To expect notice before neighbour switches my water off?

[PolitelyFumingNextDoor]

NC and will try not to out myself in the detail 🫣

I live in a maisonette. The stopcock valve that is in the pavement in front of our building controls the water for both upstairs and downstairs maisonettes. I understand there will be occasions when the water will need to be switched off to allow work to be carried out, but am I being unreasonable to expect to be told when this happens? Ideally given notice too?

On a previous occasion my neighbour had a plumber who switched off my water, I could hear someone banging upstairs so I assumed there was someone working upstairs but I'd been home and noone had let me know. On that occasion I messaged my neighbour to ask if she was having work done and asked to be told in future before the water was switched off. On that occasion I was WFH so I could have filled the kettle before it was switched off for example.

This morning at 9am my water went off again, I saw the plumber and said I needed it back on immediately as I needed to use the shower and I had an appointment to get to. When it wasn't put back on I went to the front door and my neighbour came and said I'd told her I didn’t want to know when she was having work at her house.

A couple of months ago she messaged first thing in the morning when I was on school run to say someone was coming to read the meter and asked me to reply immediately to say I'd read the message. I replied in a hurry as I was about to spend 20 mins driving and had a Zoom call to attend as soon as I got home. My reply was along the lines of we have our own meter, your meter has nothing to do with me. She obviously got the hump and said fine, I'll never let you know anything again. When I realised she'd taken offence, I replied to apologise if my message had offended, explained I thought she wanted access to my property to see the meter and explained she didnt. I said I didn't need notice for people going to her house unless it would impact is, mentioned the water being switched off, and the times her window cleaners have come into my garden and scared the crap out of me and the kids.

Am I being unreasonable to expect to be told when my water is being switched off? And to expect my neighbour to mention to her plumbers that the stopcock controls both properties? Even in an emergency, where notice can't be given, I expect the courtesy of someone knocking to inform me. They literally walk past my front door to do it.

Normal people would rightly be fuming to have such a rude and stupid woman as a neighbour, of course you warn people the water will be cut off!

Is your neighbour autistic? What they seem to have heard is “I must tell my neighbour about everything to do with plumbing.” And when you told them you didn’t need to hear about their water metre check, they heard “ you were wrong. She doesn’t want to be told anything about any work being done to plumbing.”

Maybe your neighbour simply can’t imagine what might affect you or what might be a polite normal thing to do?

I wonder if the rise in autism diagnosis is because previously they were a very clear set manners or rules about what to do indifferent situations that parents or schools could teach young people. When folk are left to work it out themselves autism can become apparent.

Very frustrating for you. You might need to work out if you’re happy to hear about everything or nothing.

at our freehold terrace house, the water supply splits after the external boundary stop cock and feeds three houses 🤦🏽‍♀️😂 the plumber said - no wonder the water pressure isn’t great!

• Agog that 3% of those responding think you're being unreasonable!!!

If I’d had this conversation about notice several times then I wonder would she take notice if tou just went to the Toby and turned your supply back on? After all you haven’t been informed of work being carried out so perhaps it was turned off by accident? Might sharpen the mind about consequences of not communicating?

Oh don't be so silly

This reminds me of the time my next door neighbour needed to access his external stopcock. Each house had one at the bottom of their drive. He was out there with other (male) neighbours, lots of macho culture in the road where I lived. They were all scrutinising the metal covers for access - mine had been replaced by the water board for some reason and was all shiny and new, and it was outside MY house. He had a long look, lots of pointing and glaring at my house, group discussion, then they all decided the nice new one MUST be his, ignored the old one outside his house and turned my water off. Neighbour was then was totally confused why it hadn't done the job in his house and came to complain to me that he couldn't use the nice new stopcock. On account of it not being connected to his house ...

It was like watching what it must have been like when a group of apes tried to figure out how to use a stick for the first time, fascinating.

Anyway, your neighbour is rude. Turn theirs off by "mistake" see how they like it.

Get your supply separated, so you have separate stopcocks

You should check your contact details with your suppliers - I always get notifications of planned works from my electricity and water suppliers!

