To be really worried now about screen time

[MaggieBsBoat]

Just saw this on LinkedIn. Has anyone know more about this. Brain health is so important. I thought it worth sharing…

https://www.linkedin.com/posts/safescreenscampaign_this-powerful-short-film-from-10-news-ugcPost-7426695827194023936-drUs?utm_medium=ios_app&rcm=ACoAAANUsm0BQbFkm1K5mrJCwDS7lKDhhvnLTQ8&utm_source=social_share_video_v2&utm_campaign=copy_link

I hate hate hate this- how are children going to learn about the world if no one engages them with it? I also hate to see parents pushing their child in a buggy, glued to a phone with ear buds in, totally ignoring the child who is chatting away. TALK TO YOUR FUCKING CHILD! No wonder schools are reporting such a huge number of children with speech and language delays.

@Terip If they’re in a restaurant or it’s a family meal, they shouldn’t be on screens unless there is some kind of medical issue. They should be present and engaged with the people they’re sitting with, learning to act like an adult

But they are not adults, they are children, they need to work up to acting like adults. When mine were young, if we went to dinner, we would be sensible and keep it early, suitable ‘family style’ places, and brief (not 3 courses) BUT we would also take colouring books, sticker books, small Thomas travel play set (the size of a place mat), as the reality is that toddlers, young kids are not adults and cannot be made to act as such. As they get older use of such tools tapers off. To be honest, I don’t really see how the things we used in such a situation differs to today’s use of screens in the same situation. We made them pack up to actually eat, but before and after their food we were okay with them being occupied by the stuff we took🤷‍♀️. They are adults now, and can sit just fine in restaurants, none of it seemed to have harmed them.

I’ve worked with children for years and it’s completely apparent who is spending a lot of time on iPads and who is not.

I totally agree with OP to the point I don't even own a tablet and my kids aren't allowed to play on my phone. They are really good at playing with toys, love the park etc. However my children are also behind at school and one of them especially has many of the problems and behaviours associated with excessive screen time. Her teacher said to me a version of the above quote, implying my dd is this way as she's spent way too much time on the ipad. She's never used a tablet in her life. Meanwhile my friends kids watch tablets half the day and are doing well. So can you really tell? I just don't know now.

Did you ignore them while they were colouring, or talk to them whilst keeping them calm/still with colouring?

That's the difference.

We've recently started streaming old shows from itvx with the adverts. Its been eye opening to go back to alloted break times. We both immediately reach for phones and sometimes find myself itching for a phone break after just a few minutes, but I think that's normal because I read someone where breaking an activity to use a phone takes 20 minutes to fully reabsorbed you.

My unapologetic and very dramatic view is that smart devices are the work of the devil for addiction 😆😈

Everything in moderation, including screens. If the kids are never doing anything but having screen time yes that would be a problem but most kids have school then sports, reading, dinner, homework, bathtime and a bit of screen time in the middle of all that is hardly the end of the world.

Oh we all know that it is detrimental to out children but many parents tell themselves that everybody puts their DC in front of CBeebies / tablet at a restaurant / a bit of tv in the morning / screen time before bedtime / … so it is fine.

There was a thread recently where people were justifying have the tv on when DC were getting ready for school - and lots of posters were saying it was fine, some even saying they couldn’t do it without it.

I’ll answer as I did the same with mine not that long ago: we did a mix of ignoring them (ie try to have an adult conversation) and talking to them.

I personally feel like i have damaged my own attention span by using screens too much so I can fully believe the video that the OP posted.

My kids are only 4 and 1 so they aren’t allowed screen time with the exception of the occasional sports match or olympics performance, which they’ll only watch a few minutes of anyway. The older one is occasionally shown videos at school unfortunately, but they are documentary-style animal videos so won’t be having such a strong effect on her dopamine levels.

My friend has raised her kid on video games and low and behold she is now getting assessed for adhd. what is the difference between adhd and a brain damaged from long term gaming? i can’t understand why, if you think your family have a tendency towards adhd, she would do that to them. I believe there is a lot of undiagnosed adhd in my family which is why i am so strict with my own children.

Absolutely agree. Like PP I can feel the effects on myself so god knows what it does to a developing brain. The short reel, instant attention grab, scroll every 5 sec things are the worst (social media, YouTube etc).

I really think that screen time (and social media especially) will be the next cigarettes and junk food. In 20 years’ time our kids will blame us for allowing them to mess up their brains. Even though they begged for more screen time at the time.

Unfortunately I am very unpopular with DD13 for having fairly strict screen limits - but I am sticking to my guns because I really believe it is best for her in the long run. It’s hard.

If you have a toddler or primary age child then having screen time limits is comparatively easy, pandemics aside.

I spend a lot of my professional life teaching about infant brain development.

