half siblings

[PumpkinSurprise]

just wondering, those of you that had a half sibling get in contact as an adult do you now have a close relationship with them? my children have a half sibling on their fathers side they are aware but have shown no interest in contact, i am aware the half sibling could reach out to them in the future so just wondered those of you that have had this happen do you now have a close relationship with them even if they got in touch as adults?

I have a friend that is now best mates with a half sibling they didn't know they had. They found each other in their 40's. They have a lovely relationship.

I have half siblings from both of my parents. I consider those on my mums side as full siblings, we grew up together in the same house and as adults talk and message often. I’m not as close to those on my dads side, we didn’t see each other often as kids and don’t much as adults but when we do, we’re definitely brothers/sisters.

Yes we met at 44. Two of them(2dbs) at same time. We live in different parts of country and meet up two or three times a year for the weekend and we whatsapp loads. They have more in common with each other than with me (as i think 2 men with similar interests) but we all get on. Closer obviously to my dB I grew up with. It's an easier relationship.

I have but don’t have much of a relationship at all. We live at opposite ends of the country and there is a large age gap

My DH had a child from an earlier relationship. I’ve never met them, DH has had sporadic contact but it’s complicated. For that reason I didn’t encourage contact with my DC but left it for them to decide. DS isn’t interested at all, DD had some contact as a young adult but it fizzled out, they have nothing in common and aren’t close in age. Never say never, but it seems unlikely they will connect again.

My DDs have a half sibling at home (ds), who they consider to be a sibling no different to themselves. They also have a half sibling from their dad’s second wife, they saw this sibling eow for around 10 years, they now see him maybe 5/6 times a year (arranged between themselves) . Then they have another sibling and 3 step siblings at their dads who they have when younger seen every month. They see them a few times a year.

If you don’t have the shared childhood together it’s definitely harder to forge a relationship

I have a half sibling from my dad. She’s actually the same age as my adult youngest son 😳, so a big age difference (24 yrs) . I’m not in contact with my dad or his wife and haven’t been for 30 years, so the situation was awkward. I had hoped we’d be friends. I’ve always wanted a sister, when I was growing up, I always thought how lovely it must be to have a sister, I was hoping that she would become my sister, my close sister. I waited to an age where I thought she might know about me, they might have told her about me. It was coming closer and closer that we had so many mutual family members on FB, she must have wondered who I was in tagged photos and posts etc with my dads side of the family who I was close to. Weirdly our hobbies almost set us colliding one day, so I did message her before that happened, I knew the time was coming and yes she did know of me. She was about 21?22?24? By this point.

i saw her a few times, I really enjoyed the friendship we had momentarily but it didn’t last. I felt she made no effort, I felt a bit used and the final nail in the coffin was where she was seeing all my stories on instagram etc but could never reply to any of my messages despite seeing them in under 2 mins!! My husband told me to take her off my insta. He said it’s not like I’m ever going to see her again and she’s just nosing at all my stuff without actually wanting to be my friend. I felt uncomfortable that my husband said that her mum, my dad etc might be looking at all my stuff too, through her. So I took her off and just kept her on facebook. I left it about 5 years and I contacted her again on facebook, just to say that I thought about her often and hope that she was well. I got a curt short polite reply. I messaged her straight after just to continue the conversation really , but she never ever opened it. It will be the last time I contact her, I’ve tried quite a lot now from my end I feel. I don’t know if she’ll get to my age or just older generally and feel differently about it all. I don’t know how I’ll feel in the future if she does contact me, I’m trying to see things from her point of view…has she really been told the truth? Are my dad and stepmom doing me a disservice (even though kindly I was nice about them for her sake)? Is she just too young to approach and appreciate me? I don’t know it’s all very complex.
i think all you can do is wait and see how things pan out

I have two - one older, adopted into another family, traced us when I was c17 (40 years ago). We're in contact but dont see each other often.

The other one is 20 years younger than me. Ive met them about three times. Mutual disinterest. I think another sibling is in touch with them.

I don't. My dad has a much younger half sibling on his dad's side. They were in touch sporadically but now not at all. Nothing in common now my grandad has passed.

I have a few much younger half siblings, all are a similar age to my son. Knew all of them as children, they spent a lot of time with my son obviously.

No contact with them since they became adults. Some years a Christmas card from one or two of them, at the moment not even that for three years.

I've got two different half siblings, one older, one younger. Three different mums and the same dad.

Despite not growing up with them I love them dearly. We all have a shared bond in dealing with our dad who has never grown out of being a scoundrel.

Thanks all for sharing your stories, me and my brother are my dads only children so it’s not something I will experience I do have several half siblings on my mums side though but we grew up together so obviously a different situation! They don’t see their father so I don’t know if that affects things but so far they have shown no interest in having contact maybe things will change when they are older although I don’t have any of his details.

It seems if (they’re the children of your mum and) you grow up together in the same household, they’re considered siblings.

If you don’t grow up in the same household I don’t think that relationship ever really forms.

Yeah I actually read you are considered siblings if you share a mum but half siblings if it’s same dad but different mum.

No, I have 2 half siblings on my dad’s side, they were born when I was in my teens, never grew up with them or had much contact. I don’t consider them as siblings, they are practically strangers to me and I already have two siblings. It would probably upset my Dad to know that’s how I see things though.

My dad was born illegitimate in 1925 . 20 years later his mum got married and gave birth to his half brother . Even though there was a 20year age gap the existed as brothers . Half was never used in their relationship. This uncle was only 8 years older than me and he was close to me and my two brothers as well as to our dad .
he only died 18 months ago and I miss him very much .

We don’t use half in real life this is just for the purpose of the thread, my kids don’t call him brother as they’ve never met they know their father has another child but they don’t mention him much if they ever do it’s just “his other child”

My ex had two more children in (very) quick succession, they're amazing and a wonderful addition of siblings for my son. I could only have him so it's great to have that extension for him.

is that as kids? im talking about as adults as they wont have a relationship as kids as no contact with their father but thats thats nice its worked in your situation, its the opposite for us i have 4 kids and his other child is an only child so i wonder if he is more likely to want that connection