To support DH in changing his career

[Unsureaboutitall]

DH has been made redundant 2 weeks ago. He has been given a package that is more or less the equivalent of 3 months salary but obv tax free so this can technically cover us for around 5 months before we start dipping into our savings.

He has been wanting to change career for a really long time but it isn’t easy (despite the fact that he went to study for the right qualifications) as he is in his late 40s, has unrelated work experience to what he wants to do and new industry isn’t exactly a very easy market to get into – but it is what he is interested in and would love to do, potentially also on a freelance basis. He has never been happy doing what he was doing before and he sees this as an opportunity to finally have time to fully focus on a new career and see whether that’s viable or not. So, essentially, he is not sure he wants to start re-applying for jobs within the same sector he has worked in all his life, at least not yet, to give the other project a go first.

I want him to be happy and part of me thinks this is an opportunity for him to really try as he wouldn’t otherwise ever have the time and the energy to do it. But part of me also thinks we have a big mortgage and a child and the idea of not trying hard to secure a second income asap makes me nervous.

My salary is enough to cover mortgage, bills, food and transportation expenses but anything beyond that (for example DS’s clubs and activities and any other non-essential or sudden expense would need to come from our savings). We don’t have a big savings pot as we have bought our first home last summer so almost everything we had went into our deposit and home improvements (we had to fix the roof and other things) and we were slowly trying to rebuild that.

DH fully understands this is a big deal and he is not going into this lightly. He is still keeping an eye on jobs within his industry that spark his interest but would prefer to take some time before jumping into the next role that will make him unhappy again. He is a hard worker and I know he would take any job if he needed to, eventually – I’d just rather this didn’t happen tbh!

So can you live, albeit frugally, on your salary alone?

I'd be giving him a chance, see if he can get work experience in the new industry he's looking at.

If after a couple of months then he needs to start looking for any suitable job whether in the new industry or not

If the situation was reversed, would he support you?

@randomchap Yes, I have no doubt that he would support me.
DH is more optimistic than me, I am a bit more of a pessimist so I guess our outlook on these things is a bit different.

And re the salary question, we can live mainly on my salary, yes, but some expenses will need to be covered by our savings (once the redundancy pay has been used)

It's a really tricky one, especially not knowing what role he wants to move to. (I'm not asking BTW 😀).

Reading your post reminded me of a friend's husband who had always wanted to do a highly trained and specialist role. He did the extremely expensive and lengthy training but could only get a freelance ish position part time and tops up as an evri driver. He's now in his late sixties doing that.

I know it impacted finances, marriage and family life. So I don't have a positive view of it but that obviously coloured by what I know.

Your situation may of course be very different. Wishing you the best.

My husband did this, although was in his mid 30s. Similar situation: made redundant and changed careers. It was a tough few years, living off my salary, and him studying for and taking professional exams, but it worked out OK in the end. He out earns me now, and has been much happier overall.

If you had more savings for an emergency cushion I would say go for it. But, without that cushion, adding in he has no working experience in the field he wants to get into, his age, and the fact that it's a hard field to hard to break into would have me saying this is not the time for a career switch. I also think on one income you're going to have to cut those non essentials like clubs.

Freelancing could also be really problematic. He's in his late 40s with no job experience in his new field. He's got to be realistic here.

If you can manage on just your wages and his redundancy money for a few months then I would let him try the new career that he wants but if after 5 months he’s not managed to find a job in the new career it sounds to me like he would be happy and willing to take any job if he needed to.

Conventional wisdom says it takes at least 5 years for a new venture like this to become successful. Can you support the family on your own salary for that long?

Yes he would but the point is that I don't want him to have to do that. As in there can also be a risk that he won't find a job within his current industry when the time comes and he will have to take literally anything just to have an income as we'd be running out of cash. Although this scenario is a few months away

I’m a freelancer, and have been doing this for 13 years, but I also worked full or part time in a salaried roles in a different industry while I was building my portfolio.

I'm not clear exactly why he needs to get into the new industry now. What has been the barrier to apply for jobs in the new industry when he was still employed? Does he need to do further training or unpaid work experience? Can it only be done as a freelancer? If so, I would give that a go assuming that it was short-term and had a high chance of resulting in employment, but with a very clear and mutually agreed deadline. If not, I would encourage him to get a 'proper' job again and develop the other stuff alongside. It would be safer to go back into his usual industry on a part-time basis and do the new work in parallel.

You need a high chance of success because you are potentially spending all your savings in making this happen.

Then tell him it’s just not feasible for him to be trying to get into a new career right now and that he needs to just get a job.

Can’t he try applying for both types of jobs and see if he gets offers in any in the new field?

Or if the new job is more causal/freelance then take, say, two months to really commit time and energy to it. Then apply for other jobs after that and at the same time get an idea for whether the new career path is panning out? He won’t get offered jobs immediately or have to accept immediately so it’s a middle ground.

Or if the new job needs qualifications and that’s the time committment, could he maybe find part time work in his current field to do it alongside retraining and then just quit if/when he is ready to pursue the new career path? That would top up your salary but also give him a chance

I'd agree but on the strict boundary of a timeline. If he hasn't found what he wants within 8 weeks, then he applies for anything and everything.

How much does he earn in his current profession? I’m asking to get a gauge on how high the bar is for the switch. If he needs to earn 150k the I guess that might be tough with no experience. If it’s 50k then I guess that’s more achievable.

Sorry I don’t know where I picked up that he’s be self employed. I would say he needs to get a job to pay the bills and he can keep his eyes open for another role in the meantime. When you have children your priority should be providing for them imo.

I believe this is probably the most likely scenario. I think he just wants to have time and headspace to try and apply for roles, tap into his network more for unpaid experience, see how things go. He didn't have the time to do this "properly" whilst working long hours and parenting DS.

Do the money saving expert money makeover to reduce your outgoings now. How is he going to spend the time- training? Can you explore options for him to earn cash part time while he tries to get the new career underway. And you need to agree a point in the timeline or financial red line when he needs to start looking for any job that will cover the bills.

He was earning £56K. We could be ok with half of that but would mean that we are not able to save, but if it was a sacrifice for a limited period for better career prospects or more job flexibility for him further down the line, I reckon it's doable.

It’s a bit of a now or never scenario

Can’t see a problem having a go but reducing outgoings now so that essentials and all stuff for child covered for as long as possible

and you get reassurance that if nothing has happened by X date he will need to get another job - any job and that might be a less fulfilling job and worse paid than within his current industry - and he does this without complaining or getting depressed - this is his gamble and it might not pay off

as long as you iron out all the possibilities and pitfalls beforehand

then why not?

could be the opportunity he needed

I don't think it is ever healthy to take a big pay cut unless you have to. I was sacked from a 75k job and now earn 55k.

I'm grateful to work, of course, but the grass isn't always greener.

Most jobs are just a variation on typing and dealing with people.

Better the devil you know.

What does he want to do?

Well I can't be too specific as I don't want to share details but in this case it will be two completely different industries, skills, types of people, working hours etc

Yes he sees it very much like a now or never scenario and I don't know if I want to be the one forcing him to think it's never if there is even the smallest chance he might be able to do it

Then I would be supportive, but them I am also a natural optimist!