Single, no knowledge of roofs and feel I might make a financial mistake, please help?

[Rooooof]

Roof needs doing. Not hugely urgently but there’s some cracked tiles, not in a great state. It’s been on around 70 years.

Anyway… had three quotes

1. 10k (not registered for vat and will apparently bag up the few asbestos cement sheets and take them away for us… I’m cynical about this as apparently you need a licence to do this as a trader? But he’s a nice guy and local people like him
2. bigger company quoted 15k but this included vat and included a proper disposal of the cement sheets by a separate company. They also mentioned things the other guy hadn’t in terms of things to look out for when they’re on site and other bits that may need replacing like some of the timber if it’s rotten
3. next quote is a company that’s been around decades. Very positive reviews online. Quoted 22k. Very thorough, don’t have any slots to do the job until October so obviously busy.

all of them said until its falling down it’s not urgent and maybe I would get another couple
of years out of it but it was on its way out. Part of me wants to wait a bit even though I technically have the money now.

i feel out of my depth. It’s making me so stressed and I have a little girl who i feel I am
letting down by not knowing what to do for our house

I put a lot of store in what someone’s reputation is locally so i wouldn’t discount no 1. I have no idea about asbestos disposal though.

I ve never asked anyone about vat registration though so that wouldn’t have crossed my mind either.

We had a leek in my bedroom, the flashing ( piece of lead on roof between properties) had dropped down into the gutter. my bedroom celing was wet. This was a simple repair and did not require a whole new roof.

I would get a surveyor to check the roof and tell you honestly what is needed . It could be worth his cost because you would be able to make more of an informed choice .

I have disposed of asbestos legally. Double bagged it whilst wear PPE and booked it into my local tip. They take up to 10 bags for free by appointment. Please don't assume he's a cowboy. Second time I needed to dispose of more and just booked an asbestos sealed skip. Same double bagging and PPE then they take it away. It's not necessarily illegal to handle asbestos and there's a huge difference in the various types. Both times the work was part of larger works and signed off by building control.
I second the opinion that if the roof isn't leaking then leave it alone unless you are planning to sell soon. Also if it's just some cracked tiles then no need for whole new roof.

What private individuals can legally do, is bag the stuff up themselves and take it themselves to a designated disposal centre. How to do that is easy, not complicated. You wrote in your OP

bag up the few asbestos cement sheets and take them away for us

which is consistent with what I understand he can do and is safe enough to do. If you're concerned he should have a license, you could phone the council to check on the rules for trade about licenses for trade persons. Without a required license he might be tempted to put the bags in ordinary waste stream and I wouldn't like that either. I'm not pretending knowledge I don't have, just saying that

bag up the few asbestos cement sheets and take them away for us

sounds reasonable to me.

OP I would suggest asking neighbours, friends and local Facebook community groups for recommendations.

A tradesman has to have a waste carriers licence and take any trade waste to a transfer station, where it will be weighed and he will pay the fee, he is not allowed to take it to the tip or put it into the general household waste stream. Most councils now require vans to have a permit at the tip/recycling centre and have strict limits on the amount of building waste they will accept. My local one will not take asbestos, plaster or plasterboard, rubble/bricks is limited to one quite small sack.

How long have you had the house for and what did the survey say?

Please be aware that you will need Building Regulations approval if you are replacing more than 25% of your roof.

@Rooooof do you have a facebook group for your local area? I find these so helpful for reviews for this sort of thing as it's real people rather than some unknown online

Quoted 22k. Very thorough, don’t have any slots to do the job until October so obviously busy.
Do be aware of the "go away" quotation. They won't say "go away" but will make the job appear so expensive that you will go away of your own accord. Maybe get a fourth quotation?

When are you thinking of getting the work done? Presumably not during rainy Spring. Try to make a decision soon so you can book the work to be done at a time that suits you. Make sure that the quotation holds good over that time-span.

@clarrylove non of the people who quoted mentioned this?! Do you have to pay to that that approval?

@senua why wouldn’t they want the work? When is best to get a roof done? Urgh I feel
so out of my depth!

why wouldn’t they want the work?
You said: "don’t have any slots to do the job until October". They don't need the job now but might consider slotting it in if you are willing to pay silly money.
When is best to get a roof done?
When it's not raining! Rain slows down the job.
The lowest rainfall (assuming UK) is between March and May. The lowest number of wet days (i.e. the day is likely to be dry) per month is Apr-Jun. The wet season is October and onwards.

Does it actually need doing or could the cracked tiles be replaced and any holes in the underfelt/boarding be repaired /patched up.
Have you been in the loft and inspected if water is or was getting onto the beams/Roof framework as making sure those “A frames” are kept dry and don’t rot will save you thousands in the long run.
Water runs in a downward direction
If water comes in at a certain point, where is it going to? Is it running across a beam or going straight down onto the floor and getting between gaps to sit somewhere in the ceiling of the floor below.
Ultimately building work is very logical and operates on a If it ain’t really really broken don’t fix whilst making sure you keep on top of the little things (like the cracked tiles) to prevent having to fix the big things.