I didn't know where to post this, I'm not being unreasonable, neither is anyone else but don't know how to deal with this situation.
It's my DD's 1st birthday next Friday, we are not doing anything on the day but on Sunday we have arranged to get together with some of the family for lunch, we were thinking a carvery in the town where my mum lives. My aunty, who lives in the same town has just text me and said "why don't we do it in our garden, we can all bring something. I'll maker her a chocolate birthday cake".
Firstly I'm not sure I want to do it at hers, there is not enough room in the house if it rains, and it's also a faff if everyone has to bring something, I don't want to have to co-ordinate what everyone brings, just thought it would be easier if we all went out. Secondly I want to make DD's birthday cake. it's her first birthday, I've even hired a "1" cake tin and bought a piping bag to ice it (not quite sure how to use it yet ).
The thing is I don't want to offend my aunty, and she probably would be offended. She does make nice cakes (she made our wedding cake) but it just want it to be hassle free and make my own DD's first birthday cake. It's my mum's sis and I have tried calling her to ask her advice but no answer yet, and to be honest I will probably end up doing whatever she says (that's a whole other AIBU thread) and she will probably say "dn't be so selfish, let aunty XXX do it at hers".
What do I do? I don't want to have to do it someone else's way just because they offered. I might concede on doing it at hers (though DH won't be happy) if I don't have to organise it (but what if it rains) but I want to make the cake myself, how do I let her down, and am I really being unreasonable?