Good morning,
been together with bf 4 years. Im almost certain he is a narcissist. He can’t show any form of empathy, reassurance or will never take blame for anything he does wrong.
if he does something and I get a little bit upset he will say get the violins out or poor you. If I ever mention to him that all I want at these times is just some love in any kind of way he will lose it. Like lastnight. Told me to get out of his flat.
so yesterday and I do apologise for being rude. He phoned me and mentioned he was Randy and would love it if I sucked his d…. Now this is pathetic and sad at the same time. I know if I agree to this then he will be nice too me. He is nice but I lack a huge amount of an emotional connection with him because I honestly think he’s incapable of being loving towards me if it doesn’t involve sex. So saying I would do that I hope he will give me what I need from him .
hours went by. I got home from work, showered, sorted my house out and went up to his flat. It took him a good hour then to come to bed because obviously things he needed to do and he showered. As soon as he gets in bed he turns around and starts kissing me. Puts my hand on his d… and it’s hard. Keeps kissing and he said are you going to do what you said? Now and I know it’s my fault for saying i would then not being in the mood too said i don’t want too now and also I feel like I got a cold sore coming .
he said well we ain’t having sex unless you do what you said. And he kept on and on . I said no a good few times then he turns over. He does this all the time. And it could be over anything. He has always got to get his own way and will sulk if he doesn’t.
im laying there feeling sad, bad for not doing it and anxious. After a good ten minutes he looks at me and says sulking because I won’t give you d…. I said no you just upset me . He gets up and goes to get on top of me for sex i said 3 times I wasn’t in the mood. During sex I wasn’t in to it and I could tell he wasn’t either . So it was all pointless.
he didnt speak to me after it just lay there watching tv. And I still feel sad from just before . I get up and put my clothes on and then he says whats the matter . I hate telling him because it always ends in an argument. But I did . And maybe I worded it all wrong , maybe I am in the wrong. But I said I hate it when he keeps on and said he uses sex as a weapon.
i then mentioned that he will by me stuff and hide them and unless I suck his d… he won’t give them too me. This hasn’t happened for months now mind.
he was extremely annoyed. Said here I go with the sob story’s. And said it was my fault I shouldn’t wind him up and say I was going to do it if I wasn’t going too.
he then told me to get out. Which I did and I have not heard off him at all. I want to know have I really made all this up in my head ? Has he got any right too be annoyed at me? I know it’s my fault for saying I would . There’s been numerous incidents where things like this has happened and I think it maybe triggered something in my head . I wasn’t angry but just felt and still do feel sad. Thankyou