Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Why does it feel like everything is falling apart and it’s my fault?

16 replies

user2466 · 12/01/2026 20:17

My husband and I separated in September after an argument where our toddler was crying and I needed some support with putting her to sleep
whilst trying to juggle other things whilst he was watching F1. It led to a disagreement and he walked out and went to his parents house. He then came back with a suitcase and left.

Just for some context, he has ADHD and autism which he wasn’t aware he had until we got married and I pointed it out to him. He was in denial for a while until we went to the doctors. The first 2.5 years of our marriage were hard. He really struggled with being a husband and a son at the same time. He wouldn’t sit next to me when we’d be around his family (we lived with them for 2.5 years) and he’d run every decision via them including how and when I’d see my own family (who live five hours away).

His parents started to show what I’d call controlling behaviour towards me and I tried to point all the above our to him and he was in denial. We’d had a few arguments at the start and I’d say I want to leave because I was unhappy. He’d feel upset that I wanted to give up on our marriage. Fast forward about 1.5 years he started to see his parents control himself eventually and wanted us both to move out. He developed an understanding our their infliwnce on our marriage and realised how much he’d been controlled his whole life (in his own words). We started planning the move but I unexpectedly fell pregnant. Regardless when I was 7 months pregnant we moved out.

We had our daughter and I thought maybe things with my in laws would change as we now had a baby and didn’t live under their roof. Nope, they still continued trying to tell us how often we should go to their house, and that we had to go over when extended family came over despite having a newborn with a dairy allergy who’d cry all the time. They didn’t respect boundaries and would often just turn up, one time even waking my daughter from her sleep at night because they decides they wanted to see her. After she woke and started crying they left. I mentioned she has a routine and we don want visitors after x time and my mother in law told me I shouldn’t focus on routines like that as I’m setting myself up.

For the most part living in our own house was enjoyable. But the issue was my husband always low level guilt in the background in regards to moving out and choosing his wife. He’s justifyhis decision when they’d try and control him and he even went no contact for months. They’d hardly make an effort with our daughter. Only if we did what they wanted and if it was in front of extended family.

My ex husband struggles with money management and has a lottt of debt. We had a lot of disagreements due to his finances as he worked self employed for Uber but lacked the drive to pay off his debt and manage his finances. I supported him as much as I could but eventually pulled back the financial support as I couldn’t do it anymore. During this time his parents started to guilt trip him again and he started to feel guilt towards them.

We started having more disagreements during this time and I said I. Oils me continue of things didn’t change and he said I’ve always just wanted to leave from the start of the marriage (he’s referring to when I’d say I can’t live with his family anymore due to their behaviour) and he said he felt like an idiot for fighting for us for four years when I want to always leave and that he left his parents house to make me happy and that I still wasn’t happy.

Aftwe the argument asking him to step up financially and as a father whilst he was just sat watching F1 he walked out and came back with a suitcase and left.

Ww’ew currently coparenting but I feel guilty. Like I asked for too much? Or I was unreasonable in asking for more support?

His parents tried to control what I wore, how often I saw my family, my finances, my WhatsApp settings, how much I’d sit in my room when I lived with them, why we didn’t try for a child when his dad wanted us to, they tried to control who I spoke to from their own extended family. They’d try to control what my husband and I spoke about, his dad would ask why I always wear red nail polish and that I should wear other colours too. My husband was told we can’t have our own car and that he has to share with his mum despite the fact that I was now pregnant and we needed our own car.

When I’d get unwell (pregnancy or non pregnancy) I’d be told I’m lying and be told that my husband can’t bring me a drink upstairs because that’s not what their men do.

o feel guilty that I can’t give my daughter a two parent household. I thought is moving out would fix a lot of the issues and apart from the finances we got on well unless his family guilt tripped him. We were like best friends, always laughing and joking together, had similar interests etc

We come from the Asian culture where unmeshment is common and to my husband who once saw all the above as controlling he now says they only tried to guide and help us.

OP posts:
user2466 · 12/01/2026 20:26

Forgot to mention DD has separation anxiety and cries for hours at bedtime she used to sleep well and I’d just have to put her down in her room in her cot and she’d be fine but since the split she struggles a lot. I overcompensated a bit and did a bit of co sleeping whilst we were away dueing the Christmas holidays as she was distressed and now that I’m back to solo parenting she has such bad separation anxiety

OP posts:
tarheelbaby · 12/01/2026 20:34

You are not unreasonable by current British standards but I don't think your in-laws know anything about these. I think that if you and your DH want to live as equals, you will both have to resist your in-laws' controlling nature. If your DH is not willing to extricate himself, it will all be very difficult.

