Hi all, hoping for some balanced perspectives as my head is a bit all over the place.
I’m 44, DH is 45, and we have three boys aged 12, 10 and 7. I work in the civil service and DH works in finance/tech. He’s recently been offered a job in California. It would be a contract role rather than permanent, so if it didn’t work out we could move back to London fairly easily.
DH is American originally but also has British citizenship. We actually lived in the US before and moved back to London in 2019 after my dad had a stroke, as I wanted to be closer to my parents and siblings. Thankfully my dad has recovered well since then. If I’m honest, DH made a lot of sacrifices at that time. He left a good situation in the US without complaint because being near my family mattered to me, and he has always been very supportive of my career and choices. Part of me feels that this opportunity is something I would like to support him in now.
I don’t mind the idea of moving back to America. We previously lived in Los Gatos and still visit often as I have good friends there, and the boys absolutely love it, especially the weather. All three of our children were born in the States, so it wouldn’t feel completely unfamiliar to them. We’ve mentioned the possibility and they seem quite excited by the idea.
I’ve spoken to my parents and siblings about it. My parents are supportive and see it as a good opportunity for DH’s career, but my brothers and sisters think we’d be a bit mad to move to America right now. I do understand where they’re coming from and I’m not dismissing their concerns.
If I’m honest, part of me really misses the lifestyle and the sunshine. I’ve also been thinking about going back to study, and I would probably choose to do that in the US if we moved. On the other hand, I do worry we could be making a rash decision given the current political climate and whether it’s sensible to uproot everyone again.
So I suppose I’m asking, are we being unreasonable to seriously consider this? Has anyone made a similar move with children this age, or chosen to move abroad despite wider worries about politics and stability? Would really appreciate calm perspectives as I keep going round in circles.