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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Please help me sort my finances!!!! AIBU to withdraw money from private pension to pay off credit card.

92 replies

ShameSames · 17/02/2026 11:49

I’d really appreciate no judgement here, but help to get back on our feet. DH and I have had a string of bad luck resulting in multiple unexpected bills which have led to the situation we are now in and I would really appreciate some advice on getting out of it… finances listed below:

Help to buy ISA: £28,000
Current account: £200
Credit card: -£2500
Loan from family member: -£2,500

I have a private pension that I have paid £4,000 into, which now has a value of just over £5,000. Should I take the money out of this and pay off some debt?

Im 38 years old and feel embarrassed by the mess we are in. Please help.

OP posts:
Catpuss66 · 18/02/2026 21:04

Money saving expert have a long running debt free thread on the forum they will aid & support you.

3girlsmama · 18/02/2026 21:14

In the short-term could you do a clear out of items you don't use and sell via Vinted, local pages etc. It could generate a little extra cash.

Namechangerage · 18/02/2026 22:56

ShameSames · 17/02/2026 12:21

We haven’t added to the ISA for a number of months now, due to the unexpected bills. I have just had a pay rise of £300 per month, which will be a huge help. But I won’t start being paid at the higher rate until end of March. DH’s pay is variable, dependent on volume of work. My take home pay is currently £1,500 per month.

Can you sell some stuff on Vinted? Helps me during tight months!

Bjorkdidit · 19/02/2026 04:24

OldBurt · 18/02/2026 20:06

You're only penalised the amount you got as a bonus, so you haven't really lost anything.

Take £3k out and pay off the credit card. Then pay off family member once you get your pay rise. Then start saving again.

That's for the Lifetime ISA. If you actually have the old-style Help To Buy ISA as you said in your original post, there's no point in having more than £12K in it, because the maximum bonus is £3K. You wouldn't lose anything withdrawing from that.

Not true, if you take money out of a LISA you lose 6.25% of the money you put in.

However if it was used to pay off expensive debt it could be worth it, depending on circumstances.

Peridoteage · 19/02/2026 06:06

£1,500 a month pay seems low, its not even minimum wage for full time work? Even after tax minimum wage is 20k for 37.5 hours a week. If you aren't working full time, up your hours?

If your DH work isn't reliable would he be better off changing to something more predictable?

supersop60 · 19/02/2026 07:33

goz · 17/02/2026 12:33

You can withdraw from the help to buy or LISA.
If you’re spending on a credit card and also paying interest on a balance it might make sense.

If you withdraw from the LISA you also have to pay the govt back their contribution. Dont do it.

Pondering2026 · 19/02/2026 10:59

Haven't read the full thread but a friend of mine got £800 for three rings last week as the price of gold is at an all time high. Do you have any unused old jewellery you can cash in? I will be doing so imminently!

Sishere · 19/02/2026 11:00

Do you have any kids? Any savings for them that you can temporarily plunder?

lilkitten · 19/02/2026 11:29

My pension I can't withdraw anything until 55, but I was able to pause payments when I had a tough time. Better to see if you can do that, and pause adding to the ISA too

lilkitten · 19/02/2026 11:31

Pondering2026 · 19/02/2026 10:59

Haven't read the full thread but a friend of mine got £800 for three rings last week as the price of gold is at an all time high. Do you have any unused old jewellery you can cash in? I will be doing so imminently!

Yes I'm a jeweller, very high at the moment. Most customers I'm seeing right now are scrapping. Shop around for prices - we have people ring ahead to ask our price

usernamealreadytaken · 19/02/2026 13:44

ShameSames · 17/02/2026 12:21

We haven’t added to the ISA for a number of months now, due to the unexpected bills. I have just had a pay rise of £300 per month, which will be a huge help. But I won’t start being paid at the higher rate until end of March. DH’s pay is variable, dependent on volume of work. My take home pay is currently £1,500 per month.

Do you have a student loan or other deduction from your wages? If not, the take home you've quoted is less than a full time min wage job, so can you go full time?