You and your DH should able to manage on your own with DD but he must agree and support this. If his income is through Uber driving, he must put his efforts into this. This might mean that you are solo parenting a little but if your DH is bringing in the readies, that is worth it.

You, yourself, will need to decide on your role in all this and it may be very difficult for you emotionally depending on what you decide.

Childanddogmama · 12/01/2026 20:41

Nothing is your fault, and neither is it falling apart, in time you will realise that you and your daughter will have a much better life away from your ex and his family.

BanglaAmuNet · 12/01/2026 20:42

Congratulations on your beautiful toddler daughter.

Your own post says this isn’t about his family. This is him. A man who watched F1 rather than works to set up a nurturing home environment for his family. A man who walks out on his wife and toddler and goes back to his mum and dad. He probably has no motivation to do anything without his mum and dad telling him. It is NOT to do with you being good enough, or not saying the right combination of words.

He did you a MASSIVE favour walking out. You’ve done four years of this toxic cycle and push and pull of drama, he’s doing it even when his family aren’t there as an influence. Now you can move on and build a loving healthy relationship for your daughter and a bright future for her, with healthy emotional core. If you feel guilty after just four years of their influence, can you imagine what her internal dialogue will be like having spent her whole life with them treating her like a toy? Like a basic need such as her sleep shouldn’t be respected because she’s a toy for their entertainment?

They did not try to guide and help you. If they were guiding and helping you, they would have tried to connect with you, understand you, listen to your hopes and dreams and wishes and had conversation with you, treated you and looked after you when you were unwell - even in the culture the women in the family would have rounded to help you and give you nourishing food.

It will be hard but give your thanks for the toxicity walking out and focus your money and time on your own health, therapy to build healthy dynamics and good sense of self worth (why did you spend so much time trying to fix this guy?) and take that all forward with your beautiful daughter.

“Ww’ew currently coparenting but I feel guilty. Like I asked for too much? Or I was unreasonable in asking for more support?”
Being away from them, doesn’t mean you’re away from the impact of their behaviour and words yet. You were there for a long time, living with them, their words on every aspect of your being and even your rest not-picking away. The guilt reflects the disordered dynamics of the house, not the facts of the matter. You are a strong woman who consistently asked for what your family needed to be healthy and provide a nurturing environment for your daughter.

“I thought is moving out would fix a lot of the issues and apart from the finances we got on well unless his family guilt tripped him. We were like best friends, always laughing and joking together, had similar interests etc”
The moving out showed that HE is the problem. All this time you’ve been excusing his behaviour, blaming his family and your living circumstances. All this time, it’s him, it’s who he is. Relationships and families need integrity, respect, commitment, difficult choices, vulnerability and emotional support. Sharing banter and interests is not enough.

“he said he felt like an idiot for fighting for us for four years”
He should feel like an idiot when he walked out on his newborn daughter and the wife he made a promise and a commitment to.

StrictlyAFemaleFemale · 12/01/2026 20:43

It's not you, it's them. I think you are going to have to concentrate on you and your DD, and leave xh to it. If you have the bandwidth to support him at some time in the future then great, but his family and ADHD is his problem to figure out.

stichguru · 12/01/2026 20:45

I don't think you are being unreasonable, but equally it sounds like your DH maybe either still actually needs help with quite a lot, or has been led to believe he does by his family. If he's been told all his life that he isn't capable of making this or that decision so he has to let mummy do it, then for him to have the confidence to know he can do it without mummy takes a lot. Unfortunately even now "infantilising" those with disabilities or perceived disabilities, is common in many cultures.

