Talking through every single tv show, every single night.

[Noshadealltea]

Just as the title says really. My partner constantly talks or makes random noises or says ‘ok honey? OK HONEY’ at me through every single program we watch. Every night. If I don’t respond it makes him louder. It drives me insane, but he won’t stop.

aibu to next time he does it (tomorrow night) pause the tv and rewind it every single time; or is that too passive aggressive.

So not to drip feed, he is not ND, and I have already spoken to him about how annoying it is 10000000 times.

Problem is, it’s not really questioning. It’s just words and noise and ‘ok honey’ he isn’t asking me if I’m ok, he’s just saying ‘ok honey’ at me. It’s hard to explain. We do talk - of course we do. But it just seems like of an evening we can’t have even 10 minutes of no noise or words.

All the time, I’m not just sat there ignoring him when he asks me a direct question. He just carry’s on.

Is it a tic? If he's just saying it without really expecting an answer.

its good to communicate, and he’s really not meaningfully doing that.

Are you on your period? I'm past the menopause now, but when I was younger and on or just before a period, the slightest things would annoy me, even the sound of my husband breathing, it doesn't bother me now, it lets me know he's still alive 😂

Given that its generally accepted that people who are ASD go undiagnosed and the diagnosis rate is under rated, its not so straightforward to say he definitely isnt ND

As someone said above, whats wrong with him to keep repeating this, it sounds like a verbal tic and possibly impulsive and compulsive behaviour, having to speak, having to comment, having to ask, all the time. You've asked him not to, again that disregard is possibly due to to not processing what you have told him nad not understnding the impact on you could be another sign

I would ask him to go out for an emergency ingredient that you suddenly need, each and every time. Watch your telly programmes on your own.

Mine never shuts up either. It doesn’t matter how often I ask him not to talk, he seems incapable of buttoning it. He keeps asking if he can pause the tv to make a plot prediction. Just incessant waffle.

My housemate can’t watch a programme without commenting on what other roles the actors have had, who sang the tracks and what else they’ve sung, what era the show must be set in judging by the cars. It’s endless. And then I get asked if I’ve heard of said actors, bands etc. I got asked if I’d heard of ABBA the other day. The most annoying is when he explains basic science to me when I have a sodding physics degree.

I really hope it's not this, but posessive controlling people can have a problem with you even enjoying watching something or listening to music.

But giving him the benefit of the doubt for the moment (because hopefully that's not it and because it's a whole other conversation if he were AND because it's unfair to jump to that conclusion if he was not, controlling that is, if you're still following :-D), I would tell him again during a calm, quiet moment before tv time that it's annoying and you are tired and just want to be silent. Say you've told him a number of times so from now on between such and such a time you want silence. Start with half an hour and then build it up. Give him a prior warning that you will go to the other room and watch tv between those times if he talks.

If he still does it and it's obvious he's not even trying, get up and go into the other room for the allotted time. He should learn!

Seriously?
I’m way past menopause, and generally quite laid back. The behaviour the op describes sounds intolerable.

How about pausing the tv and saying to him very clearly, ‘I would be OK if you just stopped talking all the bloody time when I’m trying to watch this, please just watch the programme or go and do something else’.

Some people need things spelling out very clearly, I don’t care if this could be taken as rude, his constant interruptions are rude.

😬

Could you dose him up with a large tub of Pringles and share bags of Haribo and his favourite chocolate to keep him busy AND quiet? Like you would a child at the cinema.

Yep!

Jesus Christ.

Have you asked him to stop?

It is not good to talk all the way through a tv show that someone’s trying to watch.

It’s not caring.

It’s annoying.

I know posters on MN are often against direct communication, but how have you not asked him why he does this?

When you say you’ve spoken to him about how annoying it is - have you directly said ‘I do not like this, please stop doing it’? If so, what’s his justification for still doing it?

Deepest sympathy OP. My partner, talks through the beginning of every single TV programme we watch. Every single one. He says oh that's ...names random actor then proceeds to tell me everything he knows about whoever it is. It's really, really irritating. Could you try turning off the TV when he starts, say oh you obviously need to talk to me, and only put it back on when he bloody shuts up?

This is somewhat similar to what I’m thinking. I was going to ask about possible OCD tendencies. My youngest has OCD and, although it’s primarily around contamination, he goes through phases of reassurance seeking. He will repeat certain words or phrases and wants me to respond in a way that satisfies him (and feeds his OCD).

Me and my husband both do it, so I can't see what the problem is. I'm only ever half watching the telly anyway, so it doesn't matter if I miss a bit. If there was something that I really wanted to see, without any interruptions, I'd put it on the planner and watch it when I was on my own.

"aibu to next time he does it (tomorrow night) pause the tv and rewind it every single time; or is that too passive aggressive."
Definitely not unreasonable. But personally I'd be more inclined to take the 'Shut. The. Fuck. Up!' route. I know you said that "If I told him to shut the fuck up, I garuntee there would be moody silence, but not from me 😅, for about 10 minutes" - not seeing the problem, since you "just wanted a bit of quiet". Even ten minutes, that looks like a win to me.

Have you considered putting him under the patio? That would get you unlimited (and non-moody) silence.

God help you.
He sounds like a complete moron.
Think long and hard about having another child with such a twit.

That sounds horrendous OP.

My FIL and MIL talk over programmes and I was ready to strangle them over Christmas. Exactly as other posters said banging on about what other programmes actors have been in. Asking questions about whether I have seen such and such. Telling me all about an actor who probably died around the time I was born... The worst part was the quiz shows, shouting out answers even when I asked them not to repeatedly. Had to reiterate the rule that you can't shout out 'I've got it' or what the answer is on the 1% club until the times up as it's not fun for anyone else... half the time they've got the bloody answer wrong anyway as they didn't read the question.

Honestly, it's so nice to be honest breathes sigh of relief

Has your OP always done this or is it a recent thing?

This is why I am not one to mourn the decline of collective TV viewing. I much prefer watching things on an individual device so that I can be spared the witterings of certain family members.

Play him this song, kind of gives a subtle message 😀🎶
Shut The Fck Up