A couple of his work colleagues are 38 going on 18 - "ooh look, alcohol, let's drink as much as we possibly can then pass out - what fun!" and are always trying to get him out with them in that way men do "surely you're not scared of what your wife might say etc etc".
He's been on a leaving do since lunchtime and is now asleep on the doormat. Who shall I slap first - him or them?