To think my ex good friend has lost the plot?!

[Hellskitchen24]

Quick background. I have an 8 month old. Ex good friend who made all sorts of fabulous promises about being there, seeing loads of me and the baby etc, hasn’t. I’ve seen her twice in 8 months. Every month or so she sends a passive aggressive (or just aggressive?!) text saying I haven’t been there for her, I never think of her etc. Basically makes it all about her. Never asks me how I am, how my little one is etc. Today she sent me a text saying what a terrible person I am and never contact her again, but to send back a gift she gave me about 6 years ago?! I’ve left it on read and am considering blocking her now. It’s a shame as we used to be close but I think she’s lost the plot.

That’s very op blaming! As if it’s on op to sort and its her fault the friend is being batshit!
@Hellskitchen24 agree with those who advise of the block back and ignore, she knows where you live should she wish to write to you to apologise for the madness!

She fell out with her family a couple of years ago but it’s not new.

Definitely a big element of this. I’m a single parent btw so no partner. I did put loads of effort into our friendship before but obviously solo parenting takes up almost all of my time so can’t prioritise her.

Is just block her and not respond at all

If she's sending you nasty aggressive messages, I'd just block her. You don't need someone like that in your life! Send back the watch if you feel like it, then just move on with your life!

You have a baby. She needs to readjust her expectations.

Of course you’re going to prioritise your baby and of course your life will change. You’re no longer the young, free singleton, but a parent now.

It takes two to tangle, so to speak, so she could make the effort to see you. But it sounds like she wants to be the centre of attention, and feels usurped by the baby. I. An almost guarantee that when she gas a baby, she will come crying back to you.

Put the friendship behind you, join a mum and baby group, and go and make new friends.

Jealous? Why does everyone assume that all women want babies?

I just clicked on the list of ‘similar threads’ that popped up below this thread, and noticed you posted before. People suggested then explaining that your circumstances have now changed (which should be obvious!) and suggest she comes to you more etc, and/or let the friendship fade away as she’s not want you need.

in light of the new post, I definitely think it’s time to ditch the friendship. From the first thread, she sounded like a demanding drama lama and that hasn’t changed. Time to move on.

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/5410864-for-expecting-my-friend-to-make-more-of-an-effort-versus-me-when-i-am-newly-post-partum

I would also take this approach. I've only ever blocked one person. Maybe she will snap out of it.

She's probably upset that she's not a priority for you now you have a baby. Some people just need to be the centre of attention.

She didn't get the reaction she wanted with the texts, so she's raised the stakes to engage you, which has clearly worked, because you're trying to work her out.

I wouldn't give her any more energy.

Yes same person. I’m done now. Totally done.

I had a friend who suffered from depression and she did eventually become angry and paranoid as well. She judged herself harshly and she also judged me harshly and had a lot of bitterness about things I had and hadn't done. I don't see her anymore but I do miss her as she was in some ways the most interesting and intelligent friend I've ever had. People are complicated!

Well the signs of her being unreasonable were there before your baby arrived so time to let her pop off. The return of the watch is an insane demand. I expect she's done this so she can in some weird way stay in contact with you as you argue over it. "I don't have it anymore/lost it/was mugged wearing it on my last holiday". "No I'm not sending you £115 for it" and so on.

Never thought of it this way and it makes sense. She’s got a reaction of out of me every time before but I’ve just read it and ignored it now.

Just block her now and forget about it.