Is it normal to post your kids accomplishments on WhatsApp group ?

[yoyopup]

I am in a WhatsApp group with a few of my year 1 DDs friends from school. There’s 5 mums of 5 girls that are friends. We organise events or play dates for the girls and have random chit chat. It’s not super active on the chit chat front.

anyway, recently the mums are increasingly posting pics of their DDs accomplishments - like drawing a cool picture or playing instruments. That kind of thing.

it’s always done in a ‘ wow look what my DD did, she’s so amazing ‘ way.

AIBU that this sort of thing shouldn’t really be shared in this thing and it’s getting a bit annoying ?

the only people who are going to be equally as proud as you of something your kid did, are maybe the grandparents or very close family/ very close friends.

Am I being weird ? I don’t feel like sharing these accomplishments with the group and it’s kind of annoying to receive them..

thoughts?

No. It's weird. I don't post my kids online. Send a few pics to family/friends.

Lovely they're so proud but school WhatsApp groups are annoying enough without this 😂

So these people are just school contacts and not friends? Then no I wouldn’t. I do have a WhatsApp group of mums I met through school (our kids are 22/23 now) and we still meet up regularly. So yes I’d post some big achievement on that like ‘hey X passed her driving test’! Or in younger years: ‘Y got a merit for Grade 4 piano’. But not if they were star of the week or something.

That’s weird
why are mums like this

(I’m a mum)

No that's for WhatsApp groups that only contain besotted Grandparents and various other family members not for parents WhatsApp groups. It's very boastful and not a good look.

I'm not in a group like that, but from why you said the group exists, it's exactly the sort of thing I would expect them to post. You're only connected through your kids, so you just have different expectations of what to put in the chat. Nobody is doing anything wrong.

but it is not a whole class chat, just your established friends....so what is wrong then

School mummy mafia WhatsApp group, the sooner it’s on silent the better, nothing good ever comes from them.

You said it’s 5 mums and 5 girls that are friends, so the group is just 5 of you? I wouldn’t see an issue with that. I have a few friendship groups and we share our children’s achievement, whether that’s being man of the match or staying in their own bed all night. It’s not every day but it’s nice to hear mice
things.

Other people just tend to believe you’re far more invested in their children than you actually are. I meet up semi-regularly with a group of old school friends for dinner. One member of the group (who was in our class but we weren’t friends with at school) has an only child who she is absolutely besotted with, and she talks about nothing else. He’s year 5. She recently presented us all with a framed photo of said child. I’ve never met this boy in my life, why on earth would I display a picture of him in my home? It’s batshit.

What’s normal for one group chat isn’t normal for another. It seems to have been established as “normal” for this one. What’s aggravating you about this? So what if they think their DD is amazing?

Honestly, the problem is that you are expecting WhatsApp to be different from other social media platforms because it's a private chat. It won't be because it's simply a more private form of social media. Once people 'share' they will share successes and accomplishments unless you specify that the chat is just for info and making arrangements. It's difficult to be the person that redefines the space as info only. So maybe just put up with it

I think this is very much an 'it depends' answer.

I am in lots of WhatsApp Groups, and they are for different 'purposes'.

This does sound as if it is a group of friends who have chosen to set up a WhatsApp group, rather than a 'Parents of everyone in the class / Team / Brownie Pack' type group for information giving. Generally friends are pleased to hear about those little things they have done in life that made them happy.

I'm not in any groups like that, just whole class or individual WhatsApp chats but one that has branched out like that I would expect is more like a group of friends, so I would expect that kind of chat. Like minded people in similar stages of life, similar to NCT friendship groups.

Weird, and tone deaf.
At my tennis club, a couple of pushy committee members posted club wide, their daughters hockey wins, super weird, lots of raised eyes.
Competitive parents are the very worst.

I wouldn’t like it. It’s being a show off in my view.

if it’s a kids drawing where they’ve accidentally drawn their daddy looking like a penis, great, I’d like to see! Sharing a drawing to show off their ‘gifted and talented’ artistic ability of a 6 year old would get an eye roll from me. It reminds me of Christmas cards with the letter exclaiming how wonderful the family has been this year. Just cringy.

Just do a "Aww, lovely!😍" and then get on with your day.

I love hearing about my friends childrens accomplishments. Its a shame that people see it as competitive parenting.

What's normal for a WhatsApp group is decided by the users, this one is for 5 Mums of little girls to communicate primarily about the girls. I wouldn't be surprised to see accomplishments posted in the circumstances you've described. You could mute notifications and just check it when you want to but that might mean you miss out on plans for playdates.

So it’s just a very small group - 5 , inc the OP - of women who have become slightly friendly because their daughters are friends. If they were getting together for a coffee after/before drop off/pick up they would probably be talking about those girls and dropping that sort of thing into conversation because they would think they were in a space where it may be appreciated or at least tolerated. Maybe they are working or have other commitments and this WhatsApp group is one way to keep in touch and talk about one thing they have in common.

Hold your judgement and scroll past - it’s not the class group, nor an activity group to pass on info.

It’s weird, she’s an attention seeker.

Depends. Maybe she doesnt have others to share with. Is she a single parent? Because thats hard. Those moments where you share with your partner aren't there.

Absolutely not it would just make other mums worry if their kid hasn’t met that milestone yet

I wouldn’t do it myself but I can’t see the issue in a small group.

If you don’t want to do it, then obv don’t participate.

It’s easy enough to ignore. And you don’t have to share anything of your own dd if you don’t want to.
I don’t see anything wrong with this, surely it’s nice to see the achievements of others - they are 5/6 years old, just throw the photo a love heart and move on with your day.
Ive never been in a mum’s whatssap group myself but this seems very tame as a source of such annoyance!

I don't think it's particularly weird, but it's not something I'd be interested in