BanglaAmuNet · 12/01/2026 20:46

There’s a south Asian MNers board here https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/south-asian-mumsnetters It’s not about British versus Asian values, the way they treated and spoke to you, the way they treat their granddaughter - that is not common across south Asian families. Even without the family, you’ve told us your DH is not working and not a good father by supporting you in parenting.

user2466 · 12/01/2026 20:56

He’d work but not consistently and he’d need probing. He’d spend hours cleaning (he has OCD type symptoms and thinks everything has hair on it) so he’d spend hours hoovering and cleaning and washing everything, he was on the waiting list for support

@stichguru this is exactly it. All his life his decisions were made for him. They chose his wedding outfit, tried to stop him having his own car, his dad tried saying if he ever wanted to move out he should buy the house next door to them one time too, they’d control how often he saw and spoke to my family too, his dad tried telling him how to have sex because he was worried why I wasn’t getting pregnant. Wehen he was younger he told me his dad would drive past his friends houses and stalk him to see if he was there. During an argument whilst we lived there (I was upstairs) his dad slapped him for being a disobedient child but later said it’s because he’s frustrated and cares.

We explicitly said we don’t want photos of our daughter being posted online and despite hardly showing up for her to show her off his dad posted her photo. My ex asked him to remove the picture and told him not to post again and his dad started calling him and shouting at him saying ‘whoever Is saying this f off’ in a message after because he hung up on his dad when he was shouting about the picture being posted. There were two occasions before this where the pic was posted but we gave him the benefit of doubt. The third time he said something and this happened. My ex and his dad didn’t speak for six months after this as my ex was really hurt by the way his dad spoke to him when he tried to put a boundary in place for his daughter but eventually his said ‘I did it because I’m proud of my granddaughter and I’m sorry’ and my husband started feeling guilty. His dad made me write what makes a good and bad wife once when I was unwell when my husband was at work and k was at home and he said one that is unwell isn’t. A good wife it’s not a good luck in front of your husband. He told me to turn my phone off whilst he had this chat with me (probably incase I record it) and also told me to write their bills out and choose four of their bills to learn responsibility

OP posts:
user2466 · 12/01/2026 20:57

I guess I thought that a taste of freedom would allow him to see how restricted his life was but it was almost as though he felt unsafe without their control in the big wide world and saw it as something to be scared of and needed support navigating basic adulthood

OP posts:
BanglaAmuNet · 12/01/2026 21:11

user2466 · 12/01/2026 20:57

I guess I thought that a taste of freedom would allow him to see how restricted his life was but it was almost as though he felt unsafe without their control in the big wide world and saw it as something to be scared of and needed support navigating basic adulthood

You are a smart and astute woman.

”His dad made me write what makes a good and bad wife once when I was unwell when my husband was at work and k was at home and he said one that is unwell isn’t.”
This is outrageous and cruel. What a lack of compassion. He was kicking you when you were down. Please protect your daughter from this.

user2466 · 12/01/2026 21:19

@BanglaAmuNet yep. Even when I had hyperemisis during my pregnancy his dad was saying why am I throwing up past the first trimester and that I must be putting it on. My health needs were always minimised. This is just the tip of the iceberg tbh

OP posts:
BanglaAmuNet · 12/01/2026 21:34

user2466 · 12/01/2026 21:19

@BanglaAmuNet yep. Even when I had hyperemisis during my pregnancy his dad was saying why am I throwing up past the first trimester and that I must be putting it on. My health needs were always minimised. This is just the tip of the iceberg tbh

You deserved so much better. Softness and kindness.

JustWantsSomeSleep · 12/01/2026 21:59

It's not your fault :) Your partner has a lot that he needs help with and I feel that's something he needs to do for himself with his family... and you need to be able to flourish without him. Find someone who will give you what you deserve. Others have more eloquently said the right sorts of things above :)

user2466 · 12/01/2026 22:16

@BanglaAmuNet thank you

OP posts:
user2466 · 13/01/2026 11:54

Thank you. I just cant believe that they all say that this was all in my head and that I just didn’t understand their intentions towards helping us

OP posts:
BeautifulSongsofLove · 14/01/2026 04:52

YANBU

You've been through very difficult relationship experiences and it's tough being a single parent with a toddler,

See the links below, for sleep tips in under 5s and for single parents. There is also support available through your health visitor, and for you through GP should you need it, I wish you all the best

Sleep and young children https://www.nhs.uk/baby/health/sleep-and-young-children/

The Network for South Asian single parents in the UK https://aspnetwork.org.uk/

A Safe Space for Asian Single Parents https://southasianheritage.org.uk/stories-to-tell/a-safe-space-for-asian-single-parents/

nhs.uk

Sleep and young children

Ideas to cope with and manage sleep in young children, including if your child refuses to go to bed.

https://www.nhs.uk/baby/health/sleep-and-young-children

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread