To wonder if anyone else is treated like dirt daily??

[CrumbleGrumbles]

I am on the bottom rung of the ladder at work and apparently this means I can just be treated like I’m invisible. For example, being excluded from conversations, colleagues bringing in cakes but not one for me, management treating other colleagues to little things, here and there, but never me.

I am totally sick of it. I have 4 months left in my current job, as I have something else lined up, but I have been there for two years and I go between feeling angry, or feeling worthless, thanks to how these people treat me. They are the type of people who think the world revolves around them.

Sorry, I just need to get this off my chest. Today has been a hard day.

That’s awful OP. Shouldn’t matter if you are the cleaner or CEO everyone should be treated with respect. I visited a company recently and we had lunch in the cafeteria we had a lot of work to do and the director told all his staff to leave their plates and trays and he would sort it. I had so much respect for him.

I temped for years, so I know the feeling of being invisible, beneath notice and bottom of the totem pole. It’s horrible and lonely, but my approach was to make sure I had stuff going on outside work that made me feel myself, with people who valued me. I basically switched my personality off during working hours and felt like I was playing a part rather than being myself, so the poor treatment was aimed at the role rather than at me, iyswim. I’m glad you’re getting out of there soon, and I hope your new job is better.

Urgh sounds absolutely horrible. Thank goodness you are leaving. You should make sure to bring in a cake for your last day, a really really nice huge expensive cake, and eat it at your desk without offering anyone else any. At the end of the day you should wrap up the rest of it and say loudly'I am really looking forward to polishing off the rest of this tonight with a glass of champagne, it is really delicious'.

These kind of pigs are not worth bothering with. They lack basic manners. It says everything about them and nothing about you.

Thanks all. I tried so hard to fit in, initially thinking it was maybe just the fact that I was new, but this can’t be the case now, after 2 years. I have brought in cakes for everyone and I know that I have always made friends where ever I have worked. I’m someone who genuinely just gets along with everyone, but when I’m with these people, I feel like the wouldn’t even think I was worthy of them wiping their shoes on me.

Theres a handful of them, but I’m struggling to understand how they can all behave in such a disgusting manner. Maybe it’s a pack mentality.

They are all richer than me, by quite a margin. I genuinely believe that I would have to be wealthy or in a senior role to be treated with any amount of respect.

Best to move to another department or another workplace. Different places have different vibes. I moved department. Entirely different one end of an open plan office to the other.

What do you do? How old are you?

When I look back to when I was a junior and young and inexperienced I let slide a lot of awful behaviour towards me as I didn’t know any better and was naive and struggled to advocate for myself.

Is it that kind of situation?

If not - you’re leaving anyway, raise a grievance, get it in record and also mention it as a reason for leaving if you have an exit interview. Make it hard for them. And make sure they know it. It might be scary but it will be satisfying and it will boost your confidence.

People like this generally do it to people they feel they can, either they will get away with it or they are sure they won’t be challenged. They wouldn’t do it to someone who would fight back. Just cowards and bullies

Hope you’re ok

Workplaces are notorious for it - I thought my latest one didn’t have this sort of thing, two years later I started to notice things.

more than anything it’s disappointing - we are all grown ups surely it makes the day harder not easier. I’ll never understand mean people. But be proud you aren’t one! I’d rather be left out than leave anyone out

I’m not young (35) and I’m in an admin role. I am nice to people and always see the best in others, but I’ve never had to deal with this sort of behaviour from others before. I feel like I have nowhere to go with it, because the most senior people are just the same. If I complain, I’m worried it’ll affect my reference.

They sound incredibly rude and childish, no wonder you're leaving! Difficult I know but try to let it go over your head, their behaviour is a very poor reflection of them, not you or your job title.

Decades ago, I was a junior manager in a small English company owned by a huge Italian company. The CEO, accompanied by two other board directors, would come over from Italy once a month. The CEO would round up anyone working late in the office and insist they join him and the other directors for a meal in a superb, local Italian restaurant at the company's expense. I love Italian food so needed no persuasion and they were always relaxed, fun evenings. The Italian directors had no concept of "bottom rung". If you worked hard and were loyal, you were treated as an important member of the work family. This was a fundamental part of the company ethos way back then. The company you're currently working for sounds prehistoric and toxic. But not for much longer...!

I’m the same age as you. Has it always been like this? Or did it change at any point?

It’s horrible and makes work a very uncomfortable place to be. Is there any management not involved?