What can I do?

[YourBrightZebra]

Hi, I’m early thirties and I’m disabled in a whole host of ways. But I don’t want my life to be like this forever. I feel like such a burden on society in general, even though I am very much loved at home with a great family.
I have a long list of disabilities. I can barely leave the house - I can’t leave in the summer as I have heat intolerance and I can’t leave in the winter due to cold urticaria. Yet I feel like I’m not doing enough - maybe it’s the media, maybe it’s the fact I don’t want to believe I’m as poorly as I am, or maybe it’s because I don’t look typically disabled.
I’d look for work, but being so immunocompromised, I’m constantly ill. Who would want to hire someone who is constantly off sick? (I was actually fired for this before!)
AIBU to accept this life?

You need a WFH job.

I'm severely immune compromised and also constantly sick. Having the ability to work from home is what keeps me in the workforce. Most days I can power through as I don't have to face the commute or effort it takes. It also means I'm have more down time to rest and recover between shifts.

I'll take a guess and say it's something autoimmune like MS? There are options out there, you just need to find them.

Why do you feel that you are a burden on Society? People with disabilities have the right to exist like anybody else.

Really sorry to hear this OP, I work in the tech sector fully remotely and have colleagues who are disabled and working with adapted work hours / setups so it can be possible in some industries however you are also at the mercy of having a nice HR department that doesn't penalise sickness leave. (I work specifically in data in case you're interested in specifics, but software engineering can be similarly flexible)

Is there anything you'd be be interested and capable of doing on an ad hoc /self employed basis? E.g. I teach music on the side fully remotely.

One of my friends set up a business doing nutrition plans and coaching, again fully remotely and self employed. Another friend is an online doula

I think if you're not currently working at all, then you have some flexibility to pick up and play around with what interests you and brings in some money and then naturally build up from there. You're probably safest being your own boss, but appreciate that that comes without the protections that employment can provide (e.g sickness and holiday pay)

Could you set up your own small (or BIG) business?

Find a wfh job?

Would studying online make you feel better?

I have severe autoimmune issues and life threatening neutropenia, but I work around it by working from home in a very highly respected job with a good salary. Yes I work from bed because of the pain, but in the grand scheme of things, it doesn’t matter because I’m working making a decent living for myself and have a high flying career. It’s possible with the right attitude and right healthcare support around you

I suffer with a long list of allergy i cant even use soap or shampoo.

Edited for spellings and the fact i went on a ramble.

I also have a sun intolerance, pretty miserable thing to have but I live in Scotland so it's not too bad!

I also have CSU as well as cold urticaria. It’s taken 10 years but I’ve finally found medication that helps - but not cured. It’s a horrible condition

Sorry about that i went in to a long ramble so changed it quickly as its not about me its about op.

The sun it makes life hard and it wont get better i dread summer.

Have you worked before? What kind of skills do you have, and what interests you work wise?
There's so much stuff that's wfh now. So think if what you can do, rather than what you can't.

But of course you're not a burden on society. It just would obviously be good for your self esteem to work. But if you can't then that's fine as far as I'm concerned.

Sorry you are feeling like this. I sometimes feel similarly, although more that I am a burden on my DH and kids rather than society in general. I don't currently work. I used to be a civil servant but had to give it up as I couldn't commute and didn't feel able to manage a team, deal with all the deadlines and meetings stress. Voluntary redundancy came up and I agonised but eventually took it. But now I have no idea how to get a job that would allow me to work part time from home. It's not just the physical challenges (I don't even have a confirmed diagnosis) but the brain fog is awful and I can't operate the way I used to. My confidence is also at an all time low.

It's good to hear that some PPs have managed to get/stay in high flying careers/rest. Has anyone started something completely new? I don't have skills to teach/tutor anything. I don't have professional qualifications. I used to have good management and policy skills but I don't think I could do that kind of work now.
I just want something low stress, part time and wfh. Accepting that means likely low pay but i don't even know where to start.

I hope you can take up some of the kind advice of others on the thread. Best wishes x

My brother used to teach English as a foreign language online. Adult learners tended to be very motivated and easy to work with. Could that potentially work for you?

You don't need to know their local language if you use the TEFL framework to teach from

Dont ever feel you are not good enough. All people are different. You can retrain to manage a job at home part time maybe, or craft something to sell on Etsy ( home made items) do an online course so you do not have to go out.

many people are immune compromised. I have a blood disorder, and it is a life changing event to have to be aware of people and catching viruses etc.

Change your thinking, write what you can achieve and do things, hobbies, or re train.

An example of your worth, you will be important to someone. I worked for many years in mental health and just one happy comment, compliment or chat and a cup of tea was enough to stop someone going into deep depression or worse. You are valuable as you are x

I'm wondering if it's possible to be a remote/virtual companion to someone? I remember reading a few stories (e.g. Rebecca) where someone's job would be to befriend someone rich and lonely - could be worth searching if there are companies out there that could pair you up or you could organically try and set up a befriending service by yourself? Could also be somewhere people could practice their English skills so could be multiple groups that could benefit from this type of service