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Lost it in the parking lot

44 replies

SmudgeButt · 27/02/2026 18:07

Dreadful day on Wednesday which I keep thinking over. Sorry but I'm writing this out of my system hopefully. Very long.

I was heading back to my car with my groceries and had loaded up and was getting in to my car when the couple in the next car arrived. I was parked quite close to their car (passenger sides both) and so the woman ended up standing right at the front of their car waiting to get in. I backed up slowly, aware of her, how close their car was, that I had another big car on the other side I couldn't see past, moving but very cautiously.

Suddenly there was a woman walking close to the back of my car so I slammed on the brakes and gave my horn a beep as if to say "Hey! Careful!!". First mistake.

She scooted around my car, inserted her head in my passenger window (warm day so windows were open) and started shrieking at me that I had tried to hit her. I said something like "you surprised me, I couldn't see you easily" and she continued to shriek about me being stupid for not using my review mirrors. And I said something dumb like "don't be an idiot!" Second mistake.

So still with her head in the window she wound up and smacked my wing mirror and shouted "look!! now you've hit me! you've hit me with your car!" And so I didn't respond with much dignity and said "oh f off, you're an idiot!" Third mistake.

She then starts shouting to the gathering crowd that I tried to back over her and that I've now hit her again with my car. She's going to call the police, she's going to collect evidence. And I respond with a polite "Oh for f sake, why don't you just f off, idiot!" or words to that effect. Losing count of the number of mistakes I made.

She then has walked off a ways so she can start taking pictures of my plate, my car, me. And as I have room now to finish reversing and start going forward so I can leave the parking lot. Unfortunately that means driving towards her. She walks away again and then suddenly turns and lunges towards the car as if to make it look like I was trying to drive in to her. I replied with a surprisingly modest "oh lady, just get out of my way".

At this point she runs around to my side of the car and reaches toward the window. I thought she was going to grab me but I think in fact she may have been trying to take my picture. She's still shouting, I'm shouting back and quite frankly she's so aggressive it's really scary. At this point some bloke that had been getting in his car about 30 feet away runs up and shouts in the passenger window " You're disgusting, really disgusting!". I was very scared and upset but the way is clear so I drive out of the parking lot leaving them all there. It was after this point that I discover that she had hit my side mirror so hard it had been closed, like you do when parking.

Now to be clear - I never hit her. Maybe she felt intimidated when I was driving towards her, that wasn't my intention it was simply to try to get away from her as that was the only way out. I have been the victim of road rage in the past where someone took offence at me being in front of them on the road and when we stopped at some lights jumped out of her car and opened my door and tried to drag me out. Maybe I was reliving that in some sense, I don't know.

I'm not proud of my reactions but hers were way over the top aggressive in my opinion. Not expecting much sympathy but just didn't think of a better way to deal with things at the time. I guess I should have just closed my windows and turned off the engine and wait for her to leave but I didn't think of that at the time.

OP posts:
Coconutter24 · 27/02/2026 19:08

beeautifullif3 · 27/02/2026 18:37

Can you not reverse into parking spaces ?

If you’ve got a trolley full of shopping and you reverse in and there’s also a car parked behind you, how do you get the shopping to the boot? If OPs car is parked that close to another car the women had to wait for her to move to get in how do you expect to get a trolley through? Shopping is the one time I disagree with ‘you should reverse park’

Bearbookagainandagain · 27/02/2026 19:14

I'm not sure I totally trust your perception of the situation given how aggressive and unreasonable you were.
You almost hit someone (your fault), honked at them, proceeded to tell to fuck off and get out of your way, called them an idiot...

I mean, its hard to blame her for getting angry.

A better reaction is not to do any of this. When you almost reverse into someone you apologise and check they are ok.

Monty27 · 27/02/2026 19:14

tripleginandtonic · 27/02/2026 18:10

For real? The onus is on you reversing in a ' parking lot" to take care , no need for the beeping horn or swearing. A hand up and an apology was the only correct course of action Yabvu.

This ^^
You sound aggressive @SmudgeButt and didn't help the situation at all.
As an aside, are you in the States? In UK it's "car park."

Katemax82 · 27/02/2026 19:18

beeautifullif3 · 27/02/2026 18:37

Can you not reverse into parking spaces ?

