I met a group of people (5 people) recently on social media who seemed to be likeminded in terms of planning for an upcoming event.
We began planning in oct 2025 for an event to take place in April 26’. We met regularly online once a week to plan, update each other and discuss how we could execute the plan well. Due to one of the members (member S) being well versed in events and venues we could use; they suggested we hold said event in their hometown as they had connections. Weeks went on and we planned to find the venue and find potential special guests that would help make the event a hit. I stressed several times that we needed to be moving forward abit faster with planning as the closer we leave it to till the event; the more pressure it will be on us to get things done on time. Also due to other responsibilities outside of the event (+ kids, +a full time job), it would be difficult to find time to get things done. Everyone had actions and priorities that they were in charge of. Weeks turned into months and whilst the 4 of us were getting on with our prioritised projects; member S seemingly hadn’t done anything. When we would ask for an update we would be lied to, false promises were made, member S would straight up ignore any questions asked and even began declining to join when we would meet online for our weekly meetings. This caused delay and due to a lack of progression - we pushed the date back twice to allow for more time.
A few members of the group began to complain that we believed member S wasn’t taking this seriously (especially as member S was not working, had no kids or responsibilities and didn’t have to go far to do things such as collect items from a specific supplier that was in their hometown and was around a 20 min drive from their home). This also meant that other members were having to take over the responsibilities of member S and member S didn’t do anything as the other 4 of us (who live hours away) were forced to do everything. The other members work full time and 3 of us had young children (including me). Also; I live 3 hours away from where the event would be held so I could not collect from the suppliers myself. The other 3 members (excluding member S) said that we should push forward with the 4 of us instead of getting member S involved as they wasn’t serious. I agreed. We began to plan with the 4 of us but after a week or two; they said member S was still involved and they wanted to give them a second chance. I agreed reluctantly but said if member S is to continue; they have to start taking more responsibility and not making excuses as to why they haven’t done it.
Weeks went on again and it seemed the connections member S had said they had at the beginning of planning; was a lie. Nothing they said manifested and every week we were met with more excuses and more lies.
We were due to meet again last week to again plan for the event that is now due to happen in April 26’ and due to nothing being completed; I stepped down and decided I wouldn’t take part anymore as I felt we wasn’t making any progress and felt it is unfair for 5 of us to be involved, but the one member who has had the most say (and has done 0 actions) hadn’t done anything and wanted to be ‘in charge’ of the event and the planning.
Now the other 4 members of the group are giving me the cold shoulder as they feel I was wrong to drop out so close to the date of the event (April 2026). My argument is; I was more than happy to take part but we all have to do our part and be on the same page. If we make a decision it needs to be final and we can’t keep swaying left to right to give member S more chances to delay us more.
Just to confirm at this point; we have nothing secured. No venue, no special guest and no confirmed numbers of who will be attending. I would also be required to travel 3 hours up to the event (and 3 hours back) and stay in a hotel to ensure I am present. Member S lives 5 mins away from the event.