To not want to be be involved in planning this!

[HomeAloneToo]

DH and DSS have been on a 3.5 trip overseas to have a holiday together and to see family who live abroad.
They are due home this weekend, DSS is getting picked up by his GF and going straight to her’s. They land early Sunday morning and we are all back at uni / work Monday. DH suggested we do something that day - because it’s been the longest we’ve been apart, we’ve both missed each other. I stupidly asked today what were the plans for Sunday, so I could maybe treat myself to something new etc
That lead to loads of questions, where do you want to go, what do you want to do, is there anywhere we haven’t been. I honestly couldn’t care if we go to the pub for a pint - I just want him to arrange it!
AIBU and needy, or should I just plan it so I get to do something I actually want to do!

Does anything actually need arranging?

What would be your favourite thing to do on Sunday? A meal? Pub? Something else? If you leave it to him then you might end up doing something you don’t want to do. None of it needs anything more than booking a table or a ticket that takes minutes.

I honestly couldn’t care if we go to the pub for a pint I just want him to arrange it

If you told him this and said "great let's go to the pub then" would you actually be happy with that?

You sound hard work

I don’t see the issue -
it sounds like you want to punish him for being away with his son and now he has to make it up to you.

Just bat it back to him ‘I don’t mind what we do, just let me know the time and place and I will be there xx’

I wouldn’t be organising at home events while I’m abroad on holiday. If you’re at home I’d say it makes sense for you to do it. And he does it next time.

Then tell him that

Why? He's on his way back from holiday, what's do difficult about saying let's go for a walk and a pizza?

Do you usually rely on your husband to make decisions for you?

3 and a half week I presume?

Why can’t he make her feel loved and special?

I wondered this too.
Exactly what isa 3.5 trip ,??

What's the issue?

A natural follow up question to "let's do something" is "what do you want to do?"

Seems perfectly reasonable, and it seems that your answer is "go to the pub". So just say that.

Well just say that then....

Guessing 3 and a half week trip...

He can. This isn’t the time or occasion for him to organise

He’s the one that suggested doing something when he got back! So yes, he can pull his finger out.

What if he then says:

What pub shall we go to?
What time should we go?
Do we need to book a table?
Are we going to eat or just have drinks?
Shall we drive or get a uber?
etc

I suspect what OP wants is to not be the one thinking about every facet of an outing that was suggested by her (presumably capable) partner for once. He could just as easily say "right, I booked a table for dinner at at the Old Oak, car is coming at 6.30".

I didnt need you to explain that. I was asking the OP if she would be happy with it (because like many responders I suspect there was more to it)

Maybe he also doesn't want to have to plan after being away for 3.5 weeks?

Don't let his homecoming turn into a top trumps "who has to do more organising" just say you are happy with the local pub at 3pm for a drink and leave it at that. If he wants different, let him sort it

What a bizarre response. You claim to miss him yet the very first thing you've done is kick up a fuss and cause a divide. I can't help thinking that if he'd had have suggested what to do, you'd have kicked off about not being asked.

And what's the treating yourself bit about? Surely if you miss him, the point is to see him?

You're being very odd.

Then he shouldn't suggest it

Why?

If I don't want to do something then I just don't do it. However, I am generally happy to just suit myself at weekends so don't care if nothing gets organised. If I did care, then I would use my words and say what I actually wanted.

He doesn’t owe you a favour because he went away this own son for a couple of days. You are behaving as if he needs to make it up to you because you generously allowed him a treat.

Stop acting like a diva.

Why would DH organising the night out HE wants be a favour to OP?

Do you just see organising as a woman's job?