Uni and Rent

[peacefulpanther]

i am an older single parent who works hard in a job I love, however my income is quite low.

My son is at college and hoping to go to University this year but wants to remain living at home. Which I am more than happy about,

If he were to receive a loan for Tuition Fees as well as a Maintenance Loan am I being unreasonable expecting him to pay me some rent ?
His dad (my ex) has up to now paid maintenance but I know that won’t continue once he finishes college.

Also my son is quite lazy and whilst he has had a part time job for a short time whilst at college, he left after 6 months and doesn’t seem motivated to find anything else.

I am an older single parent who works hard in a job I love, however my income is quite low.
My son is at college and hoping to go to University this year but wants to remain living at home. Which I am more than happy about,
If he were to receive a loan for Tuition Fees as well as a Maintenance Loan am I being unreasonable expecting him to pay me some rent ?
His dad (my ex) has up to now paid maintenance but I know that won’t continue once he finishes college.
Also my son is quite lazy and whilst he has had a part time job for a short time whilst at college, he left after 6 months and doesn’t seem motivated

How much maintenance loan will he get?
What are you expecting him to pay for himself? - travel, social, clothes/toiletries, phone etc?
What are you asking rent to cover - food, whatever 'extra' he adds to household bills etc?

Most students either work p/t and/or during holidays although such jobs that fit around studies are getting harder and harder to find.

Assuming he gets maximum loan then it’s quite substantial and yes asking for contributions towards food and other key costs as a minimum would be fair

but it is a loan - he doesn’t have to take the maximum they give and long term it might be best not to max out

I would also be expecting he to request support directly from his father towards his studies

I know Maintenance grants are due to increase but from what I can understand, a conservative guess is he would get approximately £8000 per year.

He has an older car which was gifted to him and an account with appx £2500 in which pays for any repairs and insurance (from my parents) but I was assuming he would pay something towards food and general household bills and use the savings to pay for his fuel etc.
I was not expecting him to pay a lot but thought it was important he made a contribution but after his reaction when discussing it I’m now not so sure …

I think the SFE maintenance loan calculation is less for those living at home,

It depends really how much debt you want him to be in when he leaves uni and if you can afford it if he doesn’t pay you.

Minimum living at home maintenance loan is just under £4k. It’s a sliding scale depending on your income but he can request just the minimum. But do you need the money? Does he? I’m not sure why he needs to take a loan at all if you don’t need it. But you say your income is low so perhaps you need him to cover his expenses, even if you don’t charge him rent (phone, socialising, hair cuts, gym, whatever) My DD is at uni and with all the extra outside of her course activities she’s involved in she has no time for a job term time, but she worked last summer and this summer has an internship abroad (she’s paid but has to cover her travel and living expenses so probably break even). But she’s also getting almost max loan and other than paying for her phone and dentist I don’t give her anything. Her rent is just under £10k a year. But if she lived at home I wouldn’t charge her rent and she wouldn’t need the loan as her job gave her enough to live on for the year as she’s quite frugal.
So figure out what you pay for him now and if you need him to pay for whatever (your child benefit will stop when he turns 18 too) once he goes to uni. Remember there are costs - freshers week, societies, transport. He should definitely get a job this coming summer which will give him a nice cushion to start with. I wouldn’t borrow money unless it’s needed, irrespective of people saying it’s a ‘tax’ - it’s still a loan with interest that needs to be repaid.

The table of how much he will get is here on this page, scroll down.

www.savethestudent.org/student-finance/maintenance-loans.html

Living at home if the household income is £25k or less he gets £8877.
£30k household income, he would get £8132.

You lose child benefit for a start so you need to cover that, plus food, plus utilities. If he lived away from home he wouldn't get that much more in maintenance loan and would be paying an absolute fortune in rented halls for at least first year. Ds's were £8k for first year halls.

It is his decision to go to uni and therefore his debt. Ds is 22 and on a mid £40k salary after going to uni. He doesn't see debt, he sees a career ladder and a net salary. There are student loan calculators online to show how much you earn, how long it takes to pay it back. Get informed. Start with just tuition fee debt then add in maintenance loans if it worries you.

