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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think it’s strange I need a vaccine to meet newborn abroad

59 replies

FlowerPowerM · 16/01/2026 11:26

Going to visit a relative in the US who has a newborn. We’ve all had a to have a vaccine before meeting them - and apparently that’s the standard there. I’ve never heard of this before and wondered are they just being over cautious? We don’t seem to have anything like that here. Are babies in the UK being less protected than in the US?
Just to clarify I’ve had the vaccine and it was tetanus, dyptheria, whooping cough and then we had to have the flu vaccine which we had had anyway.

dairydebris · 16/01/2026 12:23

* internal eye roll, and respect parents wishes *

saraclara · 16/01/2026 12:27

Anti-Vax is much bigger a thing in the US, so parents of babies can't rely on the herd immunity that we are fortunate to have here.
And of course these particular parents might have very anti-Vax family members or friends, so they could be using this blanket request to keep them away from their newborn.

FlowerPowerM · 16/01/2026 12:33

Just to clarify because it seems that a couple of people haven’t read my full post. We got the vaccinations without questioning it. I’m just interested in hearing the background to the request and why it’s not really a thing in the UK.
I am very familiar with both their families, none are anti vaxers.

OP posts:
ChaosDreamV2 · 16/01/2026 12:45

If mum has had whooping cough vaccine baby should be protected by maternal antibodies.

FlowerPowerM · 16/01/2026 12:47

ChaosDreamV2 · 16/01/2026 12:45

If mum has had whooping cough vaccine baby should be protected by maternal antibodies.

Yes she had it during pregnancy.

OP posts:
Coffeeishot · 16/01/2026 12:51

FlowerPowerM · 16/01/2026 11:26

Going to visit a relative in the US who has a newborn. We’ve all had a to have a vaccine before meeting them - and apparently that’s the standard there. I’ve never heard of this before and wondered are they just being over cautious? We don’t seem to have anything like that here. Are babies in the UK being less protected than in the US?
Just to clarify I’ve had the vaccine and it was tetanus, dyptheria, whooping cough and then we had to have the flu vaccine which we had had anyway.

Vaccines are expensive in the US not everybodies insurance will cover it so adults can be unvacinated, we are privilaged we have free vaccines so obviously you were covered , the new parents were trying to protect their newborn.

Beenwhereyouareagain · 16/01/2026 14:02

We had to have this vaccine before each of our grandchildren were born. I had no problem with that. Whooping cough can be a killer, especially for an infant.

NeverDropYourMooncup · 16/01/2026 16:11

FlowerPowerM · 16/01/2026 12:33

Just to clarify because it seems that a couple of people haven’t read my full post. We got the vaccinations without questioning it. I’m just interested in hearing the background to the request and why it’s not really a thing in the UK.
I am very familiar with both their families, none are anti vaxers.

Fewer antivaxxers here to need to ask in the first place, greater herd immunity so less likely to come into contact with people carrying infection, fewer fans of raw milk, etc, etc.

They are more likely to come across people who are very much against all vaccination there, so they're aware of the risks in a way we aren't - and if they do, they could be bankrupted in the process.

DemonsandMosquitoes · 16/01/2026 17:41

W0tnow · 16/01/2026 11:27

I think it’s sensible to have whooping cough vaccine when meeting a newborn these days. I would probably request it for close family if I was having a baby. It’s a triple vaccine, right? Hence the inclusion of tetanus and diphtheria?

Edited

You wouldn’t get it on the NHS for this reason. Would have to pay privately as it’s not part of the routine immunisation schedule in the UK for close family.
Fwiw it’s called ‘cocooning’.

igelkott2026 · 16/01/2026 17:45

Orangemintcream · 16/01/2026 11:35

Surely you were already up to date with those anyway ? Possibly not the flu vaccine but the others ?

As far as I know you don't get a tetanus jab anymore (other than as a child) and the diphtheria and whooping cough vaccines that you get as a child will have potentially worn off. Presumably that's why they are vaccinating pregnant women against whopping cough to make sure they are (still) protected..

Ponderingwindow · 16/01/2026 17:52

Yes, it is common in my social circle to make sure family are up to date on their vaccines before meeting the baby. Everyone is supposed to get the tentanus/diptheria/whooping cough booster at regular intervals any regular intervals anyway. I got my booster last week along with a shingles vax. Then flu and now Covid shots every fall.

FlowerPowerM · 16/01/2026 18:36

Coffeeishot · 16/01/2026 12:51

Vaccines are expensive in the US not everybodies insurance will cover it so adults can be unvacinated, we are privilaged we have free vaccines so obviously you were covered , the new parents were trying to protect their newborn.

Edited

Thanks, I can see it makes sense for people living in the US if they do have an anti vaxer issue or many people not being able to afford vaccines. I think what threw me a bit was that they’ve only asked people who are travelling from the UK to get them done but not people who live in the US who are just popping in for a cup of tea and to meet baby.
So I was a bit confused by that considering they know all of us are up to date with our vaccines, but seems like it could be because the UK doesn’t offer boosters regularly.

