To think I should always drive?

[empee47]

I rarely drink alcohol and if I’m driving I don’t touch it at all - absolutely none, not a small glass, nothing. There’s a group of us who meet a few times a year - mother and baby group but kids are now 13 - and I usually drive due to no public transport and not wanting to pay for taxi. I am sure - before I’m asked - that there is no public transport as I live in a very rural area. It’s always assumed by a lot of the others that I’ll provide a taxi home since I have the car anyway and some expect me to swing by and drive them there too. AIBU to say that actually I don’t always want to drive? I shouldn’t always feel put upon, always be the one to have to struggle to park, park in town where car is likely to get damaged by drunks etc.

If you all originated from the same mother and baby group, how to they get to the place you are meeting?

YANBU to not want to give others a lift but it’s not something that would bother me as I don’t drink and typically drive.

They shouldnt presume a lift home. Op I found if I drove once I do it next time it was presumed. But nice to share it out someone do it next time.

I don’t really understand, you drive because you don’t want to pay for a taxi but you also don’t want to drive. What do you want to happen?

I don’t understand what you are asking here? You say AIBU to not want to drive but at the same time there is no public transport? So surely if you want to go you need to drive? The lift thing is secondary to that.

I understand completely @empee47 . When you don't drink other people always assume you will drive. I don't drink but don't always want to drive.
Don't allow people to take advantage of your good nature and suggest others take their turn from now on.

Do you want someone else to drive, so you can have a drink? If so YANBU.
However, if you’re driving anyway, the kind thing to do would be to give some of your friends a lift, assuming that you like them, and want to stay friends.

Assume you’re saying that you want one of the others to offer to drive and drop you home for a change. Nothing wrong with that. Guess they have just assumed you will do it. Just message and ask if anyone else is driving as you’d like to have a drink. See if anyone offers.

Your post is a but confusing. If you don't want to drive then don't, that's your choice but what do you want to happen instead? Is it that you want to meet where you live, which others aren't going to do if there is no transport or you want to drive yourself but not give lifts?

It’s totally fine to be clear beforehand that whilst you’re going to be driving, you don’t want to go out of your way to collect people or drop them home so they’ll need to make other arrangements.

If you’ve never actually said anything then friends are just going to assume you don’t mind doing this favour every few months so that you can all meet up.

I’m not sure of the relevance of the bit about not liking having to find parking or leave your car in town. If you don’t want to take a taxi, you have to do that regardless of who is in the car with you.

You shouldn’t feel obligated to be giving your friends lifts every time you go out
but equally they’re not obligated to have to drive if they’d like a drink simply because you don’t want to drive and there’s no public transport

Why don't you all take it in turns if you all live close enough for you to be able to pick them up/drop them off when you are driving. Just make that clear from now on - you don't need to give a reason, nothing to do with drinking or not drinking - just equally sharing the logistics. Oh and those being given a lift need to give the driver petrol money too.