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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To wonder why Reform.leaders Tice and Farage aren't regularly called out about gaslighting a DV victim.

16 replies

Warmlight1 · 04/02/2026 19:08

I am staggered to see Farage taking the high ground with Epstein when they had the gall to undermine the ex girlfriend, victim of DV from their MP colleague. They went on national TV and implied she was lying about being kicked on the ground, when her abuser had been convicted of the offence and served time. He was insisting he only 'pushed her and she fell' and hadn't informed the electorate previous to being elected as an MP. .
So the point is Tice and Farage told everyone on national TV they believed him or that it didn't matter.
We all know offenders exist but we don't expect they will be endorsed by leaders when the truth is known.
Keir Starmer as far as we know has fired a number of men from his cabinet, for abusive words / behaviour. This wouldn't have been easy and has not helped in terms of his politics the upcoming election in Gorton and Denton and action with other related people is not politically expedient for Starmer but was a necessary response to unethical conduct.
Am I being unreasonable to think the two leaderships are not in the same bracket?
Knowingly and publicly undermining a victim / unknowingly promoting a man who is subsequently revealed to be increasingly close to a paedophile.

OP posts:
pointythings · 04/02/2026 19:23

It's simple.

If the victim wasn't attacked by someone brown and foreign but by a nice Reform man, she deserved it.

That is who they are.

KimTheresPeopleThatAreDying · 04/02/2026 19:25

If the perpetrator was white and British then Reform won’t care. That’s it.

WhereIsMyLight · 04/02/2026 19:35

Because fuck all sticks to Farage. He could roll through a muck heap and still come not covered in shit.

He’s made racist comments, sexist comments. He’s accused of antisemitism by people he attended school with. He lied about Brexit. He gaslight everyone that he lied about Brexit. He said never trust a Tory and most of his party (including him) are ex-Tories. His dad was a stockbroker and he went to a private school but he’s still a ‘man of the people’.

Agrumpyknitter · 04/02/2026 19:43

WhereIsMyLight · 04/02/2026 19:35

Because fuck all sticks to Farage. He could roll through a muck heap and still come not covered in shit.

He’s made racist comments, sexist comments. He’s accused of antisemitism by people he attended school with. He lied about Brexit. He gaslight everyone that he lied about Brexit. He said never trust a Tory and most of his party (including him) are ex-Tories. His dad was a stockbroker and he went to a private school but he’s still a ‘man of the people’.

Yes this. Farage has been found of 17 counts of misconduct and failed to declare financial interests of over £300’000 because he doesn’t do computers.

Despite having been a broker and having to ‘do computers’ then.

He had his salary docked by 35k when he was an MEP because he fiddled his expenses.

If Kier Starmer tried to pull the same crap he wouldn’t survive but Reform voters just don’t care.

Reform are worse for women’s rights, there are a number of the party who don’t believe in abortion rights either and he always votes against legislation designed to protect women, like up skirting and spiking (of drinks).

BabooshkaHaHa · 04/02/2026 19:48

It probably attracts less views / clicks than when he’s making outrageously untrue and offensive statements — often from people who disagree with him. If you just look at X — his face, lies and statements receive significant shares from those who despise him. We live in a world that’s only interested in reach as that generates income which in turn disproportionately makes the worst people kings. It’s worked for Trump — he manages to be in the news every single day, often via multiple different threads. He knows that’s all that matters — not the truth or ethics of what is said has very little currency. If people who despise Trump and Farage stopped giving them oxygen, that might help.

Warmlight1 · 04/02/2026 20:04

BabooshkaHaHa · 04/02/2026 19:48

It probably attracts less views / clicks than when he’s making outrageously untrue and offensive statements — often from people who disagree with him. If you just look at X — his face, lies and statements receive significant shares from those who despise him. We live in a world that’s only interested in reach as that generates income which in turn disproportionately makes the worst people kings. It’s worked for Trump — he manages to be in the news every single day, often via multiple different threads. He knows that’s all that matters — not the truth or ethics of what is said has very little currency. If people who despise Trump and Farage stopped giving them oxygen, that might help.

That would be impossible though. If I didn't post this it would make no dent whatsoever in the great scheme of things.
I am genuinely interested in how this can be combatted. I can't accept that what you have described is the best we can do.

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Clavinova · 04/02/2026 20:04

Agrumpyknitter · 04/02/2026 19:43

Yes this. Farage has been found of 17 counts of misconduct and failed to declare financial interests of over £300’000 because he doesn’t do computers.

Despite having been a broker and having to ‘do computers’ then.

He had his salary docked by 35k when he was an MEP because he fiddled his expenses.

If Kier Starmer tried to pull the same crap he wouldn’t survive but Reform voters just don’t care.

Reform are worse for women’s rights, there are a number of the party who don’t believe in abortion rights either and he always votes against legislation designed to protect women, like up skirting and spiking (of drinks).

