To limit screen time this much?

[Ionlymakejokestodistractmyself]

My DC are 13 and 10.

They don't have smartphones and no social media as a result.

They are allowed 1 hour of gaming / tablet time three times per week. This usually means Minecraft. We do also game as a family once or twice a week, maybe 1 hour total.

They're allowed to watch TV most days (not super strict but do limit it eg not on all day) plus we often watch a film or two at the weekend as a family.

I try to stop them watching any YouTube shorts / brain rot content. They are both ND and already struggle with focus and attention span.

We never take devices in car, restaurant etc

DC13 (y8) will try to sneak onto YouTube Shorts a lot (he has a tablet). He says I'm far too strict and it's unfair.

Just want to get a feel for what others do and whether I should unclench a bit.

Sounds fair to me ! (I’m a mum of 3 boys) I don’t let them on YouTube either.

We don’t have a TV. Not that I’m saying what can be seen on a pad is similar. So DS watches things on YouTube. I have started putting a timer on, it has helped.
Plays games when at fathers at weekends, i don’t like /agree with some of it, but see some of it as at least being only when there.

listen to the diary of a CEO pod cast on brain rot and it will reassure you you are doing the right then. What short video content is doing to developing brains is truly terrifying. I am not sure what to do for the best, as DD in particular always finds ways around the bans we put in place (you can watch, basically, shorts on pinterest now apparently 😳). Other screen time, like movies or longer format TV is far less damaging. Gaming can also be ok within reason and keeping an eye on signs of addiction.

I wish I did what you do, although I’d allow some YouTube (as long as you know the YouTubers aren’t dodgy) but all in all that sounds good. If you want them to think you’re compromising maybe add another day but well done in general (from someone arguing way too much at the moment because they’re hooked again)

The more you let them have, the more they will ask for so I don't think you can use that as a measure of whether you are reasonable.
Are they sharing the hour or having one hour each, with the other watching?
Is there a reason it's three times a week and not a shorter amount of time daily (just because I think the same routine each day can be easier to manage).
But in the long run you are doing them a huge favour by limiting this, though they may never thank you for it.

YouTube is banned here except for a couple of channels they have to ask to go on (all the TV YT apps are protected with a code) like Danny Go. Not so bothered about gaming, we do a lot of Minecraft in this house! But YT short form content is brain rot and on the odd occasion DD1(7) sees it somewhere her behaviour is noticeably worse. Watching CBeebies and some stuff on kids Netflix doesn’t have anywhere near the same effect.

Youtube blocked here too. Occasional access given for school related stuff. Their behaviour falls off a cliff if they spend time on it and their attention span disappears

My kids do have smart phones but no social media. They can't download apps unless we give electronic consent. They get all their homework assigned online so some device access is necessary.
Music is on there all the time, along with Duolingo and some basic learning games and electronic chess/kindle. Minecraft is time limited along with any other games. They have apps like Netflix, iPlayer and Prime but no access during the week unless by request/approval and an hour on one on the weekend so they can watch something they choose if they wake early. No reason why they couldn't use the TV though.
The actual TV is on a smart plug so it only goes on after dinner in the evening so between us we are stuck watching what works for everyone. We eat pretty late so realistically they very rarely watch more than a couple hours of TV Mon-Friday

What you are doing sounds about right to me. Hold the line!

I have a 10 yr old. She has screen time for 1 hour 4 days a week.Only got nintendo switch this christmas and access to a chromebook 2 in one since last autumn but its not hers.
She doesnt yet realise the switch can be a handheld device so its only on the tv so far. That'll probably change soon but she does tend to get drawn in completely with screens so we're being cautious.
You tube only allowed for art videos or specific things to find things out.
She uses the chromebook only at the dining table for her school stuff and cbbc games or simple stuff like avatar world and a driving game she likes. This means supervision is easy at the moment.
We don't restrict TV too much and she generally doesn't overdo it.
I do give her extra time on a screen sometimes if she specifically asks and has generally not been asking and has been playing and otherwise occupied.
It works well for us starting with a schedule that can be increased as she grows and manages more. We've discussed with her that it's not so much about the screens but more what she's not doing when she's on them.
She is a young ten, still plays with toys and we want to continue that as much as possible.