It's not illegal to forward park

Stressedoutmummyof3 · 27/02/2026 19:21

Bearbookagainandagain · 27/02/2026 19:14

I'm not sure I totally trust your perception of the situation given how aggressive and unreasonable you were.
You almost hit someone (your fault), honked at them, proceeded to tell to fuck off and get out of your way, called them an idiot...

I mean, its hard to blame her for getting angry.

A better reaction is not to do any of this. When you almost reverse into someone you apologise and check they are ok.

Edited

She only reacted like that because the woman was being threatening. Leaning in her window, smacking the car window and screaming at OP.
No-one is going to stay calm in that situation. All the people saying you should be looking I'm assuming they are the people who wander around the car park paying zero attention to the cars. I have managed to walk across car parks for many years often with young children and have never failed to notice a car reversing.

FatTumNoBum · 27/02/2026 19:29

Are you in the States?

No wonder you were hyper anxious and desperate to escape.

I’d be seriously terrified too that the looney woman had a handgun in her handbag. 😱

HisNibs · 27/02/2026 20:30

I think language such as "parking lot" coupled with "warm day so windows were open" says that this isn't in the UK, so citing our highway code is irrelevant.

I agree with other posters in that this lunatic was looking for a fight. Her response was disproportionate and it's perfectly understandable to panic and be terrified.

If this is in the USA, they quite often have angled parking spots (coupled usually with one-way systems) so you cannot reverse into the parking spot anyway.

eurochick · 27/02/2026 20:45

It doesn’t sound like this happened in the UK so I’m not sure what norms or rules would apply.

BeenThereBackThen · 27/02/2026 20:53

SmudgeButt · 27/02/2026 18:07

Dreadful day on Wednesday which I keep thinking over. Sorry but I'm writing this out of my system hopefully. Very long.

I was heading back to my car with my groceries and had loaded up and was getting in to my car when the couple in the next car arrived. I was parked quite close to their car (passenger sides both) and so the woman ended up standing right at the front of their car waiting to get in. I backed up slowly, aware of her, how close their car was, that I had another big car on the other side I couldn't see past, moving but very cautiously.

Suddenly there was a woman walking close to the back of my car so I slammed on the brakes and gave my horn a beep as if to say "Hey! Careful!!". First mistake.

She scooted around my car, inserted her head in my passenger window (warm day so windows were open) and started shrieking at me that I had tried to hit her. I said something like "you surprised me, I couldn't see you easily" and she continued to shriek about me being stupid for not using my review mirrors. And I said something dumb like "don't be an idiot!" Second mistake.

So still with her head in the window she wound up and smacked my wing mirror and shouted "look!! now you've hit me! you've hit me with your car!" And so I didn't respond with much dignity and said "oh f off, you're an idiot!" Third mistake.

She then starts shouting to the gathering crowd that I tried to back over her and that I've now hit her again with my car. She's going to call the police, she's going to collect evidence. And I respond with a polite "Oh for f sake, why don't you just f off, idiot!" or words to that effect. Losing count of the number of mistakes I made.

She then has walked off a ways so she can start taking pictures of my plate, my car, me. And as I have room now to finish reversing and start going forward so I can leave the parking lot. Unfortunately that means driving towards her. She walks away again and then suddenly turns and lunges towards the car as if to make it look like I was trying to drive in to her. I replied with a surprisingly modest "oh lady, just get out of my way".

At this point she runs around to my side of the car and reaches toward the window. I thought she was going to grab me but I think in fact she may have been trying to take my picture. She's still shouting, I'm shouting back and quite frankly she's so aggressive it's really scary. At this point some bloke that had been getting in his car about 30 feet away runs up and shouts in the passenger window " You're disgusting, really disgusting!". I was very scared and upset but the way is clear so I drive out of the parking lot leaving them all there. It was after this point that I discover that she had hit my side mirror so hard it had been closed, like you do when parking.

Now to be clear - I never hit her. Maybe she felt intimidated when I was driving towards her, that wasn't my intention it was simply to try to get away from her as that was the only way out. I have been the victim of road rage in the past where someone took offence at me being in front of them on the road and when we stopped at some lights jumped out of her car and opened my door and tried to drag me out. Maybe I was reliving that in some sense, I don't know.

I'm not proud of my reactions but hers were way over the top aggressive in my opinion. Not expecting much sympathy but just didn't think of a better way to deal with things at the time. I guess I should have just closed my windows and turned off the engine and wait for her to leave but I didn't think of that at the time.

