To think a 15 year old should have a key to his own home,?

[Honeymoan]

DN was round hanging out with DS and realised he had left something at his house ( in the next village). I said I would run him round and he could get it but he said his mum wasn't in and "doesn't let him have a key" .

He's a sensible mature 15 year old, volunteers and is well behaved and helpful. I just assumed most children had a key long before 15? DS has had one since before he started secondary, albeit at first it was partly to practice using one.

Yes, that’s way too old not to have a key! Poor kid.

Of course he should. We also have. Safe box with a key for the kids or anyone who has forgotten one

It is old enough of course but did you ask how many he has lost previously? Speaking from experience.

She's never let him have one, so no chance for him to lose one!

Sensible, mature and responsible? Of course he should.

My 19 year old OTOH doesnt have a key. He lost 2. Then it was lockdown and I was always at home to let him in. Then he had a MH crisis and has only just started venturing out on his own again after a few years of not. So I'll get him one when i remember.

Well yes I can see that is quite different

YANBU, that's ridiculous. I had my own key from 10.

I honestly think she's just too tight to pay to get a key cut. She is wealthy but won't spend money on anything. His only holidays are if he comes with us .

My 21yo doesn’t have a key 😆 because he’s got raging ADHD and has lost more keys than I’ve worn out knickers. We just make sure there’s a door open for him. He’ll have to get his shit together eventually, but at the moment holding down a full time job and managing his MH is enough.

Mine doesn’t have a key and is the same age. I can’t think of one time when they have needed a key as usually I do school runs and when they go out I’m indoors so there has never been an issue.
Will probably get one in the coming months as timetables will change with them leaving school.

Eldest got a key when they started secondary (This meant paying £40 for the magic security key our LL saddled us with when our front door was replaced)

I WFH but most of my team is in the US so the time DC gets home is prime meeting / call time and I can't always open the door.

Mine had keys from age 8 or 9 so they could come in from the park without my having to disturb whatever I was doing to let them in.

My 15 year old doesn't have a key, but he doesn't need one. My 17 year old has a key but I can't remember the last time he used it.

My teen SS doesn't have a key because we can't trust his mother wouldn't use it or copying it etc.
Also he 100% would lose it

My parents never let me have a key because I was never allowed be home alone as a teen. It's bonkers now that I think of it. Our front door automatically locked so I had to ring and be let in every time I went anywhere. So it always felt like a big deal, leaving the house and I always had to explain where I was. Unsurprisingly I left home at 18.

My kids have keys from about 10 or 11. They don't spend very long home alone but it makes sense if one of us has to pop out and they are hanging out with a friend and come home etc.

I had my own key at 10.

What reason is there to not give a 15 year old a key?

Maybe suggest a biometric or keypad door 🔐 ck to his mom.

I strongly suspect ADHD in our case too.

My 18yo has had a key since around 11/12. 15yo has been the same. They have needed their keys over the years.

Hopefully your DN gets a key to teach him some basic independence skills.

I never had one, until I left home at 18. I never felt as if I needed one because mum was always there when I got home, but I did feel a bit funny about it because all my friends had keys to their homes.

Mine doesn't have one cos he doesn't need one. I wfh so the door is always unlocked. On the rare occasion that I won't be home when he is coming home or is the last one to leave, he takes a spare key. But it isn't his. Ditto my 11 year old.

Based on what you have said about him being sensible etc I can't see any reason for him to not have a key. DD had one from around the time they started high school. We work mainly from home, so not that many days one of us won't be here, but it happens occasionally.

My teen does not carry a key, but that is because she has had a key code since she was old enough to reach the electronic keypad.

I wouldn’t want my teen not to have a way into the house at all times. Things happen.

I WFH but I want my children to be able to let themselves into the house and want the freedom to nip out if needed

Of course a 15 year old should have a key. Do all the ones saying their teenagers don't have one never leave the house?

Does she have an expensive lock like a Banham, where replacements cost £30 per key?

It's the only excuse I can think of. I got a key the moment I started secondary school and my mum wasn't in as often.