To be worried about ds5 going to sleep so late

[anotheryeargoesby]

He’s still awake and this has been consistent for a while. He’s going to sleep at gone half nine, sometimes ten. I do make sure he’s in bed earlier than this. But he’s just wide awake.

It’s both stressful and selfishly annoying … I just want some time to chill!

What’s his bedtime routine like? What time does he wake up in the morning? Is he active during the day, does he nap? Screen time?

Ps you’re allowed to be selfish…chill time in the evenings is really important too!

I would be getting him up on time and depositing him at school on time even if he’s knackered tbh. He might be more likely to sleep earlier at night.

Put him down at 8pm and leave him to it! He might sit in the dark feeling bored, but so be it.

I assume youre already doing all the classic things ie: no technology 90 mins before bed, bath, soft lighting, calm atmosphere etc...

Thanks … he’s waking up late, around eight o clock. Maybe I should just force him up at 7.

I’ve come down hard on screen time - he was definitely watching too much tv over Christmas but he does do plenty of other stuff too and he spent today at school then did an after school club of gymnastics. I picked him up at 430, home by 440, dinner at 5, shower at 6. He did watch a bit of TV then as I bathed and put sibling to bed. But not excessively I wouldn’t say.

It’s a worry as I don’t want him exhausted at school!

I have a DC like this, and he is just a natural night owl. He refused to nap after 18 months, he couldn't sleep before 10 by the time he started school, and is wide awake and happily reading in bed every morning long before i am up.

He hates sleep, hates his bed, and after years of routines and gimmicks I've given up trying to do anything about it. He goes to bed at 10, and if he is awake and not tired, he can read.

It is different for you, if he is tired though. I'd wake him up earlier, and try to move it back gradually. But i am the last person to ask for advice.

Largely do this but it’s hard to relax knowing at any minute I could get a ‘mummyyyyyy?’ Plus, I am worried about his development!

What time does he wake at?

My 5-year olds have just gone to sleep, but they wake at 8am, so it’s still almost 11 hours.

Thanks @BellRock1234 . It never used to be a problem: there were definitely some nights he’d take longer going to sleep than others but on the whole I’d have said his routine was like clockwork, so this sudden shift is odd. What’s frustrating is he doesn’t even try to sleep - I’ve caught him sat up in bed on occasion.

He has a tonie box and I have considered if that might be the problem or part of the problem but he’s had it since he was three so I wouldn’t have thought so?

Yes, he has been waking at gone 8. He is tired though, he was yawning when I was reading to him.

Would he listen to an audio book or a relaxing meditation story like Mrs honeybee on YouTube? I agree get him up at 7 and hopefully he'll be more tired by the end of the day.

Thanks … I’ll wake him a bit earlier tomorrow. I don’t know if I can bring myself to wake him at 7 but maybe half past? And bring forward gradually.

I have a child who is 8 now and hasn’t needed more than 9.30a-6am since about the age of 6. It’s exhausting. She just doesn’t need that much to be fully charged. My other child needs almost a full 12 hours

I swear I am ready for bed before him tonight

My DS8 has always been a night owl. But we have a set bedtime. He can play in his room until a certain time and then after that he can only read in bed. So we still get an evening, even though he’s awake. Going to bed late makes no difference to what time he wakes in the morning either!

OP I can relate. Child is just 8 and doesn't fall asleep until 9 PM ISH these days. I think this is too late for 8 let alone 5! That downtime in-between parenting is sanity!

So far, DC had a sore toe which I had to inspect. Wants a discussion about a topic I've been initiating all evening because she wouldn't engage. A sore scalp! Miraculously found a water bottle and brought it downstairs (never does it normally, no matter how many times I ask, beg, plead).

DC dropped naps early when she was a baby and has always gone to sleep just a little later than I would like. As much as I want to say I believe we all have different sleep needs, it's not bloody fair when you want a rest from the child before doing it all over again tomorrow!

It's gone quiet. There is hope!

I feel your pain. My ds7 wide awake. Ds10 doesn’t go to bed before 10 also. Exhausted and have no time to myself.

I would aim to have him in bed by 7.30 and lights out at 8. Get him up at 7am every day no matter what time he's gone to sleep. He needs a reset and letting him sleep in isn't going to do that.

I also have a night owl. During the Christmas holiday she almost turned nocturnal. She’s 8 and some nights recently was still awake at 11. Going back to school has helped, but she’s never asleep before 9pm.

She has a Yoto so listens to stories when she can’t sleep but she also feels the need to shout us on the Alexa every 10/15minutes to tell us she can’t sleep which does not help!

I’m going through the same thing with my DD5!