SheIsMyMother · 19/02/2026 13:46

usernamealreadytaken · 19/02/2026 13:44

Do you have a student loan or other deduction from your wages? If not, the take home you've quoted is less than a full time min wage job, so can you go full time?

Several of us have asked but the OP is nowhere to be seen.

EuclidianGeometryFan · 19/02/2026 13:47

ShameSames · 17/02/2026 12:04

I know it sounds manageable, but I’m very stressed because we have only £200 available cash. Im living off a credit card which isn’t 0% (long story but can’t apply for one right now, so we’re stuck with that).

That £200 should be more than enough to last until the end of the month if it is just food shopping you need.

What does it have to cover?
Do you need to buy petrol?
Are any more direct debits going out before payday?
Write down all the things that you need to spend before next payday - school lunch fees? Children's activity fees?
Then calculate what you have left, and stay out of the shops. Each day that you spend nothing is a small victory.
Eat from the freezer or store cupboard, forget topping up the fridge with fresh food.

It is always easier to reduced spending than to increase income.
Do a budget.

The first hurdle is mentally and emotionally realising that you are poorer than you feel you ought to be. Your lifestyle is not what you expected and is certainly lower than it was a few years ago for comparable income.
Things that you "deserve" or "should" be able to have are simply out of reach. Things that you feel should be "normal" expenditure for your family have to be cut or cut back.
You need to accept a new normal.

Then, when you have adjusted mentally, keeping to a planned budget will be easier.

Quine0nline · 19/02/2026 13:56

If you can get hold of Dave Ramsay's book it's really helpful on getting out of debt. It's us based but debt is debt. Also any book by Any Dayczion of the tightwad gazette is good too.

YourWinter · 19/02/2026 14:50

Go onto the moneysavingexpert forum and join Debt Free Wannabe. You’ll get immeasurable support, advice and suggestions from people who understand, and can help, all anonymous. It will change your life.

Jopo12 · 19/02/2026 15:07

Here's some structure to a plan. I hope it helps.

  1. you need a budget. Someone has given you a link above to moneyhelper. You can also look at Money Saving Expert, and there's a forum there full of people trying to live below their means and pay off debt so you will find lots of help.

  2. then you need a plan for short, mid and long term financial security. Short term must be cash, you know at some point your car will die, your roof will need to be replaced, your boiler will go bang, you pet will need expensive healthcare. Or if you're on temporary work contract or zero hours, or you lose your job, you need ready cash available to tide you over to your next job. Aim to have 3-6 months of expenditure in an easy access ISA savings account.
    For mid term, use a fixed rate cash ISa account for another 3-6 months of expenditure, or as as you have a specific plan to buy a house, the help to buy ISA is fine,but it locks your money away so you can't use it for the emergencies, which is the position you are in now.
    So your priority should be building a short-term cash cushion before locking money away to buy a house.

For long term use your pension especially if you get employer contribions.

  1. you have £28k in an ISA so there was no need to get into debt. Please don't put any more on this until you have paid off your debt, and built your short term cash savings. It must be so frustrating knowing you have money in there but it would cost you too much to use it to pay off the debt!

  2. once you've done your budget,and don't forget to include the annual expenses that might not be on your last 6 months worth of bank transactions, start cutting back on everything but essentials. How much disposable income can you free up?

  3. over pay the credit card as much as possible as this will be an expensive debt. Once that's paid, build up at least £1000 in your emergency fund. Finally, pay off the family debt by splitting your disposable cash between that and adding more to the savings account.

  4. once you've cleared the debt and got 3 months of expenses sitting in the bank, then you can start building up your house deposit again.

Chinsupmeloves · 19/02/2026 17:41

You won't be able to take from your pension i don't think but, from an older lady, it's best to keep this going.

In situations like this you just have to really tighten the purse strings and aim to chip away at the debts bit by bit. O% credit cards for your visa debt, agreeing a manageable amount to pay back others. Xx

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