Is it normal to feel slightly jealous when friends have other friends

[TheCyanStork]

I often feel a slight pang or sinking feeling when I see my friend having fun or sometimes even just mentioning their fun with another friend. Not a resentful jealousy, just more of a feeling of “I bet she’s having more fun with her than with me” or “No one will ever love me” then I’ll just move on.

This probably sound a bit OTT but does anyone else feel this way?

I think it's not uncommon. This'll go back to childhood/family stuff and your basic schema. Just acknowledge the feeling, don't beat yourself up about it and move on.

I don’t feel jealous, no. I do sometimes assume a friend might get along better with/ have more in common with some other pals, but I don’t mind, that’s life. As long as I feel appreciated in a connection, I don’t need to be the number one figure for anyone.

I think it’s human but as a pp said don’t dwell. It’s more to do with your own self esteem. You want to have your own friends in different places too and wouldn’t want someone judging you for that. I have friends that are completely different and I enjoy different things with them. One doesn’t diminish the other.

For me, no not normal. I’ve never felt that my friends would have a better time with someone other than me. I feel that my friends want more of me than I can give.

I have one friend who determindley keeps us apart from each other. Totally bizarre. It's as if she's frightened I might 'take' the friend away from her! We sometimes attend the same group but there is no opportunity to exchange phone numbers otherwise I would. All the more ridiculous as we are all in our 70s.

Yes, I feel like this sometimes. I have one friend who I've only known for a few years but we've become quite close in that time. I sometimes think that she must like her other friends, who she's known for longer, better than she likes me. I try to remind myself that I'm being ridiculous and different friends play different roles in people's lives. As long as the person is a good friend to you, that's all that matters.

I occasionally feel a pang when friends hang out without me, but remind myself that a strong network of friends, sort of a community, benefits all of us.

I have a friend like this though she's happy to make friends with my friends. I find it weird. I tend to make Facebook friends with anyone I meet but I'm very aware that friendship covers a multitude of categories - some are close friends for like and some are casual acquaintances you only see occasionally. I'm find that it works both ways - I don't expect to be invited to everything just because we're Facebook friends

Perfectly normal unless you are a cyborg. The trick is to lean into it. Always ask after the other pals and check that latest activity went well.

I don’t think it’s normal, but I think it’s quite common. Did you feel the same as a child? It is a school girl behaviour I think some develop and don’t grow out of.

Yes . Also amplified with ADHD and rsd x

I don’t mind it to a certain degree but when I was younger my best friend met a new friend where she’d moved to. They shared a lot in common including kids. Then she invited her to visit her family in Ireland. We met up after there for my other best friend’s birthday. I mean I was sort of bothered but then sort of not bothered too.

I had this with another close friend, we did everything together then she had another close friend. But I got over it.

I agree with @WhatNext2026 , it’s not uncommon.

What I minded was when I’d meet with a friend and their friend, and my friend would be obviously payong more attention to their other friend.

I found it bemusing but I didn’t let on. Those friendships died away but we’re still friends after 25 years.