Nobody died. You are now out of that situation and hopefully safely home.

Make yourself a cup of tea, it was a shitty situation but it is done now and finished.

Sounds like the woman got startled by you honking in the first place and took it out on you and it all spiralled downwards from there.

Shit happens. You wasn’t the most polite, neither was she. It’s done, this will too pass

Imlyingandthatsthetruth · 27/02/2026 20:56

Yeah, this is one side of the story, so who's to say? But if this was in the UK the highway code is pretty clear that cars should always be giving way to pedestrians. Yes, I understand.you can't look every direction at once and we've all been caught out by someone walking behind as we reverse (well, I have) even with cameras, but you see them, you brake, you definitely don't blow the horn, that's never going to de-escalate things. Reverse in and this will never be a problem.

OP, you sound quite aggressive to other road users.

GreyfriarsJobbies · 27/02/2026 21:39

If it all happened like you say then the other woman was a nutter but by sounding the horn in that situation you're asking for trouble, which you got, and then did nothing to defuse (quite the opposite in fact). You do sound quite aggressive for somebody that's previously suffered a nasty case of road rage; do you find that trouble seems to follow you around?

RawBloomers · 27/02/2026 22:08

Stressedoutmummyof3 · 27/02/2026 19:21

She only reacted like that because the woman was being threatening. Leaning in her window, smacking the car window and screaming at OP.
No-one is going to stay calm in that situation. All the people saying you should be looking I'm assuming they are the people who wander around the car park paying zero attention to the cars. I have managed to walk across car parks for many years often with young children and have never failed to notice a car reversing.

On the other hand, the loon may only have reacted like that because OP honked at her for walking.

It sounds like hot tempers on both sides escalating the situation unreasonably, Though the loon is a loon for hitting the car and claiming that was OP hitting her with the car.

This is why, even in a supermarket car park where you want to be able to load your boot, it's still better to reverse in so you can drive out forwards.

Uhohnox · 27/02/2026 22:13

And this is why I have a dash cam.

I refuse to drive without one now.

I've been put in situations and I politely say "I have a dash cam recording video and audio just to let you know." and they soon back off.

SmudgeButt · 28/02/2026 04:43

Not sure why someone thinks this is a generated chat. And for those that mentioned it, it was in the UK and while I've lived elsewhere I've never lived in the US. So thankfully no guns were likely to be drawn.

Also while I have a tiddly car the spot wasn't huge and the vehicles either side had reversed in so space wise pulling straight in made more sense. And no warning beeping when reversing and no rear camera.

Thank you for the kind and reassuring responses.

OP posts:
ForPlumReader · 28/02/2026 16:31

DeftGoldHedgehog · 27/02/2026 18:55

It also says in the Highway Code that pedestrians should not walk behind a car with reversing lights on. Plus it's just common sense not to. Yes, you should be looking all around as a driver but you can't always see people when they appear from behind a larger car.

I think that would be virtually impossible in most car parks. Not all car parks (very few IMHO) are well designed and many have no paths for pedestrians at all. The responsibility lies with the driver here, albeit neither of you behaved well. Perhaps you both got a fright, but pumping your horn and swearing is not an appropriate way to react.

Easterbunnygettingawrapping · 28/02/2026 16:39

Ime those who walk behind cars in car parks are usually fuckwits... There is only so many times you can check mirrors before having to actually move!!

Imlyingandthatsthetruth · 28/02/2026 17:30

Easterbunnygettingawrapping · 28/02/2026 16:39

Ime those who walk behind cars in car parks are usually fuckwits... There is only so many times you can check mirrors before having to actually move!!

Huh? So now we can't walk behind cars in car parks? Any other restrictions you'd like to invent?

ForPlumReader · 28/02/2026 19:34

Imlyingandthatsthetruth · 28/02/2026 17:30

Huh? So now we can't walk behind cars in car parks? Any other restrictions you'd like to invent?

This! Where else are pedestrians supposed to walk, into oncoming cars?

Stressedoutmummyof3 · 28/02/2026 19:45

Imlyingandthatsthetruth · 28/02/2026 17:30

Huh? So now we can't walk behind cars in car parks? Any other restrictions you'd like to invent?

Of course you can! Just not while the car is reversing, isn't that just common sense?

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