I'm a single mum to DD (2). I live next door to my parents but my mum currently lives with me as things are not good between her and my dad, though they rub along.
I work full time, DD is in nursery, my dad helps with pick up and drop off, ex-DH helps AND I have a nanny to pick up the slack (yes, I'm very privileged but I work hard and earn enough money to cut myself some slack so I can work).
I want to get away for a few days next with my partner. I first put it to mum as an FYI and she insisted I don't go. She had cancer last year but has been given the clear and is on the mend massively. The entire time she had cancer she stayed with me and I helped care for her on top of everything (hence nanny was a god send).
She has a follow up scan and said she can't possibly say whether I can go until she gets those results. Now she's had the results, the doctor gave her the all clear but she's worried about some spots she saw and says she wants another scan, which is now scheduled for mid-Feb.
Bearing in mind, I have completely arrange DD's care while I am away, I planned to be away for 3 nights, nanny is doing extra shifts, ex-DH is doing nursery pick up and putting her to bed and my dad will stay at my house overnight in case DD needs anything, though she generally sleeps through these days
I have done absolutely everything to ensure as little disruption to DD as possible, already feeling guilty about going away without her for the first time she was born. And my mum has been piling on the guilt about it as if somehow it makes things worse for her.
AIBU to go anyway? I'm just at the end of my tether with the guilt and constantly caring for everyone in this house and then being made to feel like a selfish cow and shit daughter and mother for going away for 3 and a half days. I really feel like my mother has done a number on me.