My DS10 has gone to the same after school club for years. There is a person who oversees the kids (I’ll call him John). John also helps out at school sometimes, but I don’t know him beyond saying hello at pick up. DS came home uncharacteristically quiet tonight and then broke down in floods of tears tonight. He told me some things which concern me. I’m in two minds whether to raise w the club leader or leave it, in case I’m overreacting / John is vindictive.
so the kids use a two story building and playground for asc, higher years on the upper floor. DS couldn’t find a free chair near his friends to sit and read, so he picked up a chair to move it and accidentally dropped the chair. John ran up to see what the issue was and accused DS of throwing the chair. DS (and his friends) explained that he was moving but John insisted it must have been thrown. A couple of the girls agreed it had been thrown (just causing drama). However it would be really out of character for my DS to throw a chair - he’s a really quiet, helpful little boy, he’s never had so much as a warning for poor behaviour.
John then told the entire ASC that they would have to all go out in the rain and no one could be indoors due to DS. This meant DS was completely ostracised. DS started crying as he went downstairs. John then told him he couldn’t play football in the playground with the others until he ‘sorted himself out’
am I being unreasonable, or does this seem a strangely aggressive way to react to an accidentally dropped chair? DS is so upset and doesn’t want to go back to ASC. After some probing, he mentioned John sometimes condones rough games in the playground, or tells kids off for crying if they fall over/ get hurt. I’d like to say something to the ASC leader but if John is so reactive, I don’t want him to start picking on DS. I work full time and need ASC for wrap around, DS can’t walk himself home yet (difficult route home)