OP posts:
BertieBotts · 16/01/2026 23:18

igelkott2026 · 16/01/2026 17:45

As far as I know you don't get a tetanus jab anymore (other than as a child) and the diphtheria and whooping cough vaccines that you get as a child will have potentially worn off. Presumably that's why they are vaccinating pregnant women against whopping cough to make sure they are (still) protected..

Tetanus, Diphtheria and Pertussis (Whooping Cough) are all given together as DTAP/TDAP. It was explained to me with my last baby that the jab you get in pregnancy is useful regardless of when you've had your last tetanus jab. I'd had one 5 years previously due to an injury, so the protection was still up to date. But the jab you get in the last trimester has to be given then in order to confer protection to the newborn.

BertieBotts · 16/01/2026 23:20

FlowerPowerM · 16/01/2026 18:36

Thanks, I can see it makes sense for people living in the US if they do have an anti vaxer issue or many people not being able to afford vaccines. I think what threw me a bit was that they’ve only asked people who are travelling from the UK to get them done but not people who live in the US who are just popping in for a cup of tea and to meet baby.
So I was a bit confused by that considering they know all of us are up to date with our vaccines, but seems like it could be because the UK doesn’t offer boosters regularly.

That would make sense, you are "up to date" in terms of UK guidance, but not in terms of US guidance if your TDAP was over 10 years old.

W0tnow · 16/01/2026 23:41

DemonsandMosquitoes · 16/01/2026 17:41

You wouldn’t get it on the NHS for this reason. Would have to pay privately as it’s not part of the routine immunisation schedule in the UK for close family.
Fwiw it’s called ‘cocooning’.

Oh right. I vaguely remember just after I had my kids there were some recommendations going around due to a spike in WC. This was in Australia. My youngest is 19 so it was a while ago.

TeaRoseTallulah · 16/01/2026 23:44

So which vaccine was it?

Pistachiocake · 16/01/2026 23:48

Orangemintcream · 16/01/2026 11:35

Surely you were already up to date with those anyway ? Possibly not the flu vaccine but the others ?

I don't think I have been offered any vaccines in my adult life (flu and Covid aside, and even them not for 3 years)? So I presumably am not up to date, but by NHS guidelines I wouldn't get any?
Or are other areas in the UK just offering ones my isn't?

feministmom4ever · 16/01/2026 23:52

It’s pretty common in the US for pediatricians to recommend, to the parents of children under three months, that any visiting family be up to date on vaccines and to get a flu vaccination during flu season. Typically these are covered by insurance, and flu vaccines are free at a lot of pharmacies.

Eenameenadeeka · 16/01/2026 23:59

Whooping cough can kill a newborn baby, so the "best practice" is that everyone around a new baby be vaccinated to protect them as much as possible. It is advised by many doctors where there are outbreaks, to get a booster for anyone in contact with baby and more cautious parents follow this advice.

FlowerPowerM · 17/01/2026 00:36

@TeaRoseTallulah its called Tdap. We had to travel a bit to find a provider,
It all makes sense but now I’m surprised it’s not mentioned in the UK at all with new babies, I’ve never heard of it before aside from giving the whooping cough vaccine to pregnant Mothers.

OP posts:
steff13 · 17/01/2026 01:05

Coffeeishot · 16/01/2026 12:51

Vaccines are expensive in the US not everybodies insurance will cover it so adults can be unvacinated, we are privilaged we have free vaccines so obviously you were covered , the new parents were trying to protect their newborn.

Edited

Required vaccines can be obtained for free at the local health department, with or without insurance.

canklesmctacotits · 17/01/2026 02:33

You’ve got to the bottom of the DTAP shot, but I’m surprised by the flu shot request. You having received that (and I’m not sure the one you got in the UK would be applicable to the super flu strain going round here) wouldn’t help the baby or its parents anyway, would it? We’ve all had our flu shots but got unbelievably sick with Flu A over the holidays anyway. I wouldn’t have dreamt of going anywhere near a baby, let alone a newborn one, when I was that ill.

Anyway, they’re only good things. Safe travels and congrats on the new addition!

ForCoralScroller · 17/01/2026 02:39

I'd never ever get a vaccine while pregnant, and I'd advised daughters not to either

SouthernNights59 · 17/01/2026 03:21

igelkott2026 · 16/01/2026 17:45

As far as I know you don't get a tetanus jab anymore (other than as a child) and the diphtheria and whooping cough vaccines that you get as a child will have potentially worn off. Presumably that's why they are vaccinating pregnant women against whopping cough to make sure they are (still) protected..

I'm not in the UK but I was called in for a routine tetanus jab at 65 - and the other two were part of the same vaccine.

Mt563 · 17/01/2026 03:23

There's the additional worry in the US of affording treatment and taking time off work (often at will employment).