Page 5 | To be the only one to upgrade on a group trip?

Rewis · 09/02/2026 08:10

If you sister is laying for the trip then it would be a bit rude to pay for upgrade. But if your paying for your family's flights then why not especially if you are saving money. If you can afford to buy dinner one night on the holiday for your sister and her kids to 'compensate'

champagnetrial · 09/02/2026 08:11

I would not begrudge anyone an upgrade if they got the chance, it's so much better. I would love this for my sister. Why not?

And my (same age to yours) kids wouldn't mind At All. They know they are much more hardy and flexible than me (eg bendy and can sleep on a washing line). Obviously I wouldn't leave little ones.

Maybe I would measure it by the length of the flight - 5 hours plus deffo worth it. But really, if your upgrade is cheaper than the regular economy, it seems like a no-brainer (especially since you are likely paying for the kids holiday anyway?)

ChapmanFarm · 09/02/2026 08:13

You are presenting the question the wrong way round.

It's not are you unreasonable to upgrade but are you unreasonable not to pay more to downgrade.

If it was an extra cost then I can see how people might think 'just sit with us'.

But it seems madness to pay more for less.

Present it this way and say you'll use (some of) the difference for drinks at the airport, lounge access or some other token..

Soontobesingles · 09/02/2026 08:13

If you are going to do it, get a different flight. I would think it was really selfish if my sister did that on a shared holiday.

crossedlines · 09/02/2026 08:20

ChapmanFarm · 09/02/2026 08:13

You are presenting the question the wrong way round.

It's not are you unreasonable to upgrade but are you unreasonable not to pay more to downgrade.

If it was an extra cost then I can see how people might think 'just sit with us'.

But it seems madness to pay more for less.

Present it this way and say you'll use (some of) the difference for drinks at the airport, lounge access or some other token..

This.

if you were choosing to pay shed loads more to fly first class and have a lie-flat seat then it would look like you’re flaunting your wealth. In this case, it will actually cost you considerably more to fly economy it’s a a no brainer. If it were me on a group holiday, I’d think a member of the group was mad if paid a lot more just to sit in a different part of the plane- whichever way round, whether to go first or economy!

ChimpOnMyShoulder · 09/02/2026 08:46

crossedlines · 09/02/2026 08:20

This.

if you were choosing to pay shed loads more to fly first class and have a lie-flat seat then it would look like you’re flaunting your wealth. In this case, it will actually cost you considerably more to fly economy it’s a a no brainer. If it were me on a group holiday, I’d think a member of the group was mad if paid a lot more just to sit in a different part of the plane- whichever way round, whether to go first or economy!

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I don’t think there would be anything to stop her getting her ticket through her friend thereby paying less but asking for a seat in economy next to her family.

Brooklyn70 · 09/02/2026 08:54

i’m surprised at all the people saying don’t do it, i don’t even pay the extra £8 to sit next to my husband on Ryanair 😂

allthingsinmoderation · 09/02/2026 09:15

If i were in your family/group and you told me you could get a first class ticket a nominal fee id say how wonderful ,enjoy and see you on arrival.

user37597473785 · 09/02/2026 09:19

“Thanks to selfish, selfish people on the flight here that wouldn't swap seats, I had to sit with my family” 😂

I’d go for it OP!

MangosteenSoda · 09/02/2026 09:36

So your options are standby in upper, standby in economy, or buying a normal economy ticket.

If you’re pretty confident in getting on in standby, I’d do as a pp suggested: sister upgrade with her points (and you maybe split the total cost of the 2 upper class seats together), and you on standby.

I think the cousins will be fine as a group together in economy.

Neurodiversemom · 09/02/2026 09:42

You can go alone too

downtownlights · 09/02/2026 09:51

SallyDraperGetInHere · 09/02/2026 00:07

I think it’s poor form, but can’t really explain why. I go away with friends once a year, and one of our group travels a lot with work so has many perks. At the airport she splits off to do fast-track through security, and straight into the lounge, rejoining us on the plane. The rest of us are slumming it in queues and Costa. There’s nothing WRONG with it, but it strikes me as not being in the spirit of a group holiday …

And yet in our group this is all considered totally fine. Maybe because I am usually in the lounge gang 😂

alovelypatternedcarpet · 09/02/2026 10:03

Could you treat your sister by adding your costs and an upgrade for her together and then splitting 50/50? That way you both get to enjoy a more comfortable flight, and the kids will LOVE being by themselves and won't give two hoots about the cheaper seats.

FlakyRedDreamer · 09/02/2026 10:04

I would travel on a different flight.

SteelMaiden · 09/02/2026 10:10

Checkenberger · 08/02/2026 23:10

My sister is the oldest but would never dream of leaving anybody behind that's the problem 😕 I am probably the least mobile
I have quoted this comment in error, sorry
It's with Virgin

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OK - if it is Virgin it is Upper (aka Business not first as VA dont do first) Secondly unless she is very high in the company, its best available, not automatic Upper.

fungibletoken · 09/02/2026 10:10

If you were my sister I'd say crack on! Nuts for you to pay three times the price and for a much less comfortable experience. Most people do their own thing on long haul anyway - watching different films, eating/sleeping at different times - so I doubt you'll miss out on much with the group, if they'll even be sitting together anyway.

AgnesX · 09/02/2026 10:13

If you were my DH/DW I'd not be too impressed. Other members of the family, unless you were my sister and you were leaving me on my tod!) would be envious but go for it and enjoy!

SteelMaiden · 09/02/2026 10:15

Applecup · 09/02/2026 07:36

No wonder it’s so expensive to fly when free tickets are being given out to all and sundry.

