was a really competitive field for her to get into and you’d be going up against people who actually do have the relevant qualifications. She had to build a portfolio and to do that she ultimately worked for free for quite awhile, redesigning her own home, she did some rooms for friends and family for free, she did some work in one of the local cafe’s and community centre for free for example all to build a portfolio alongside working in a shop to pay her bills, she spent a lot before she ever made a penny and even her first paid job in the area was with Wren Kitchens as a designer there and wasn’t really what she wanted to do but was another stepping stone. She loves it and is now really successful and sought after but it has taken her basically 6/7 years to get to that point and she had been competing every step of the way.

I was a dog groomer for many years before I quit last year. Its back breaking, underpaid and stressful as hell work and you are not going to get rich from it believe me!
Id

If you were my daughter I’d be very proud of you and give you the following advice:

1. Finish your degree
2. Keep working and saving until you graduate
3. Treat interior design as an interest and continue to enjoy learning about it
4. Everything else goes on the back burner until you graduate.
5. Every time you feel stressed remind yourself of your priorities and that everything else is on the back burner
6. After graduation reassess your interests and opportunities

You don’t have to decide everything today, you are in a good place, keep at it.

OU is hard work, but in your shoes I’d complete the degree and then think about what you want in the future.

Agreed.

My impression of interior design is that it's packed full of wealthy women (mainly) who like the idea of the job but also don't actually need to make any money.

Dog kennels / grooming / walking would be a much safer bet IMO.

Why are you stressing about housework?

You’ve had a disrupted youth, so I imagine that makes you a bit more anxious about stuff.

For interior design, I would start with the antiques refurbishing and photography side of things- stuff you can do in your spare time and build a brand/reputation. And offer to style friends’ houses for free, so you can post them on your insta or whatever. you can do all this while earning money with your other interest, the animals. Sounds like you have lots of strings to your bow! Personally, I think interior design knowledge is just a few tips and tricks followed by lots of experience working with builders, upholsterers and decorators. So you could maybe find a job or apprenticeship in a firm. But if you want to set up on your own without doing that, I don’t think there’s a certain qualification customers will look for. (Perhaps business customers do, I don’t know.) I did a two-day course once. Maybe you could do something similar to have a certificate to put on your website. Equally, doing all the above would make you a credible candidate for the right kind of job.

As far as the timing for travelling is concerned, you are very young! Many of your peers are still full-time students. I feel like you’re ahead of them in the maturity stakes. Anyway, personally I would travel first rather than disrupt the establishment of your career. You could think about the interior design when you’re on your travels - maybe you could bring back influences or supplier knowledge.

Read the rest of the thread and considered it a bit more and also think you should finish the degree. Loads of people do degrees in things they don't use but also I did a quick google and if you are considering Australia they offer visas for Forensic Science jobs, so might be worth looking at that option too if your partner can also use his skills.

Hi op! I have two daughters around about your age. Your twenties are for discovering the sort of life you want to live. So don’t get stressed about this! You have time and youth on your side so take a breath! You’ve also done really well to set up your own business so young.

My first piece of advice would be to not follow your passion but do what you are good at!

Many of us want to be artists and designers but whether we have the ability is another question. Don’t get me wrong; if you are talented you should go for it! But realise that financial success in any sort of design or creative arena is as much about organisation, marketing, self-promoting, accounting, logistics, and good time management and hard work as any other profession. You must know that already running your own business!

You don’t need to follow forensic science and I have little idea of the jobs you can do outside of police related roles, but it would show resilience to get one degree under your built and finish it. It is proof to others, should you need to be employed one day, that you can assimilate information, and that you stick to something, even when you realised it wasn’t for you!

I don’t suppose you would want to join the police and become a dog handler? I think there is a way of joining via a graduate route? And then develop a dog training business on the side?

Aside from that, in your shoes, I would focus on the dog side of things. It sounds you live in such a unique location, it would be a shame not to profit from it, and there is huge demand for dog walking, pet sitting, training, grooming and as you know, people are willing to pay quite a lot for these services. Given time you could expand to doing dog photography? And take some courses aligned with that? And then start taking photos of dogs in their owners’ homes and get in to interiors that way? Creating sets if you like?