Your neighbour sounds like an absolute arse but you're moving soon so do you need the aggro of a confrontation when you're going?

(On the other hand, I'd be so tempted to bid her a cordial farewell on the day and to tell her how glad I was that I'd never see her again.)

Yes, she definitely knows the stopcock shuts off both properties. We had the same issue only a couple of months ago and it was her brother who told us that it switched off both when we first moved in.

Bill is split, we have a water meter under our kitchen sink.

I think the garden bin saga is over thankfully. We'll leave it in the shed when we're on holiday and make her pay to clean it if she uses it at any other point. She has been using various other neighbours more recently. I assume without permission but haven't got involved.

I did get a lock for our garden hose tap as her gardeners used to use that 🙄

Ugh, the corner shop at the end of our terrace street once turned off the water supply to half our street because they didn't know where their properties individual stopcock was, with no notice to anyone. Needless to say a bunch of angry neighbours, some of whom had been mid washer cycle etc, got them to turn it on and NOT touch it again and find their own bloody stopcock!

I’m surprised that each maisonette doesn’t have its own stop tap…..probably under the kitchen sink???

It’s illegal to switch off water off another household.
Contact local water authority: tell them what’s been happening.

Some people are odd. I friend (not a close one) dumped me because she thought my reply to her WhatsApp message was rude. It wasn’t. She totally got the wrong end of the stick and didn’t believe my explanation.

Yes ex water company employee here too. I agree you need to apply for an independent supply. It’s very old fashioned to have a shared supply these days. They’ll come and survey it and see if you can get your own supply. They’ve managed to sub meter it so should be able to at least isolate each pipe even if for some reason you can’t have an independent supply.

At this point I would just turn it back on, and when they complain explain you obviously thought there was an issue with it so tried turning it off and on again until it worked as you knew they would have told you if they had turned the supply off.

My uncle was a plumber and I am sure he told me that you could also temporarily freeze or stop the pipes in the property itself to do work if the stopcock was shared (eg in a communal building).

I wouldn't go full legal on her, OP, you'll only have to disclose it when you sell the house.

She sounds like a moron

Obviously it’s not possible to give notice in an emergency but as other have pointed out plumbers don’t usually let you know when they will come (maybe Monday tends to be the usual response..)

it does sound like she was telling you all the stuff to do with water related issues and then when she got a less polite response from you has clearly decided it isn’t worth the aggro.

i’ll be honest if I’d got that response I wouldn’t bother informing you of anything in future either (although it does sound like she is out of order re bins etc).

What, even if you got the follow up that OP said she sent apologising for being abrupt and explaining what she meant? You wouldn't have the courtesy ever again to send a text to say the water was going to be turned off?

I've been thinking about this - I'm pretty sure we needed to switch off the main one years ago when we had work done, but similarly, we had a major leak in the kitchen in the middle of the night years ago, and I attempted to switch off the outside stop cock but it was caked in mud and impossible to reach. My FIL came over and managed to switch something off under the kitchen sink to stop the water. I have a feeling that only isolated the kitchen tap rather than the whole property.

We need to get our bathroom taps changed so I might wait until that is done before reporting to the water company in case we need to get it switched off. I'll give her notice when plumber is booked, because I think it's so unreasonable that I wouldn't even do it to spite her.

She's not allowed to just turn off your water supply, especially if there's zero communication with you (either in advance or at the time). If it ever happens again, you could just go out and turn it back on. The risk to you is that this means a mini-flood into your house. But then she'll be liable to pay for any damage - your insurance company will help with this!

If she wants a plumber to do work in her house, she could ask them to either (a) temporarily freeze the pipe and/or (b) install a stopcock inside her property, so that she can turn her own water supply off whenever she wants to in future without impacting on you.

In the meantime, I'cd recommend leaving a message above the water main, either a laminated notice inside or something written on a very heavy block placed directly above it.

Unless it is an emergency they should be giving you as much notice as possible and at least 48 hours. For an emergency they should at least be knocking on their way back from switching it off and explaining what is going on.

Do you both own or rent? If she is renting it may be her landlord not giving her notice so you may need to take it up with them.