Thanks, it doesn't sound too different from what some of you are saying, although I think 13 and 10 are quite different.

Lots of my older DC friends are on Snap, Tiktok etc posting and seeing all sorts.

My DC are 12 and 10 and our limits are much the same.

12yo does have a smart phone but very restricted. No apps (not even a browser) although he did "earn" Duolingo.

He has a laptop for school but monitored (by us) YouTube is not allowed beyond what he needs for school.

Otherwise they get 1 hour of gaming 3 times a week. 1 hour of TV on weekend mornings (plus whatever we watch as a family).

I have a 13 and 10 yo,

The 13 yo does have a smartphone. She has WhatsApp and Spotify which do have some SM content. WhatsApp is capped at 30 minutes- the idea is she gets enough time to message friends but not enough to scroll mindless channel content. She’s allowed 10 minutes YouTube and 10 min Capcut.

They both have tablets which have screen time controls, set at 1h 45 of screen time a day but actually only allowed on one weeknight and at weekends. YouTube blocked for 10yo, 10 minutes for 13 yo.

No Snapchat or Tiktok for either.

What worries me is that it’s perfectly possible to access mindless video crap through other avenues that are harder to limit or block eg various websites. I’ve blocked YouTube.com, tiktok.com but I’m sure there are plenty of others. Unfortunately I think there are lots of parents out there who think they have it all under control but they don’t really. Possibly including us…

My kids are a bit younger than yours (8 and 10) but we're similar, if not more strict.

Absolutely no YouTube, I HATE it and am standing firm on that. They don't have their own tablets so don't use one at all really (have one family one which we've lost somewhere in the house months ago 🤦‍♀️) so screen time is mainly TV (generally a cbbc series but we do have Netflix and Disney+ although I can't think of anything they really watch on those apart from films) and we watch a few things together as a family, mainly quiz shows and Gladiators.

They also share a nintendo switch which we have set up on a spare TV rather than handheld and they usually go on that on a Sat morning before clubs and sometimes Sat afternoon too and/or Sunday morning- we don't have specific time limits but do limit it once they're on, I.e. tell them a time it needs to go off.

No smart phones and when my eldest needs one it'll be a brick for calls and texts only. There's so, so much evidence of the multiple ways in which screens and phones and social media damage kids (and adults!) and I think slowly the tide is turning. Your kids will thank you one day that you looked after them with this.

I think it is very strict. Whether that's for the best or not, you know your DC best.

My concern would be, what's your long term plan? This until he's 18? Or does he get some responsibility when he's 14? Or 15? Or 16? Where's the bit where you teach him how to manage it himself, how to cope when he hits adulthood? You don't become immune to the allure of screens when you turn 18.

I don't think having close supervision and screen limits under 14 means those limits will be static. It's a bit strange to assume that parents with strict limits aren't also discussing, educating and allowing responsibility in line with their child's abilities and needs and doing their best to educate themselves and think critically about all choices. Just as much as it would be strange to assume that giving more freedom leads to more responsible and safer use.

I'd just be slightly concerned that they may fall behind on technology especially if all their screen time is Minecraft.
Tablets and smartphones are villainised but in today's world you need to use them and for a lot of jobs in the future you will need to be adept at knowing how to use them (more than just scrolling) along with how to work AI.

Using today's technology is almost entirely skill-free, though. They'll catch up in an afternoon.

Definitely not too strict in my opinion. I had the exact same issue with my own kids and it was not even just the amount of screen time, it was how quickly YouTube would drag them from something fine into Shorts and total brain rot.
That was actually why I made an app called KidzTube. I wanted something where parents could choose exactly which channels and videos were allowed, and then that is all the kids can watch. No random recommendations, no endless spiral into rubbish, and you can hide Shorts, set watch time limits, etc.
So I really do get where you are coming from. For some kids, especially those who already struggle with focus, that kind of content is just too much. It does not sound like you need to unclench to me. It sounds like you know your own children well and are setting boundaries that work for your family.