How would you split Christmas? North, South and Ireland?

[aboutright]

Mum in Dublin.
My Family in the North.
Husband’s in the South.

We live 1 hour drive away from husband’s family.

We have two girls, 5&9.

Every year so far we’ve been up and down the bloody A1 visiting here and there. We have a lovely time for the most part, just the logistics are killing us. Plus we’ve not really started making any proper traditions of our own.

Have never been to see my mum for Christmas and she’s keen to have us this layering on another complication.

This year packing up the car with all the presents to open in an Airbnb just felt really annoying. Ideally I’d love to have at least Christmas morning in our own house.

What on earth should we do?!

Have Christmas in your own home. Tell family they are welcome at yours if they wish (if you don’t have the room they can stay nearby in a hotel/B&B/holiday lets). If you’ve been travelling to them for the past few years then tell them it’s their turn now (but be prepared for them not to come. DP and I have visited our joint families at the other end of the country many for years, a couple of years ago we announced that it was their turn to travel to us and only one couple has visited us since).

Sounds simple, 1st year at your own home, the next year at your mums, the following year your husband's family.

I've gotten to the stage where I please my kids, husband and myself. It can be exhausting keeping everyone happy.

Just stay home. I think it is really what children want at Christmas. Family can visit you.

Stay at home.

Anyone who wants to see you can book a nearby hotel, etc.

Stop dragging your kids around to please others.

Feels unfairly weighted to my husbands family though. Which is a double shame - I MUCH prefer my family

Stay at home. Christmas is for
children , if everyone else is desperate to be part of it they can visit you. I spent my childhood Christmases driving up and down the A1 too. It was shit.

Stay at home, a per pp if family are desperate to see you, they’ll do what they’re expecting you to do! Travel and air b nb

My DC definitely prefer seeing family and don't feel that they're being "dragged." Even now they're 18 and 14, they still say they would rather spend the day with family regardless of having to drive. I don't think the rhetoric on here is always accurate.

However, if what you're doing now isn't working then something needs to change and it sounds to me like you want to see your family but also want to be fair. We used to alternate once upon a time and then we would have two Christmases, one on the day and a second celebration a few days later. Nowadays, we have a bigger house so we host.

You need to be a bit creative and try to think of Christmas as a season rather than a single day. It gives you much more scope.