Farage has been found of 17 counts of misconduct and failed to declare financial interests of over £300’000 because he doesn’t do computers
If Kier Starmer tried to pull the same crap he wouldn’t survive

Starmer breached the same code of conduct eight times;

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-62431183

Sir Keir Starmer

Sir Keir Starmer breached MPs' code of conduct eight times

The Labour leader failed to register eight interests on time, the standards commissioner finds.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-62431183

Warmlight1 · 04/02/2026 20:08

KimTheresPeopleThatAreDying · 04/02/2026 19:25

If the perpetrator was white and British then Reform won’t care. That’s it.

I do agree Reform don't care. That's hardly news though. What I can't get my head around is that they went on national TV and gave some of the most excruciating interviews I've ever seen basically saying with no grounds at all a victim lied- or exaggerated-:when her abuser has been convicted-;
That the public was not repulsed by that as the action of supposed political leaders.

OP posts:
BabooshkaHaHa · 04/02/2026 20:16

Warmlight1 · 04/02/2026 20:04

That would be impossible though. If I didn't post this it would make no dent whatsoever in the great scheme of things.
I am genuinely interested in how this can be combatted. I can't accept that what you have described is the best we can do.

I hear you: this is the bind we’re living through, it’s depressing. I guess things can turn for anyone dominating our info sphere—I live in hope. Some are fighting fire with fire—Gavin Newsom press office gained some traction with that approach but it’s hard to fight the flood of daily dung.

Svunbun · 04/02/2026 20:31

They’re both Teflon and the people voting for them simply don’t give a shit. It’s the same as Trump.

People know what Farage is, and they know what his party is. They just don’t care; it’s far more important to stick one to the two mainstream parties.

It would be interesting to see what Farage and Refom would need to do for some people consider not voting for them.

Warmlight1 · 04/02/2026 20:43

Svunbun · 04/02/2026 20:31

They’re both Teflon and the people voting for them simply don’t give a shit. It’s the same as Trump.

People know what Farage is, and they know what his party is. They just don’t care; it’s far more important to stick one to the two mainstream parties.

It would be interesting to see what Farage and Refom would need to do for some people consider not voting for them.

You know I often wonder about this

OP posts:
Clavinova · 04/02/2026 20:43

Warmlight1
Keir Starmer as far as we know has fired a number of men from his cabinet, for abusive words / behaviour

Labour/Starmer were criticised in opposition for being slow to act in sexual harassment cases though:

Keir Starmer’s spokesperson has insisted that the party leader takes a “zero-tolerance approach to sexual harassment”
[the victim] was told her complaint had been upheld again and that the man, who remains an adviser to a Labour frontbencher, will receive a “final warning”.
Charlotte Nichols, the Labour MP for Warrington North, told the Guardian: “Zero tolerance should mean zero tolerance.
(The adviser was later sacked after media attention)

https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2023/may/10/labour-defends-complaints-process-after-three-year-delay-in-harassment-case

Why didn’t Labour suspend Starmer-ally sex-pest Matheson?

https://skwawkbox.org/2022/10/22/why-didnt-labour-suspend-starmer-ally-sex-pest-matheson/

Known as Woman A, she told the Guardian that the party, under both Keir Starmer and Jeremy Corbyn, had shown no interest in her wellbeing for the past 18 months.

https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2021/may/09/woman-sexually-harassed-by-ex-hartlepool-mp-says-labour-failed-to-support-her

In addition, Starmer suspended another one of his closest allies and shadow cabinet minister in 2022 but the nature of the complaint against the former MP was kept secret until now - the police charged Conor McGinn with sexual assault last week:

https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2022/dec/07/labour-mp-conor-mcginn-has-whip-suspended-over-complaint
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cd7zpg19pwdo

Labour aide ‘allowed to continue work after sexual harassment complaint upheld’

Some MPs uneasy over independent complaints system following case which took three years to investigate

https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2023/may/10/labour-defends-complaints-process-after-three-year-delay-in-harassment-case

Clavinova · 04/02/2026 20:57

Not forgetting former Labour MP Dan Norris - also arrested this week;

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c20d7y2rqw6o

Warmlight1 · 04/02/2026 22:00

The first one seems more of a lack of support. The second - well the guy was rightly suspended
What reform leaders did was more analogous to if Keir now went on TV and alleged that the harassment which was upheld wasn't really an assault, or that she might have misremembered.

OP posts:
Warmlight1 · 04/02/2026 22:04

BabooshkaHaHa · 04/02/2026 20:16

I hear you: this is the bind we’re living through, it’s depressing. I guess things can turn for anyone dominating our info sphere—I live in hope. Some are fighting fire with fire—Gavin Newsom press office gained some traction with that approach but it’s hard to fight the flood of daily dung.

You'd almost need the equivalent of a big corporation on message the whole time.

OP posts:
BabooshkaHaHa · 04/02/2026 23:11

Warmlight1 · 04/02/2026 22:04

You'd almost need the equivalent of a big corporation on message the whole time.

Yep, that’s what Musk, Zuckerberg, Bezos and all the (disproportionately right wing) media moguls know. As a green student I wrote an essay on how information is power; I feel like I’ve rewritten that essay in my head many times since.

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