To think people should control their children?

[grassfedhedgehog]

Am I the only one who thinks parenting has gone down the drain lately?

I was on a busy rush hour train home after work today and two parents with their two children made me rage internally They were all sat in seats two opposite two (london overground, the seats were opposite over the middle aisle) and the bit of floor not occupied by people or bags was being used to push toy truck back and forth between them. Kids kept getting up too leaving seats unoccupied barring their bags for minutes at a time (busy train, no spare seats). Saw one poor lady get her arm used as a road briefly for the truck. The parents seemed entirely disinterested in the kids and more interested in their phones.

AIBU to think the standard of parenting as plummeted lately? Especially in public?

Yanbu. I always bring our special travelling straight-jacket for my child. Doesn’t stop him talking to other passengers, though…

Get a grip. Kids playing with a toy truck and not faces buried in technology just to shut them up would be a delightful site for most.

Kids today!

said no one ever.

Plating with a truck on the floor seems fine and using an arm as a road? Many (most) would think that sweet unless they were aggressive and hurt the person. Getting up repeatedly might be annoying if they were getting in people’s way. Shrieking bothers me far more than a couple kids entertaining themselves either a toy.

What age were the children?

I'm lucky I don't have to take my pre-schoolers on a train at peak hour. They would absolutely behave horribly.

No, I wouldn't let them use other passengers arms for their truck...
But standing and playing? Were they being particularly disruptive?

If so I'm happy to parent, but the alternative is them crying and screaming, so make your choice I guess....

I think most people would agree that they need to keep their own children under control?

Well I wouldn’t have allowed mine to touch strangers or get in the way but if they’re not in the way then playing with their toys on the floor is preferable to many other things they could have been doing. Like running around shrieking or watching Peppa pig at full volume without headphones.

Phones and the inability to not check them every fucking second of every fucking day will be the downfall of us all.

I dunno, I think the whole "poor parenting, control your children" narrative is partly a result of some parents not doing so, and partly fuelled by an increasing intolerance of people being people in public places.

I was expecting violence or chaos!

I don't understand what's really wrong here: They were all sat in seats two opposite two (london overground, the seats were opposite over the middle aisle) and the bit of floor not occupied by people or bags was being used to push toy truck back and forth between them. Kids kept getting up too leaving seats unoccupied barring their bags for minutes at a time (busy train, no spare seats).

This sounds annoying but very brief: Saw one poor lady get her arm used as a road briefly for the truck.

AIBU to think the standard of parenting as plummeted lately? Especially in public? People have said this every generation since the dawn of time, but the example you give just seems like a minor episode of children existing?

When mine were toddlers on public transport, usually at rush hour, I tended to weigh up whether other people would prefer my child to scream and cry the whole journey or push a truck around on the floor. Other people must have been more compassionate in those days as we got a lot of smiles and conversation. There isn't much choice when you have to get home and rely on public transport. You control young children by occupying them with toys like this, and trying to avoid them throwing a tantrum in a small crowded space rather than tying them to a seat. When you do this every day it's pretty exhausting and if I manage to sit down in that situation I'd be on my phone catching up with emails and admin too. Might not get another chance that day.

They were just playing with a toy truck ?!
get a grip. Children have a right to exist and play. They weren’t hurting anyone.

I agree, have seen a fair few cases of lax and poor parenting and I mean the type where they just don't look, notice or care. If challenged you will get a vulgar mouthful, so sad.

One particular time a Mum of 3 daughters was with her Mum on holiday. She disappeared from her sunbed for hours to hook up with a bloke and left her DM to look after the kids, who fell asleep for hours every day.

Fortunately (for them) they had made friends with our DC so we, as 2 couples, supervised them all. It seemed to be the case they assumed we would look out for them. It was stressful, we felt responsible and had to tell the youngest to be careful, same age as our DC who we didn't let out of our sight!

When we went to go off and do other things it was awful, waking GM up to say we're going then see her fall back asleep. When we saw the Mum and told her when we saw her on the night she was so pissed hanging off the arm of the hotel agonis giggling.

Just don't understand how anyone couldn't care less about the safety of their kids. Xx

Lucky you.

Every day is Funday on the MTA.

I can't get over you're complaining about kids playing with toy trucks on the subway. Although here, getting down on the floor could be a health hazard.

Is this the weekly 'kids today' thread?

Unfortunately too many parents find their mobile phones much more interesting then their kids.

Having a truck that's been all round the floor of a train driven across your arm is absolutely disgusting.

But no criticising other people's children on MN. I guess people identify with parents that can't be bothered too much.

Oh no children playing with toys. Disgusting!

Eh no. That’s a low bar for acceptable behaviour. Children screaming and running around in cafes and on trains is not better than letting them watch a bit of Peppa or having them look out the window. Or bring a book to read.

Not delightful when in OP’s case, paying adults are standing while children pose a tripping hazard and take up 2 seats.

I have a nightmare 4yo but I actually try to parent him in public.

If they were ‘controlled’ by bangles to a phone you’d judge that too wouldn’t you? They weren’t doing any harm.

It doesn't sound like they were screaming or running around, though.

What are you talking about? OP has not said anything about screaming and running around.

(If your 4yo is happy to read a book quietly at 5-6pm after a full day at nursery/school, then you don't know what a "nightmare" child is).

So the parents brought a toy to keep their child occupied. They played on an unoccupied floor space. Were not jumping off the seats, running up and down, shouting or screaming. Yes they shouldn't have used someone's arm to play on. But overall were under control.
I feel as a society we are moving back to the children should be seen and not heard ways. To me children play, have fun, see the joy in everyday life.

Two children playing quietly on a train? Heavens, whatever next!

I personally would not want my arm/ sleeve used as a road if the toy truck in question had been pushed along the dirty floor of a train carriage though.

I wouldn’t let my child use another persons arm as a track, I can see why that would be annoying, but I think playing with a toy on a train is completely fine. I’d rather see that than see a quiet child on a tablet