Ds2 pays £42 a week for his food at uni, plus laundry costs. Your son needs to pay for his food, just because he lives at home doesn't mean you have to support him financially if you are unable to.

If he wanted to go to uni away from home, you'd likely end up paying out more as the full loan only covers rent pretty much.
As a stay at home student he'd get less loan but presumably your costs for him would stay the same as they are now. If he's not working, I would not ask him to pay anything but nor would I be giving him any money either. Can his dad contribute too?

Not sure this will be helpful but next year DS will be living at home for his final year. Up till now he’s taken the full loan and we’ve paid halls/most of his rent (to a point / in second year we said he had to cover some as it was so expensive). He’s also had a job and is studying hard.

when he’s at home I assume he will get the (reduced) loan. Our savings will be that we don’t have to shell out c£8k for rent. I won’t be charging him anything. But I’ll expect him to get a job and won’t be giving him any additional money.

I'm a single parent on an ill health pension (and uc top up) so low income/unable to work/make any extra. When dc1 left school we had a discussion that when they were 18 I would continue to put a roof over their head however I would need some financial contribution for food/bills.
The decision we came to as a family was it was fair to contribute £200 a month. They pay for phone, clothes, extra toiletries (I continue to buy the basics), socialising, transport etc. I did support in practical ways (laundry, cooking, buying university equipment as I could).
This also means they can save hard (dc1 was able to buy a shared ownership house because of living at home).
I'm going to do the same with dc2 and 3 and they seem happy with this.
I think the best thing I did was have an honest conversation with dc about the situation so they understood this wasn't a choice but a necessity.
Another option you could do is take some rent off him, pop it in a savings account and then its there if you need it, if you don't you can give him it towards a deposit for a house/rent when he leaves home.

The living at home loan is less as it assumed that there is no rent. A student living in a shared house away from home will pay rent, a share of bills, and food, laundry and travel during term time. For students on the minimum loan parents often pay the rent and the loan covers the rest.

It would be reasonable to ask for a share of bills (not necessarily half) as your costs will be higher especially food. He should have enough left for hobbies, travel etc. Students don't pay council tax so you can't really expect him to contribute to that. This is assuming he is eligible for close to the maximum loan. Remember repayments are based on income after graduation and not amount borrowed.

He can definitely contribute a proper amount towards food bills and can buy all his own toiletries, fuel, car pass ( he may not be able to park a car at uni at all. Most campuses don't allow students or staff to use cars. My eldest son and my youngest brother bother work at different unis and everyone is expected to use public transport, bike or feet)

If she is truly low paid then she would t be paying more - the kids get a job to make ends meet.

snd she might end up with single person discount on council tax and a much lower food end energy bill… so if he went away she would be much better off - he should be paying that difference at least

If he does stay home remember he can get student exemption so you stay on the 25% single person for council tax.

It is not unreasonable for him to pay rent/keep. His alternative is to move out and end up using all his student loan on rent alone!

My DC is doing open uni so lives at home. The government derermine it is part time although they study full time. But they still get a decent enough grant and tiny loan.
Their dad gives them £10 a month now he doesn't have to pay maintenance of several hundred 🤣. They also get PIP (hence studying from home)
I charge them enough to cover 'normal' food and some of the bills. They buy any extra food.

Thank you to everyone who has taken the time to respond.
All opinions are welcome and help me make a balanced decision as I try to work out a way forward .

I am in a shared ownership house, we have a comfortable home, I enjoy the simple things in life but I am on a low income and money will be much tighter when he leaves college. (His dad has already stated CM will stop)

Nevertheless, I worked from 16 before going to Uni later in life and got little help, yet feel this made me more resilient and responsible particularly when I became a SP.

So whilst money is going to be tight, I will be able to pay my bills but not much left over each month , I also feel it is important that now (he will be 19 when he starts Uni) he takes some (I’m not expecting a lot of rent) responsibility financially.

I think his response “what you expect me to pay to live in my own home, that’s ridiculous ” 😂 has made me question what is fair