DH work friend

[Lnoga78]

My DH’s phone is synced with his iPad, and the other day, when I was on it, I noticed so many messages and calls between him and his female work colleague. So many. He mentions her, but the extent of the messages was a bit odd. Mostly work gossip, work drama, etc. Still, many messages include him telling her about his insomnia and health issues, discussing our kids, sending photos of him with dogs, messages at 6 am, and messages on Sunday. Again, nothing bad in them, but it appears full on, yet he never told me anything about it. Often, I see she’s very understanding and caring, suggesting that he speak to the GP, etc. Then he asks her when she’s in the office. Unsure what to think of it.

Has he not ever even mentioned her by name?

as far as I’m concerned any half of a happily married or long term relationship does not communicate with work colleagues at 6am or in Sundays not at any time that is family time.

my oh works way for work a lot , I hear about work colleagues , but there’s no texts outside of work hours. And there’s definitely no photos.

i am sorry.

So whilst he is supposed to be spending time with you and his children his thoughts are on this woman. His relationship with her is more important than this time with his family.
It's an emotional affair OP. I'm sorry.

I'd be keeping an eye on the conversation that's for sure

So he wakes at 6 and the first thing he does is message her. No, that is not normal or acceptable.

You can’t text your colleagues on a Sunday if you’re in a relationship!?

I text and message many of my colleagues often.n, because they’ve become my friends. If this is unusual for OP’s husband and he’s hiding it then I can see the concern, but of course you can text your work mates on a weekend.

He did, but said they speak and text all the time. Call logs show so many calls. The messages have been set to disappear as well I see as of a few weeks back.

An ex of mine used to receive frequent calls and emails from a married friend. He’d spend kid friendly days with her and her kids. They’re married now. The marriage followed directly on from the friendship... when did it become more than a friendship? Well before he and I split and well before she left her husband.

This! Sorry Op, this isn’t good!

Funny how these men never text male colleagues as frequently, at 6am or with similar content.
Why is that do we suppose? 🤔

Would he notice if you turn off the dissapering messages. ?

Ohh you definitely need to keep an eye on this, that is very sus that he has turned them on to disappear. BUT keep cards to chest as he will only deny. Time to go Detective mode and snoop- Have you looked through his photo albums to see if he's saved any photos. Also check recently deleted. Also his bank account to see if he's spending on fancy lunches/drinks etc.

This is how my ExH’s affair began!