AIBU to have a little woe is me post?

[garthce]

Just popped on for for vent. I’m bloody exhausted 😭

I work 32 hours a week, so not quite full time - but still 4.5 days.

my husband had an accident last month which means he cannot work as he has a manual job. The medication he is on means he cannot drive so I’m left to do all school runs. I have always dropped them off, he has always picked them up. I now spending my “break” picking the kids up then running around prepping dinner so it’s ready for a reasonable time.

I then finish work, sort the kids (which he does help with ) then I log back into work to do overtime as he only gets SSP and it’s a big struggle for us on just my normal wage.

i know some people are fully on their own so I am probably BU but just wanted to have a little whinge

When is he going back to work?

Is he so incapacitated that he can’t prepare dinner at least?

Surely he can prep dinner? Even with an injury there are ways around it, like if he cannot stand for a certain period of time etc. Can he do more around the house generally now that he's not working? Again, doesn't need to be anything overly exerting, he can take it slow, but there must be stuff he can to help share the load a bit more? Will he recover in time and return to work?

No idea, he cannot do his job with the medication he is on so it depends how long he relies on this.

he is helping with dinner where he can but some days he is barely able to move with the pain he gets

he is helping when he’s able in fairness to him

Stick at it, you are doing a great job. It's not easy that's for sure.

I'm sure hubby is feeling pretty useless but it does sound like he is doing all he can in the situation.

Hope normality resumes soon for you all

Of course you can have a whinge!.

I'd join you but you'd be bored after a sentence!!

Are we talking weeks, months, years??

what is the med?

So sorry to hear this. You‘ve got uncertainty, financial worries and worry about DH. Not to mention the inevitable change in routine, and the added responsibility. Horrible.

After DH‘s knee op, we did Hello Fresh for a couple of weeks. We got the 50% discount by signing up with a new email address. DH chose the meals and prepared them. As each meal is in a bag, he didn’t have to walk around collecting ingredients. Instead, he’d grab the bag and sit at the kitchen table doing prep in stages as he could. The food was something to look forward to and it took away the whole mental load of meal planning and dashing out for missing ingredients.

Good luck!

If he was that seriously injured, is he doing physical therapy and rehab to regain function? Does he have a pain management plan to get him off strong meds that prevent him from working and driving and possible dependence? He really needs to move around every so often to prevent complications from bedrest.

It's ok to whinge! That sounds very intense, especially when you are not used to it. You'll get through it, just keep going. Nothing else you can do but soldier on.

What medication is he on out of interest?

Sorry you are having such a hard time OP.

I hope your DH makes a good recovery .- the situation doesn't sound much fun for him either.

Of course you are entitled to have a whinge when things are so full on and stressful.

Wishing you a speedy return to normality.

You have no idea how long very strong medication he will be on for an serious injury that leaves him unable to work and barely move on some days.

@garthce - have you actually been present at any of the medical discussions with him? Because I’m getting a whiff of BS from his situation. An injury as bad as what you describe - he’d have been given a pain management plan, physio and NO WAY would he be prescribed very strong prescription only pain relief for an injury on an indefinite basis

We all need a good vent / bitch / woe is me session every now and then.

Sorry things are tough and youre finding it hard. Take comfort in the fact that this is not forever. He will get better and things will go back to the way they were. do you have a rough date?? It always helps to know things will end and when to expect that.

Is it some sort of painkiller that he’s on? Surely he can help out at home more - I am on tramadol and Cocodamol (not together at the same time) for lupus and bladder related pain and if I didn’t make my dc food / clean / do stuff round the house as and when I can nothing would ever get done.

Of course they’ll always be people in worse situations, but you are allowed to speak about how you feel! Sounds really tough OP, I can’t offer any advice but I hope your situation improves or you can get some more support.

Very entitled to have a 'woe is me' post - this sounds like a tough situation for you. I hope your husband feels better soon and that things improve for you. Have you looked into claiming UC, seeing as he's only on SSP?