Why would a GP lie about this?

[whylieabout]

When I was 18 I had counselling through my GP surgery . Had my allocated sessions and was discharged. A few months later I needed more counselling so asked our family gp to please re refer

He said he couldn’t as the counsellor I saw had sadly passed away and that there was no other option.

Recently my paper notes had been added to my online records and I saw the letters from the counsellor telling the GP she was deeply concerned about me and detailing what she saw as abuse from my mother. My mother always maintained that she was ‘great friends’ with the GP and they got on well and she went a lot. In some letters I saw he had described me in the referral as ‘somewhat of a troublemaker causing her mother stress and distress with behaviours such as having a boyfriend’ !!! Surely that’s normal for a teen to have a boyfriend!

Anyway I thought after seeing the counsellors name what had happened to her as she wasn’t that old and I wondered what she had passed away from . I googled her name and she’s STILL ALIVE ???? Still
a counsellor and local.

The GP is now retired. I cannot understand why he would lie to me?
It’s so long ago but AIBU to be really angry and really confused why on earth he lied ?

That is shocking!
It sounds like he was trying to cover up for your mother. You've said they were friends, I think you already suspect the reason why he lied.

The question is, do you want to take it further?
I think I'd be tempted to take this to the BMA and maybe even the police. You were treated appallingly.

It was so long ago but I’m waiting to see when my online records are completed as I know roughly when I asked for a re referral I want to seethe consultation notes from that visit

Would it be wrong for me to contact the counsellor? She may not remember me but I have the letters she wrote during my session and the discharge letter it may remind her or is that the wrong thing to do ?

Oh I'd very much contact the counsellor. Shine light and watch them scurry

It will be my word against his is all I’m thinking so is there any point. I’m just really shocked by it as it left me without support at a really vulnerable time but I just accepted she had died and that meant I couldn’t get counselling then I struggled.

How would it help to contact the counsellor? She presumably knew nothing about your request to see her again. Do you have anything in writing from your GP saying this counsellor had died, or a witness to him saying it? If so it would be easy to lodge a complaint. Still possible without that though, if you want to take it further.

If I was you I would definitely contact her, she might be able to help you make sense of everything that happened

Do you think your mother was abusing you @whylieabout ?

I don’t really know what to do. My online records aren’t fully completed yet they have added things in batches every so often recently as they are in the process of moving it all fully onto online records up till now I only had an online medical history post 21 .

You could contact the counsellor for actual counselling, since she was on your side before, especially if you think that you could benefit from her assistance. You can tell her what your GP said, and that he must've been mistaken...

Sadly yes I had a very difficult home life. I feel like the counselling was the first time I’d opened up about things that had a happened at home and it feels like the GP didn’t want negative attention drawn to my mother

That's really disturbing. I would definitely contact the counsellor she will likely be very happy to see you.

There is no way this would be able to happen now.

How long ago was it OP. It is bloody awful but depending on how long ago it was I am not sure what you can actually do.

21 years a very long time ago . I feel totally stupid that I just accepted what he said I just didn’t think a GP would lie.

It sounds like the GP lied to protect your mother. It’s unlikely the counsellor knew. You could complain from the perspective the GP should have done a safeguarding referall and failed to do so

Contact the counsellor from the perspective of actual counselling (if you can afford it), and once your online records are complete you can decide what to do about the GO. I’d advise opening a complaint, but you’ll want to know if there is clear evidence first.

This is awful. Is your mother still alive? I'm not sure if it makes a difference, but it might affect how you want to approach it, and what you want to get out of it.

The behaviour of the GP at the time was appalling. I think I would want to take it further, and I would want to contact the counsellor.

I'm so sorry, yes, @firstofallimadelight has it, I think; the GP was protecting your mother by brushing abuse allegations under the carpet and preventing you from seeing the counsellor again. I would contact PALS, even though it was a long time ago, you were very let down.

Any chance the GP was romantically linked to your mother,?