To ask the etiquette around kids birthday gifts?

[Colourconundrum]

My little one turned 1 last year and we hosted a birthday party for him, our family & friends with entertainment & food etc.

We didn’t expect it but all our friends bought him gifts which was very kind of them - however my question is, should we be reciprocating gifts for their children even if they aren’t hosting parties?

I’m a SAHM so ideally I don’t want to be buying lots of presents but equally don’t want to look rude.

No, apart from nieces/nephews/godchildren, we only buy presents for children when we are invited to celebrate with them!

We only do gifts for kids parties or close friends kids. Even then, we do a bit of regifting, second hand treasures (books mostly), or Vinted BNWT.

We only gift for children in our family and very special best friends, as your child is 1 I doubt they have any best friends just yet!

No unless family gifts only if there's a party you are invited too...

For first birthdays it’s more about the novelty and the present is more a gesture of friendship and thought to the parents than for the child themselves, friends are more likely to give presents then. Beyond that, unnecessary.

I don’t give to friends’ children unless I’m invited to their birthday party. At 39 I don’t get many invitations to children’s birthday parties.

We have a close group of friends (6 kids in total) and I buy for them children even if they don’t have a party.

We recently had DD’s 4th birthday party and she had 35 other children there who all gave gifts, but I would only buy for them children if my DD was invited to their party.

I would.

You take a gift to a party.

No one with an ounce of common sense expects you to remember their child's birthday (unless it's very close family/friends) if there's no party that you're invited to celebrate it at.

I think you’ll also probably find most of your friends would be relieved not to have to get onto the endless carousel of receiving presents for their DC and then feeling like they have to buy for yours in return. If you have a fair number of friends who are parents, it gets expensive, you often don’t know what the DC has already, and who really needs or has space for twenty more toys or outfits from friends.

No is the short answer.

I buy for nieces and nephews and if dd was invited to a party she’d take a gift.

Absolutely do not start buying presents for friends kids unless you get invited to a party. The present is a thank you for the party. Otherwise you'll be buying for years!

Nephews and nieces and god children I'd buy regardless and new babies. Very close friends I might buy for their child's first birthday.

You take a gift to a party. I don't know how you didn't expect presents tbh 🤣