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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to prefer a chef over a cleaner?

41 replies

EuclidianGeometryFan · 13/02/2026 13:06

If you could employ ONE person for your home, which would you pick:

Cleaner
Laundry-person
Housekeeper, for admin/shopping/dealing with trades/tidying etc. not cleaning
Day-nanny (daytime plus either early morning or after school, but not both)
Gardener & DIY person
Personal trainer or health worker to come to your house 7 days
Chef for up to 7 evening meals

OP posts:
TheBogPeople · 13/02/2026 23:22

Cleaner. Even floors only would improve my life immeasurably as things stand just now.

understandyourdilemma · 13/02/2026 23:28

Oblivionnnnn · 13/02/2026 23:18

I’ve downsized and cleaning a smaller place I’d actually a pleasure.

So I’ll take someone to do my hair and make up every day instead please!

Agree with the ease of cleaning a smaller place. But also a place with no other occupants. Whenever I've been on my own I've done my own cleaning. Whenever I've been in a relationship I / we have had a cleaner. I won't clean up after anyone else (except my dc) and I won't allow different standards of cleaning to become a relationship issue.

Dagda · 13/02/2026 23:29

definitely a laundry person. But they would to wash, dry and fold and iron the minimum that needs it and put it away. Critically they would need to fold and organise the socks per person.

i feel like that service doesn’t even exist but I would happily pay a lot for it.

macshoto · 14/02/2026 00:18

We employ a cleaner and a gardener (as we have a couple of acres of garden). If I had to give up one, it would probably be the gardener.

If money was no object, I would certainly have a private chef, but not my first choice.

Idutp · 14/02/2026 01:08

Cleaner but the housekeeper is seriously tempting, trying to contact and book in tradesmen in (and then repeat when they don’t turn up) is the bane of my existence right now

Original poster
EuclidianGeometryFan · 15/02/2026 07:40

Middlechild3 · 13/02/2026 13:07

Cleaner who cooks

I can see you are a rule-breaker 😀

OP posts:
Original poster
EuclidianGeometryFan · 15/02/2026 07:42

nowahousewife · 13/02/2026 13:23

Who decides the menu and shops for the food?

Edited

Chef.
Housekeeper would only shop for the regular basics and a list of other things you prepare.

OP posts:
Original poster
EuclidianGeometryFan · 15/02/2026 07:42

dudsville · 13/02/2026 20:38

What if we all club to together and get one each day of the week?

Smart thinking.
But no, it is against the rules.

OP posts:
Original poster
EuclidianGeometryFan · 15/02/2026 07:44

Minesril · 13/02/2026 22:08

can I have a chauffeur?

my house is tiny so not that hard to keep clean. I get a Gousto box so I don’t think about meal planning. I quite like gardening. But I don’t drive and would love a nice car that someone else drives!

Yes, a person who is not listed in the OP is fine.

OP posts:
Original poster
EuclidianGeometryFan · 15/02/2026 07:47

JustGiveMeReason · 13/02/2026 22:35

Chef - as long as they were responsible for planning and shopping.

The chef will only shop for the main items needed, like the meat, veg, and specialist ingredients.
The will expect you to keep the cupboards stocked with basics, and of course they won't be buying your loo rolls, dishwasher tabs, etc. etc., so you will still need to go shopping and monitor the cupboards.

OP posts:
Harrietsaunt · 15/02/2026 07:48

You missed out Chauffeur. I bloody hate driving.

fatcat2007 · 15/02/2026 07:51

I have a cleaner and a nanny, but if I had to give one up it would be the cleaner. I wouldn’t be able to work without the childcare due to my child’s Sen.
If the game is I get to pick another I’d love a PT.

Original poster
EuclidianGeometryFan · 15/02/2026 07:51

understandyourdilemma · 13/02/2026 23:15

Already have a cleaner (so that's clearly a priority).

Meal planning, shopping, cooking - I do that and like it
Admin - I do it. Don't particularly like it but I'm organised and efficient and it gets done. Some specific bits I delegate to dh (so he remembers that travel insurance etc doesn't take care of itself!)

Laundry - dh does it 95% of the time. I don't think he enjoys it (not like I enjoy cooking) but it's become 'his' task. ditto unloading the dishwasher 80% of the time. Neither of us iron very much.

What we both need is a maintenance project manager - someone who does (or arranges) DIY tasks, and finds and manages trades people. We are both hopeless at even the most monor DIY tasks, and have no interest in it. And we are so vulnerable to being fleeced by rookie trades people.

If I had lots of money I'd love to have a holistic health / tai chi / yoga / personal trainer come to the house every day... What a dream!

A housekeeper could be your maintenance project manager, but only if you gave them clear instructions of what you wanted, e.g. 'a set of oak-coloured bookshelves on this wall'.
Then the housekeeper would do other stuff like sort out parcels, tidying, any other admin

Otherwise you would need an interior-designer & project manager who could see what was needed and just do it for you.

OP posts:
Original poster
EuclidianGeometryFan · 15/02/2026 07:53

Oblivionnnnn · 13/02/2026 23:18

I’ve downsized and cleaning a smaller place I’d actually a pleasure.

So I’ll take someone to do my hair and make up every day instead please!

That is one I didn't think of.
Your wish is granted.

OP posts:
Dragonflytamer · 15/02/2026 08:27

Surely a cleaner is a basic? Even the person that runs the cleaning company I use has a cleaner? No one cleans for themselves. I'd say the Gardner is the most important next role. A cook has become less important now that deliveroo has so many options.

Ferro · 15/02/2026 08:40

Morepositivemum · 13/02/2026 13:09

God a cleaner definitely here. But it would have to be someone who didn’t mind tidying too as most of my life is tidying!

I feel like this too. If I could actually get and keep my house tidy the actual cleaning wouldn't take very long!

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