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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To let 17yo DS quit college for a f/t job?

170 replies

PoliteSquid · 19/01/2026 15:16

My DS hated school, hates college and has no intention of carrying on with any kind of study. Although he’s only 17 and could decide differently in a few years.

He has been searching for an apprenticeship, head firmly in the sand about the 1 day a week of college/uni work!

This morning he has been offered a full time trainee role in an engineering company. It’s not an apprenticeship, it’s in house training. Well established company 2 big sites fairly local. It’s full NMW even tho he’s so young.

DH thinks he should stay at college as there’s only 4 months to go. DS wants to leave college immediately. I can see both sides but erring towards DS’s view. AIBU to let him take the job?

OP posts:
PeonyBulb · 19/01/2026 18:13

This is a fantastic offer for him he should definitely take it

TheTwenties · 19/01/2026 18:14

Jobs are so hard to come by. What qualifications is he likely to come out of college with? I would weigh up the likelihood of another opportunity like the one he’s been offered coming along. Is there any chance he could go in for a week on work experience to get a better idea of it’s really the right environment for him? It would be awful to walk away from college thinking the grass is greener, hating it and having neither a qualification or job in 6 months time.

Whattodo1122 · 19/01/2026 18:15

I work in employability and would 100 percent say take the job!! He is so lucky to be offered a job he’s excited about.
So many leaving uni and can’t find work so taking anything…the work force is massively changing and sounds like he’s secured something to protect his future.

SherbetDipDap · 19/01/2026 18:20

Take the job. He could be a home owner before he’s 21.

If college isn’t for him there is no use flogging a dead horse. He will probably excel in the workplace.

redfishcat · 19/01/2026 18:20

Job. And charge him digs for food and bills

JoBrodie · 19/01/2026 18:21

Team Job.

"He has been searching for an apprenticeship, head firmly in the sand about the 1 day a week of college/uni work!"

It sounds like he's been proactive about finding something, rather than disengaging completely. And he's been successful, which is fantastic :)

Jo

YouNiftyCrab · 19/01/2026 18:23

We have a similar thing with my son he’s 16 about to sit his exams but hates everything about school. Some people are academic, others are hands on learners. Let him make that decision to take the job, it could turn into something very sucessful and if not he’s still young enough to start again and retrain 🙂

Frugalgal · 19/01/2026 18:25

PoliteSquid · 19/01/2026 15:16

My DS hated school, hates college and has no intention of carrying on with any kind of study. Although he’s only 17 and could decide differently in a few years.

He has been searching for an apprenticeship, head firmly in the sand about the 1 day a week of college/uni work!

This morning he has been offered a full time trainee role in an engineering company. It’s not an apprenticeship, it’s in house training. Well established company 2 big sites fairly local. It’s full NMW even tho he’s so young.

DH thinks he should stay at college as there’s only 4 months to go. DS wants to leave college immediately. I can see both sides but erring towards DS’s view. AIBU to let him take the job?

Let him take the job, 100%

anma302 · 19/01/2026 18:26

He needs to do what he wants as he seems to have lost interest in college and opportunities to get a job don't come every day.
Like you said he might change his mind down the line and go back to college.i know people who did in their 40s and 50s.
Sometimes the course that is chosen is not right and he has been given a different choice to take.
All the best to him whatever he decides.

ThesoundofSunday · 19/01/2026 18:27

Definitely take the job.

DD17 is in a similar position, she hates college and would love a trainee job. She has applied and applied for jobs but they are few and far between in our area and each has hundreds of applicants.

Good luck to your ds, hopefully he will love it.

cramptramp · 19/01/2026 18:28

He’s 17. It’s not up to you. If he wants to take the apprenticeship he will.

MrsWembley · 19/01/2026 18:32

Take the job!
I work in a FE college and can see some kids thrive and some kids drown. If he’s being offered on the job training and he’s keen now, don’t waste this opportunity!

He will regret it later when he’s dropped out completely and has nothing to get up for if he doesn’t.

MinkJagger · 19/01/2026 18:35

Job, 100%

starryeyess · 19/01/2026 18:36

I think he should take the job - but when does it start? I would keep going with college as long as possible and ask if he can take days off for the exams - if that's possible.

He's done nearly all the work, it's a shame not to get the qualifications even if it's not the best grades.

Purlant · 19/01/2026 18:38

What a great opportunity! My friend this did, he was paid well throughout and they paid for her MEng (degree plus masters). They now run their own company, have a house all by themselves age of 30.

TeaBiscuitsNaptime · 19/01/2026 18:47

Take the job!

ExpressCheckout · 19/01/2026 18:50

Another vote for "take the job". It's a brilliant opportunity!

As a teacher, you know he can re-train or return to study later in life, if he wanted to. Plus, come spring/summer, there will be more competition for jobs.

MoreIcedLattePlease · 19/01/2026 18:54

Job - 100%! We let DS1 leave college this time last year without anything to go to. He was miserable! By the time it got to Easter he had a job, which he remains at part time, and he started at a new college in September. It's been the making of him, and getting to work was absolutely the reason he made it through the year.

He's nearly an adult, it's up to him to choose anyway. Education will always be there again in future if he wants to go back to it.

Comethefuckonbridget1 · 19/01/2026 18:59

Take the job. I did well at school up til GCSE but dropped out of sixth form and then college to get a full time job. I just really didn’t get on with being in the education setting past school.

i found opportunity to study for a number of different qualifications through work and have managed to build a successful career. One of my qualifications is equivalent to a degree. Further education isn’t for everyone, he’s young enough to go back to it if the job doesn’t work out too.

Om83 · 19/01/2026 19:20

Might be worth talking to the college and finding out how much work he actually has left in that 4 months- if he has been assessed as he’s gone it might not be a massive amount??
The college will lose money and success statistics if he drops out now and doesn’t complete his course, so they might be willing to be flexible to let him finish the coursework in his own time without actually attending, or attend a couple of key sessions/assessments to complete that he could take as holiday from his new job (or study leave if they are an understanding company).

Worth asking as he is so close to finishing and just incase the new job doesn’t turn out as he’d hoped to fall back on.

3awesomestars · 19/01/2026 19:49

At 17 it’s his decision.

Lovestotravel79 · 19/01/2026 19:53

I don't understand the phrase letting him, surely its his decision. Academia is not for everyone, why do you class a full time learning role as less important than a college course? He needs to do what will make him happy and he is certainly young enough that if it isn’t right for him there will be plenty other avenues to explore.

Terfarina · 19/01/2026 20:01

Support your son in taking up this opportunity! Actual on the job training is way better than a qualification, it sounds like this is the sort of job he'd aspire to after L3 so brilliant if he has it now and is motivated, so will therefore do well

TeenToTwenties · 19/01/2026 20:06

Serious suggestion, talk to college and get a compromise?

He is doing an Extended Diploma, and we are already in January and I think you implied second year. So how many units has he completed already and has he done all the compulsory ones?
So if he stopped now can he still come away with a 2 A level equivalent or a 1.5 one?
If he can but needs to do an exam, will they let him leave but come back for the exam?

CanIShareThis · 19/01/2026 20:20

He would be mad not to take the job!