To think I retired too early

[hrenfe]

I always wanted an early retirement. I didn’t have a particularly stressful job but I didn’t enjoy it after covid as I was fully remote and my job was always at risk of being axed. It paid OK (£50k) and I had 35 days annual leave a year. No mortgage

Got offered redundancy at 58. Took it. Been retired a few years now. Whilst it’s super not to have to work, I can’t help but feel I took retirement a bit too early. Money is fine and DP (younger) still works.

However, we can’t really afford to do anything “big” that we thought we’d too in retirement. Had always imagined taking a big trip like a month in New Zealand but can’t really afford it.

Almost all of DDs friends have had big parental contributions to their weddings or big chunks of flat deposits given to them. We can’t do this. AIBU to think I should have just milked my job and worked another two years or so?

Obviously

Why don't you go back to work? Not necessarily where you were, but surely any extra income will pay for the 'bigger' stuff, if you're currently OK for money day to day?

why couldn’t you have got a part time job ?

I don't want to say you're being U or UR really. You made the decision you made with the information and feelings you had at the time. I understand why you'd have second thoughts about it now. Would it be possible to go back and offer some part time work to the company? How long ago did you retire?

There's nothing preventing you from going back to work ?

Would another two years have made much difference? I can see you might with very focused saving have been able to get enough for a big holiday in that time. You wouldn't be able to save enough for more than one of the things you talk about, though?

Did you talk your decision through with anyone at the time? Do you still have your redundancy payout?

Get another job. My grandad retired twice because he got bored the first time.

I dont see myself being able to retire before 70. Thankfully in a professional that means it is possible.

its impossible to know, OP. If you had’ve worked for another two years you would have missed out on the redundancy package. Given that, im not sure a few years would have made much of a difference to your income - however 9-10 years, to 67/68 would have.

Theres always the option of getting a new job, even part time for a few years.

don’t worry about what is done - focus on what you can do now.

Month long trips to NZ and huge money gifts to DC for big milestones are luxuries though. You could have milked the job a bit longer, but at what non-monetary cost?

I pondered suggesting there is nothing to stop you working again, but it may not be as straightforward as that. I do work with a couple of fixed term retirement returnees though, so not impossible. It doesn't sound like you want that though.

Very simply, you can't have it all. None of us can, so there will always be costs and benefits.

Get another job and go back to work then, what’s stopping you?

You say you don’t ‘have to’ work and that ‘money is fine’ but also that you can’t afford some things you’d like and say DP not DH (if not married you wouldn’t share pension / assets in the event of breaking up).

You could review your finances and options.

If you find retirement isnt what you thought it would be why not go back to work?
You could try something different to your last job.

58 is very young to be retired if you havent the financial means to take trips or help kids out.

Since your younger DH is still working why not get some kind of job and save all the wages for the big holidays when he can retire -

What did you intend to do with your early retirement? Because big trips wouldn't fill (potentially) 30+ years anyway so unless you have all-consuming pursuits like art or writing or something you want to fill your days with, I can't imagine stopping at 58 and having nothing but domestics on a budget for the rest of my days. Your job sounds like it was a good set-up, but as you didn't enjoy then it wasn't necessarily the wrong thing to take the redundancy, more the step beyond that to retire. Any reason why you can't find another job that suits you better hours and income-wise? There's no harm in pausing the retirement now you've tried it and going back to work with more of plan and save up for the big trips, contributions for kids and whatever else you'd find more fulfilling.

Definitely get another job. Go temping if you don't want to be tied down. Or pick up casual work - waitressing, bar work etc. Cut peoples grass. Bake cakes. Whatever you like to do turn it into income. Retrain if you must....you have the time. Put the money in a savings pot for New Zealand or a wedding or a flat deposit whatever extras you and dp want.
It's not too late. You are not too old.

My Father took an early retirement due to redundancy at probably a similar age. My mum (younger) continued to work her part time job.

My Dad went back to work in a post office 2-3 days a week after about 1.5yrs. They were fine for money but he was bored. He worked for another 5 years until he turned 65 and retired again.

Would you be happy to work maybe 2 days a week or some form of part time position (particularly when your partner still works) in order to put money away to fund a few trips in the future?

You're still very young. You could do something like work in a retail shop or supermarket etc perhaps? For my dad he enjoyed the social aspect but being able to just work the 9-4 or whatever hours and never think about it out of hours.

You had a job which was well paid and not overly stressful. Your partner still works. I certainly wouldn’t have given up work in that situation. Lots of people have highly stressful jobs and are not well paid, so it’s tough every single day. Go out and get a nice part time job and book your NZ holiday.

You retired at 58 and think you have problems because you can't afford an expensive trip to New Zealand?? Gosh, how the other half live.

You'll have to start working again, even part-time, if you want to afford luxury things. I would have thought that was obvious.

Will you be able to do the big trip when your state pension kicks in? That’s an extra £1200 a month. If you’re managing on your money now then you should be able to?

I may be being a bit thick but I don’t understand how working another two years would have changed your life so dramatically. If you can’t afford the big holidays now what would be so different in 2 years time?

If you not happy being retired surely the simple answer is to go back to work?

But... surely you did the calculations on how much you'd need for the lifestyle you want before you retired...?

As you can’t change redundancy now, there is no point in having regrets.
Try and remember why you wanted to retire early. You must have done your sums before accepting not working, so whilst you might not be able to go to NZ for a month yet, and wouldn’t you have to wait until DP retires for that, once you reach state pension age you will have and extra £12k+ each coming in a year. That has to make a difference.

For now though you have all the time in the world to do what you wanted to whilst you were too busy with work and child rearing. Whatever it was you wished you could be doing (aside from lengthy luxury travel) do that.

You can have active days power walking up hills, or going to the gym when it’s quiet with time to have a sauna afterwards, grow herbs and food, cook amazing meals which take longer than “after work”. Or get involved in a cause which is important to you. Learn a language, or how to paint, read your to-read pile, watch a rom-com, go bargain hunting for great clothes at charity shop prices. Join a walking netball group or tai-chi (hard to advise but assume you are fairly mobile with the desire for long distance lengthy travel).

There are many places closer than New Zealand or perhaps you could go for 2 weeks not 4 if the destination is the important thing.

You sound at a crossroads, do you want to keep all your time or do you want more money?

No point looking back look forward.

Maybe the very reason you were offered redundancy was because you were ‘milking’ your job. Certainly go back to work, but be prepared to contribute.

Every year the OP doesn't work she loses roughly £39.5k. So two years of work, nearly £80k more money into the coffers. That covers a few big holidays.