Tickets are not given to all and sundry

If you work for VA you will get your immediate family on the your staff travel, you will be allowed a single friend who can travel on staff, but not with you. And if your family travel without you, you are the lowest priority to be in the better cabin.

And only if there are spare seats

QuietLifeNoDrama · 09/02/2026 10:20

Those of you saying OP would be selfish. I think you’re all selfish if you’d expect a family member to pay an inflated price just to sit with you.

Tillow4ever · 09/02/2026 11:04

AgnesX · 09/02/2026 10:13

If you were my DH/DW I'd not be too impressed. Other members of the family, unless you were my sister and you were leaving me on my tod!) would be envious but go for it and enjoy!

You could try reading just the OP’s comments first and then you’d see who she’s travelling with.

OP - given it would be so much cheaper, I’d definitely talk to your sister and tell her your dilemma. If you were my sister I’d ask why you haven’t already booked it! If I were you, I’d offer my sister the seat on the way home so that you took it in turns to be the adult in charge with the kids - but as it’s a standby ticket you obviously risk finding out there isn’t a seat available on the way back, so it would have to be you waiting for the next flight.

i know you’ve said it’s not an issue getting out there as there’s a later flight you could take (I presume when you get there they won’t have to wait for you to arrive to be able to travel to your accommodation, if they would have to wait I’d say it’s not fair to do that) what about coming home? If you had to take a different flight, is there a later one on the same day? How will your kids get home from the airport if you haven’t travelled with them? How long would they have to wait for you to get the next flight? What if there’s no space on the next one? Will you be back in time for work? If they have to wait, would that cause issues for them with school or work?

As long as you have contingencies in place for both directions of travel, it’s a no brainer really. It would be nice of you to spend the difference you save on treating you all when out there. As you said it would cost you £200 and is a third of the price, £400 should get you a meal out for the group. If that’s the price each way, an £800 saving would be crazy to pass on.

AgnesX · 09/02/2026 11:30

Tillow4ever · 09/02/2026 11:04

You could try reading just the OP’s comments first and then you’d see who she’s travelling with.

OP - given it would be so much cheaper, I’d definitely talk to your sister and tell her your dilemma. If you were my sister I’d ask why you haven’t already booked it! If I were you, I’d offer my sister the seat on the way home so that you took it in turns to be the adult in charge with the kids - but as it’s a standby ticket you obviously risk finding out there isn’t a seat available on the way back, so it would have to be you waiting for the next flight.

i know you’ve said it’s not an issue getting out there as there’s a later flight you could take (I presume when you get there they won’t have to wait for you to arrive to be able to travel to your accommodation, if they would have to wait I’d say it’s not fair to do that) what about coming home? If you had to take a different flight, is there a later one on the same day? How will your kids get home from the airport if you haven’t travelled with them? How long would they have to wait for you to get the next flight? What if there’s no space on the next one? Will you be back in time for work? If they have to wait, would that cause issues for them with school or work?

As long as you have contingencies in place for both directions of travel, it’s a no brainer really. It would be nice of you to spend the difference you save on treating you all when out there. As you said it would cost you £200 and is a third of the price, £400 should get you a meal out for the group. If that’s the price each way, an £800 saving would be crazy to pass on.

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@Tillow4ever It's like being back at school in this site sometimes. If you've nothing useful to add to my post, move on and post your own. 🙄

To everyone else mea culpa for being dense.

Tillow4ever · 09/02/2026 11:53

AgnesX · 09/02/2026 11:30

@Tillow4ever It's like being back at school in this site sometimes. If you've nothing useful to add to my post, move on and post your own. 🙄

To everyone else mea culpa for being dense.

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I was pointing out to you that your answer would have been better had you taken a minute to read the OP’s comments so that you knew it wasn’t her partner but her sister she was travelling with. And her kids. It gets really fucking tiring reading a shitload of comments that are completely irrelevant because the poster couldn’t be arsed to read the full situation.

i then went on to add my own info/response.

AgnesX · 09/02/2026 11:56

Tillow4ever · 09/02/2026 11:53

I was pointing out to you that your answer would have been better had you taken a minute to read the OP’s comments so that you knew it wasn’t her partner but her sister she was travelling with. And her kids. It gets really fucking tiring reading a shitload of comments that are completely irrelevant because the poster couldn’t be arsed to read the full situation.

i then went on to add my own info/response.

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If you're incapable of scrolling on that's your problem.

As for your post. Create your own rather than add to anything pre-existing. As opposed to being a pain in the arse.

canklesmctacotits · 09/02/2026 13:00

I think it depends where to, or rather how long the flight. If it’s overnight or longer than 8 hours I’d do it. If it’s under 8 hours I’d sit with everyone else. At least, that’s what I’d tell the group, and then I’d explain that doing this would cost me more than getting my friend to book me a seat, is it okay if I use a ticket she got me and spend the remainder on a fancy meal out for everyone at the destination?

Snakebite61 · 09/02/2026 18:19

Checkenberger · 08/02/2026 22:24

I have a group trip abroad in the plan stages with close family.
My best friend works for the same airline we are planning on booking with and has me on her staff travel plan.
I can therefore get a first class ticket for about £200 return
Would I be a horrible person to leave the rest of my family behind in steerage to enjoy a 3 course meal plus 2 lighter ones, full bar, lay down bed etc? Would i be any less a cunt to do it just one way 🤔 or should the trip just begin at the airport and stay together the whole time?

Any decent family members would say go for it. If it was one of my friends/family, I'd say I was jealous but laugh it off.