I've always been tight with screen time, really restricted gaming and restricted phones. I only took time limits and parental controls off after GCSEs. My oldest hated it, he was always trying to sneak devices in to his room, hack the parental controls etc. we always found out and he eventually learned to put up with it because of he was caught we would confiscate his phone completely.

He is now an adult and a youth group leader and has completely come around and voluntarily told me that he understands why I did it and that he agrees with me.

Screens have a lot to answer for.

I think we do similar.
They do have the tv on, but no iPads.

I think I’ll probably limit the switch for my eldest as that’s ’interactive screen time’.

I’ve seen young kids with their DM on a long bus ride and the kid has just been handed a phone for the entire journey. Yes it’s easier to do this but if you actually interact with your child it’s not that hard to do, read a book or play. These mums seemed to not be the ones you’d think are allowing screen time unl unlimited. On a train commute I often saw kids reading with their parents, that’s what you should be doing. Not hard, even on a crowded train.

this has also occurred to me.
I would also bet there’s a link between screen time as children and ADHD.

Even TV - modern children’s programs have so many frames per second and the animations have insane levels of colour saturation; I find it unwatchable. I suspect this is also damaging to their brain development. I would not be at all surprised if there was a link proven in future. Don’t even get me started on iPads!! No child under 12 should be on an iPad - ever, for anything. I think it’s utterly shit parenting and I do judge when I see that in restaurants / cars / prams etc.

That’s just lazy parenting plonking the kids in front of a tv or screen then. You could easily hand them a school book or even colouring book and get them to do this. Kids get used to and then expect screens. I can see with relatives who don’t allow screen time much and it’s telling.

You’ll have people coming on in a sec to say that for their ND child an iPad is essential especially when out in public. What did we do before iPads?! Interacted of course!

I always think , treat it like ‘TV’.
same restrictions.

My nephew had a phone put in his face WHILE OPENING CHRISTMAS PRESENTS on Christmas Day. He’s 1 year and a bit. He was probably tired and overwhelmed hence the fussing, not something a screen should have been used to fix.

I’m so relieved that I always limited screen time for my DC. They are 17 & 14 now so obviously things are a bit different although I still limit DD14 to 2 hours a day (I don’t include watching tv together in that.)
Like pp I definitely judge other parents who allow loads of screen time, unless there are significant medical reasons I just think it’s wrong to let them watch screens while eating or in the car etc.

My DD watches TV, she’s 9 and in school or activities most of the week. I don’t therefore mind some cartoons or TV on a Friday or Saturday evening. But there have never been screens allowed in the car, at cafes or restaurants, never when she was in a pushchair or when we’re out of the house. The car is for audiobooks or games like I Spy. I’ve never allowed YouTube or gaming of any type.
During the day we play board games or have a reading time. At restaurants she engages in the conversation or does colouring or an activity book.
I don’t feel like I’ve been overly strict just done what feels sensible. Some of her friends talk about playing Roblox all day which I just can’t imagine letting happen.

This thread has made me decide to stop breakfast TV, limit the switch a bit more for the 8 year old and continue to have the iPads hidden in a cupboard ‘broken’.

What do people think of iPads on planes? It’s the only time I allow them out currently.

Just to be clear, I don’t have any issue with colouring or any aid that an adult can engage with the child about. If DD is colouring in the kids menu, an adult can talk to her about what she’s doing, help her - she’s then engaging with people at the table, she isn’t just staring at a screen, not engaging with anything or anyone other than the screen. The colouring goes away during the meal.

I do ipads on planes. I reckon if I choose to take my kids on planes, I owe it to the other passengers to put keeping the kids quiet above my own screen time qualms! We tend to have almost no screen time when actually away so that balances it out IMO. And also provides quite a good rationale for not having screen time on the holiday.

@clinellwipe I think survival mode needs to be in its own category.

That being said I'd seriously rate a yoto mini for long car journeys. We regularly do very long drives (8-15 hours) with my now 7&4 year old (no sen) and I refuse to buy a tablet of any kind, so they've been a lifesaver. You can buy make your own cards, then sign up to a digital library like borrowbox etc and download audiobooks for free.

Likewise for plane journeys @onatRainN and @minipie. The yoto works for us 😊they get super excited whenever they see a screen in the back of the seat in front, it's a real treat. Have to say the decision to put interactive games on them is interesting though as they often involve prodding the screen which surely must be annoying if that's your seat?!

Psychiatrists know how to tell the difference. Although I do agree that the behaviour looks similar.

Both might have short attention spans at school, but the kid who actually does have ADHD will have a whole load of other issues that are not connected to screen use. Eg hyper mobility is common with ADHD, as is dyslexia, rejection sensitivity dysphoria, autism, hyperactivity of course, plus many many more things.