To be annoyed with DP’s parenting

CurlingChamp · 2026-02-22T16:08:15+00:00

Today has not gone as planned and the weather is against us. I woke DP just after 11 by letting the kids in to our bedroom (I’d been up since 6 with them) as I was trying to get some work done (I’m self-employed). He’s fed the kids (2 & 8) chicken noodles for lunch - fine, there’s not much in. He’s referred to the game that DS8 is playing (not on a screen) as rubbish. He’s watching a 12 rated superhero film because he doesn’t want to watch anymore kids tv and he refuses to believe that they’re not suitable for small children. He’s play fighting with DS8 over one of DS’s toys, told him not to be such a spas. I asked him not to say that, he says he can say what he likes. When it got to the point that he made DS8 cry and he ran to his room, DP told him to stop acting like a girl. These are not the first time any of these things have happened. How would you feel about it?

boredwfh · 22/02/2026 16:11

Ugh, why are you with this man? Firstly I wouldn’t expect my partner to still be bed at 11am especially if I was meant to be working at he had a day off self employed or not. His language is disgusting & tbh it sounds like weaponised incompetence so that you don’t ask him to parent again. Has he always been like this? I’d honestly lose all respect for him and you’d probably find it easier as a single parent without this man child around creating more work for you.

CarrierbagsAndPJs · 22/02/2026 16:12

He sounds like a wanker. What are your options?

JLou08 · 22/02/2026 16:14

I think you need to pick your battles. Superhero films rated 12 generally are enjoying by younger children. 12 is more like a PG rating. Saying the game is boring is no big deal. Noodles not too bad, as you said yourself, so why mention it?
The language isn't good. Maybe focus on that and explain the issues with it. If you criticise everything he does he is just going to shut off from whatever you have to say.

CarrierbagsAndPJs · 22/02/2026 16:18

JLou08 · 22/02/2026 16:14

I think you need to pick your battles. Superhero films rated 12 generally are enjoying by younger children. 12 is more like a PG rating. Saying the game is boring is no big deal. Noodles not too bad, as you said yourself, so why mention it?
The language isn't good. Maybe focus on that and explain the issues with it. If you criticise everything he does he is just going to shut off from whatever you have to say.

It isnt one battle though is it? It is an entire list of him being a bit shit as a father in one afternoon, as he slept through the morning.

Original poster

CurlingChamp · 22/02/2026 16:21

JLou08 · 22/02/2026 16:14

I think you need to pick your battles. Superhero films rated 12 generally are enjoying by younger children. 12 is more like a PG rating. Saying the game is boring is no big deal. Noodles not too bad, as you said yourself, so why mention it?
The language isn't good. Maybe focus on that and explain the issues with it. If you criticise everything he does he is just going to shut off from whatever you have to say.

I mentioned the food because it’s the 39p packet from Lidl’s I keep for when I need to feed DS8 in a hurry. Not for a Sunday lunchtime when there’s nothing else needs doing apart from making lunch. But you’re right, without all the other stuff it’s not worth mentioning.

OP posts:

CarrierbagsAndPJs · 22/02/2026 16:23

CurlingChamp · 22/02/2026 16:21

I mentioned the food because it’s the 39p packet from Lidl’s I keep for when I need to feed DS8 in a hurry. Not for a Sunday lunchtime when there’s nothing else needs doing apart from making lunch. But you’re right, without all the other stuff it’s not worth mentioning.

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How much parenting does he do generally daily? How much cooking? How much housework?

Harrietsaunt · 22/02/2026 16:23

He sounds like a thoroughly unpleasant specimen

Abd80 · 22/02/2026 16:35

Whoa - why is he in bed for 5 hours after you get up with the children ?!!! Like that’s half the day gone Wtaf. And that’s before all of the other sh*t. What a manchild. Have you considered giving him an ultimatum that you may leave if he doesn’t get a grip ? Because then you’d have one less child to look after. You’re already single-mothering.

OuijaBoard · 22/02/2026 16:36

I would feel upset and confused that my partner and parent of my children appears to have turned into (or revealed himself as) a disablist and a misogynist AND that he's invoking the Cartman Response ("I do what I want!!") rather than having a calm private conversation with me about how to handle a disagreement about parenting. I guess I would try to figure out what's going on - has he always been like this or has something happened? Can I convince him not to say these things to or in front of the children?

In the meantime, I suppose I'd try to build up the children's resilience and objectivity (it's only words, no need to cry) and make sure they know that these comments are inappropriate but sometimes people will still say them, and for now the best thing to do is just ignore dad when he makes a mistake like that.

saltandvinegarpringles · 22/02/2026 16:37

What's the point of him, exactly?

MorrisonsPlatter · 22/02/2026 16:40

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Original poster

CurlingChamp · 22/02/2026 16:42

I think I’m still annoyed with him from Friday night, when DS8 needed 27p more than what was in his piggy bank for a game upgrade on his tablet. DS offered to do some work to earn the extra money (this is the agreement we have and I ended up giving him a £1 to clean the bathroom sink) however, DP suggested he could probably find 27p in loose change around the place if he looked.

Then on Saturday morning, I take DS8 to sports club. DP asked (in front of DS) why I was insisting on taking him.

OP posts:

CarrierbagsAndPJs · 22/02/2026 17:46

CurlingChamp · 22/02/2026 16:42

I think I’m still annoyed with him from Friday night, when DS8 needed 27p more than what was in his piggy bank for a game upgrade on his tablet. DS offered to do some work to earn the extra money (this is the agreement we have and I ended up giving him a £1 to clean the bathroom sink) however, DP suggested he could probably find 27p in loose change around the place if he looked.

Then on Saturday morning, I take DS8 to sports club. DP asked (in front of DS) why I was insisting on taking him.

Insisting on taking him at all or instead of your dp?