Christmas gifts (yet another one!)

[Slightlyperplexed]

One of our 4 children completely 'forgot' to give us a a present this year. He's not known to be forgetful. There's been no fall out. Should we nudge or leave well alone?
From family chatter we were the only ones left out!

Adult child?
Or child child?

Assuming he’s an adult how can someone forget to give Christmas presents , even receiving other gifts didn’t jog his memory . I’d ask him because there may be something else going on .

Similar thing happened with me. I've gone non-contact. My family has taken his side which has really annoyed me. I certainly won't be getting him anything for his 6th birthday next month.

I’d be hurt if he’d managed something for everyone else and left me out! Not because I need stuff, but because I’d feel forgotten, and wonder whether I’d upset him. I’ve had times when one of the kids has been unable to afford gift-giving, but they’ve always told me in advance, and I’d either give them money or just tell them it doesn’t matter. This is different, though. I’d probably have to make a gentle inquiry as to whether I’d done something to upset him, though I wouldn’t make it all about the Christmas present.

what age? did he give everyone else? has he lost his job or anything.

id be asking if everything was ok, has he got enough cash etc, and have we upset you or something that meant you didn’t want to give us a present as it’s not like you.

Context would be helpful here.. but regardless, he didn't forget he has parents, or when Christmas is.

Maybe his wife refused to shop for him this year?

Maybe he's trying to soft launch not getting presents at all. Bit cowardly not to actually have the conversation but you could start it by saying you noticed and if he wants to stop doing Christmas presents that's fine. Then he has the opportunity.

Seems weird if they got everyone else gifts… could it have got lost in the post?

This is a joke right?

Hysterical! 😂

Yes, this would make sense!

Why do you care? Christmas is not about the gifts, I have three close relatives who don't buy me a gift, I still buy for them, my choice.
I am by no means well off, if anything they are better off than me but it is my choice.

😂😂😂

How did he announce the ‘forgetting’ assuming adult child here

You don’t ask someone for a gift. Just match their energy next time

Adult child, good job!

Pretty sure she's being serious. She's got a long-standing thread on the logistics of going NC with a 6yo.

😂😂😂

Did you see him at Christmas, could it have been lost in the post and he's wondering why you haven't said thank you?!

Does he have money troubles? Gambling issues?! Any reason he would be broke? What excuse did he give?

I wouldn’t make a big fuss about it, or try any kind of emotional guilt tripping, but I might just check in to ask whether you missed his gift somehow because it seemed really unlike him not to bother and you don’t want to be ungrateful.

MH issue maybe.

There’s a possibility according to another MNetter that this isn’t actually a joke! 😬

No, just one of the latest parenting trends. The opposite of helicopter parenting, if you will, to create more resilient kids. You should read up on NC parenting for 0-18. It's a really interesting theory.

Actually it just hasn't been mentioned