And go on some great holidays and travel and see the world! Go at times when you are not needed for pet sitting eg February and travel to Australia for example.

When you say you are stressed, I know that working and studying is a hard combination, but trust me, you have a lot more in you! I discovered that once I had dc.

How are your time management skills? Have a look at Mel Robbins interview with Laura Vanderkam, who breaks down the 168 hrs we have a week! If you subtract 40 hrs work from that plus 56 hours sleep, you have 72 hours left for other things. Even if you subtract an hour a day for washing, hair and make up, and say one hour’s cleaning per day a week to include laundry, that equals 58 hrs left over. If you take eight hours away for leisure that’s fifty hours free! Even if you take away 8 hrs per week for meals and washing up that’s still 42 hrs a week left! Two hours a week away for food shopping and you have forty hours free!

I think you are feeling tired because you have all of these options going through your head and you are not quite sure where your life is going! The uncertainty and stress of that is draining your battery.

Good luck making some decisions op! The last piece of advice is, most decisions are not definitively right or wrong! There is more than one way to skin a cat! And you already have made a great start by doing and creating your own little business that can lead you to a number of different areas involving creativity. For example, if you are dedicated and work hard, a small business can develop organically like this:

>dog training, grooming, walking and pet sitting

>dog photography,

-dog and owner portraits in their homes

>designing sets for photographing owners and dogs at weddings or at special events

> you create your own dog beds and blankets which you use in your photos, people ask you where you bought them, you create a sideline

>sideline leads to designing dog friendly utility rooms and gardens

OK so that all sounds a bit fantastical but you see the point I am saying, you can use your skills to focus on a number of things and be ready to pounce on any opportunity that come your way!

Another scenario could be;

> forensic science degree
> join police
> join dog handling unit of police
> set up dog training business on side
>retire from police and train dogs for search and rescue!

Definitely finish your degree. It will be done in the blink of an eye and then you will have that as ballast.

It sounds like you’ve been through a lot. You sound like a very resilient, intelligent young person and you should be very proud of yourself!

If you're interested in photography you have the perfect 'in' to make money from it from your dog business - take your camera on walks and get professional grade photos of the dogs having fun and sell downloads for £5 a go. Or if you move into grooming - "Get your pup groomed then have its own professional photo shoot...". From there you could follow up with family portrait offers once people see great photos of their pets. Reinvest the money into upgrading equipment and taking trips for yourself to go an photography the things you really want to see.

An NC or equivalent qualification in photography would give you all the necessary skills to start out. Great second hand equipment can be had for good prices on ebay etc. I'm a pro wedding photographer and about 75% of my entire kit came from ebay!

When I went to uni, I knew of many many people doing forensic psychology (as well as forensic science) but the reality is that there really aren’t that many jobs in that role and the jobs that are usually require at least a master’s or phd! Saying that, it’s still best to finish the degree as many jobs just require a degree qualification even if it’s not particularly relevant.

interior design…. Due to the internet and AI tools most people would/can design their homes themselves. Unless you live in a wealthy area I’m not sure how many jobs you’d get?

police….. soooo many people want to work in dog handling and again, not many jobs (exh is a copper)

saying that, don’t pick a career just because it has good prospects. I’m very arty but ended up being a biomedical scientist in clinical chemistry 😂 made a shit tonne of money but absolutely hated it. I’ve always had a side hussle of doing up furniture to sell to get my creative fix

Interior designers tend to run in well off circles that can afford to hire interior designers. You could work to get your house first, interior design that (to experience the realities!), maybe start a blog about interior design to document what you do, share ideas, get your name out there and make contacts.

I'd reconsider interior design on its own as a career to generate a regular income.

it's one of the jobs that often comes up in lists of jobs vulnerable to AI. Along with graphic design, media, photographic web marketing. A lot of people are doing things like that for themselves using AI, that they would previously have given to an agency.

the latest thinking is to develop a T Shaped career, in other words, develop a deep specialism but also a broader range of compatible skills such as project management, risk management, business analysis to give yourself a unique combination of applicable practical skills

I'd go the dog grooming route on a mobile basis ... much less hassle for owners.