Dh makes me look/sound stupid in front of children

[Pokemongirlx87]

Probably not the right title but not sure how else to word it

Dh is always trying to make me look stupid/silly in front of our children (9 & 5)

Examples are he asked me what an abbreviation for something was earlier, I got all but one word right and then starting saying how stupid I am for not knowing and how our 9 year old is obviously smarter than me

Other example was i didn't rinse the plates to his standard the other day before putting in the dishwasher. They were rinsed but had small amounts of gravy still on, apparently they should be sparkling before going in the dishwasher, so he went on a 20 rant about useless I am at everything and how our youngest is better at housework than me

Is this what you want. Your children to grow up watching you being abused, because you are being abused. If not, then leave. End your marriage, put a stop to this.

He is an abusive POS. Make plans and end it, he won’t change.

As others have said, he thinks he is better than you. He is saying these things to your DC to make them see how superior he is. For some reason he is either feeling inadequate so is tearing you down to build himself up or has fallen out of love, or has someone else telling him he is wonderful in the sidelines.

He doesn't like you.

He’s abusive.

If you have sons, they are learning that this is how you treat women.

If you have daughters, they are learning that this is normal behaviour in a relationship. It isn’t.

Please stand up for yourself. You don’t need to be spoken to as if you’re an idiot. He’s unkind and abusive

You need to call him out on his put downs and ask him why he is doing this .
its not acceptable to be little anyone and your children will
think this is normal and become like him.

Did you pull him up on his behaviour straight away?

If you didn’t, then you must. Call him out as a bully, he’ll not like it.

When he denies his behaviour is bullying/abusive, have your many examples ready.

Say you’ll not put up with a bully. And you definitely do not want your kids to start copying his vile behaviour. So he either stops it or gets the hell out.

One of the last arguments I had with my ex was about how hadn't opened a packet of peas properly. He was laughing and sneering and getting our young daughter to join in about how useless I was. It's strange years later to look back on it. I realise how "small" I'd become in not being able to just laugh in his face about such a ridiculous thing to criticise someone over. All I can say is that I never looked back after we divorced. It was the best decision I ever made. We're actually remarkably civil now, all these years later. My advice would be to think carefully about what you're prepared to put up with. Talk to your friends and family and get lots of support around you. Don't bottle it up, or feel you have to hide or defend what's happening to people you're close to. It'll be easier to make decisions with support in place.

I hate posts like this.

you don’t need us to tell you your husband is abustive and you shouldn’t be putting up with this sort of behaviour but your interact with posts as if they are amusing asides about your passingly annoying husband.

he’s awful and I feel sorry for your children

This makes me heartbroken for you and heartbroken for your kids. You need to make a change. This is not ok or normal. It’s abusive.

Horrible. Domestic abuse. Harmful for both you and the kids.
Can you make a plan to leave? He won't change btw.

Well he’s the stupid one, why would you have a dishwasher if youre doing the job twice, only scrape food, no rinse needed! Maybe he should go do some learning into that.

Yep. I was thinking the same. My Dad did this to my Mum, it chipped away at her self-esteem, she still believes she’s stupid to this day. She divorced him years ago but the psychological abuse she ensured left a lasting impact. If he can’t acknowledge his behaviour is abusive, I’m afraid it’s unlikely he’ll change. Sorry you’re go through this, OP.

Can you be gone before he gets in from Work Monday ?
To your parent’s , sister/ brother / friend .
Let him come home to an empty house .
He’s an asshole .
Kind/ decent people never put other’s down .
While you’re away think about what you want for you & your children’s future , but please, please stop tolerating this OP .

Tell him that you can do better than a relationship with a man who constantly tries to humiliate, criticise and belittle you and that his children don’t need to see such a poor example of a father so unless he stops acting like a dick he’ll be getting divorce papers. And mean it. Life is too short. This behaviour needs to grind to a halt right now.