Is this too much to ask?

[thismummyslife]

I’m not asking to go on a night out with friends, not asking to go and get my nails done or go shopping, not asking to have a bubble bath or a nap, simply asking for my DH to watch the kids whilst I do a deep clean? And it NEVER happens! How does everyone keep on top of things?

Your DH is a knob. Sorry.

Er... why are still with such an arsehole?

He can do the deep clean. Useless parent

I keep on top of things easily because my DH isn't a twat.

Sorry yours is.

I suggest you think about your options.

What the heck! If he won’t watch his kids, pass him the mop & bucket. Or even better, show him the door.

Why are you having to ask him anything, you are supposed to be in it together.

What age are the children?

So do you actually go on nights out with friends and on shopping trips on your own or is that not possible as you make it sound like that's completely unreasonable

Your husband shouldnt be “watching” his kids like he’s doing you a favour. He’s their parent, he was 50% responsible for creating them and is still 50% responsible for them now.

Want more for yourself, raise your bar and don’t accept less than any woman, partner and parent deserves.

By not living with such a useless wanker. It is something you should consider.

How does everyone keep on top of things?

I have a DH who cares about me.

Just get on and do it. If a child comes up to you to ask something, tell them go ask dad. If they did something, go ask dad.

Yeah, it shouldn’t be like that.

Leave him the mop, bucket, cloths and sprays, tell him you are taking the DC to the cinema and for pizza and when you get back, you expect the place to be spotless from top to bottom.

Why can't he look after his own kid? Why's he not joining in the deep clean? Why's it all on you?

how does everyone else keep on top of things?
I have a dh who actually cares about his family. Either you tell him to do the deep clean or watch the kids, stop being a wet blanket.

I keep on top of things because my husband isn't a bellend and is happy to do his fair share around the house.

Oh come on op, why are you putting up with this?

I don't think it would be unreasonable to ask your partner to watch the kids while you did any of those things listed. Mine wouldn't bat an eyelid.

None of the other requests in your list are extraordinary either though @thismummyslife…he’s an asshole!

Unless you are the Virgin Mary and your partner is God, then none of those things are unreasonable. He provided 50% of the DNA for your children, and unless he actually is the Almighty then he should be doing 50% of the parenting of them.

Get dh (and kids if possible) to muck in so it takes half the time! I do bathrooms, dh is on dusting and hoovering and dd mops the floors. I assume he's doesn't float over the surfaces and also contributes to the mess. There's very few jobs that a penis prevents you from doing and wielding a duster is not among them.

He has a choice ... ckean or kids. He's a lazy ass.

I probably haven’t really explained it well, I ask him to look after them every weekend so I can do a deep clean but then he insists on doing his ‘jobs’ beforehand, by the time he’s completed all his ‘tasks’ I’m putting the kids to bed and then by the time I’ve done the nighttime routine of prepping, general tidying, it’s past 9 and I really don’t fancy scrubbing the house, changing beds, washing etc all those household things then whilst he cracks open a beer! Thanks for the advice, I think I’ll be having a serious talk with him!

His jobs include having a tidy of the garage, washing the car, pottering in the garden, my argument is what’s the point in the garage being organised when no one’s got clean undies and the bathrooms minging! We have a baby, so that’s why someone needs to watch them.

I think you need to lay out to him that his 'jobs' don't automatically get priority and that you'd like to be able to get on with YOUR 'jobs'. None of his are essential things that need to be done every week!