Do bedtime stories still work?

[JayGardener]

is it just in movies or do kids actually love bedtime stories? If yes, what kind?

Trying not to be judgy but I guess I'm a bit incredulous. I genuinely can't imagine not reading to my kids at bedtime. Sometimes we skip it with my 1.5 year old as he gets too overstimulated but he loves looking at books during the day. It's how he's learned the majority of his vocab tbh! Pointing at cows, sheep, learning colours etc.

My 4 year olds fave bit of the day is bedtime stories, we had to get a bit strict and limit it to 1-2 a night otherwise bedtimes were taking forever. But this is a really important part of the day where we read, snuggle, she tells me things she didn't tell me during the day or asks questions etc. Her comprehension skills are so good and I doubt that would have happened without stories.

Did you never read with your kids, like even their school phonics books etc? Do they read by themselves currently?

If you want to read to both the 8 and 12 year old together, something like Harry Potter or the Hobbit would probably work well. Bonus points if you can put on some different voices for the characters!

Yes! read them the Diary of a Wimpy Kid books at bed time, they’ll appeal to both ages xxx

You've never read to your children in 12 years???

Why did you think this was OK?

Agreed, I'm incredulous! As parents we are constantly bombarded with literature about how important it is to read to our children regularly. OP keeps posting "😅" emojis like it's amusing they've missed such an important part of parenting.

My twins are almost 8, I’ve been reading to them at bedtime every night since they were 6 months old.

I do hope they become avid readers and obviously do always want them to go to bed well, but I haven’t read to them primarily for these reasons. Reading daily to children has been shown to expand vocabulary and improve general outcomes.

Only 1 in 5 children are read to daily by a parent.

Definitely this. And read in an engaging manner too.

Is this a windup thread? You’ve been a parent for over a decade and are only now realising that you ought to read to your kids? Have you existed in a bubble for all of that time?

Goodness I can’t imagine even asking this question.
I’ve read to my toddler since he was born - those black and white books and ones with mirrors, now we’ve progressed to lots more variety. Books are out all day and we nearly always have books before bed and naps- I like to think it helps them predict it’s sleep time next and therefore will sleep better 🫠
(I don’t want to derail but if anyone has any suggestions for books for a 20 month old…)

Only 1 in 5 children are read to daily by a parent.

This is really sad. However, OP has apparently never read to his kids at all. And one of them is 12. That’s next level.

My son insists on a story every night. Some nights it's a book but mostly he's asking for a one I make up. We have a character called Bob who owns a football team and a restaurant chain and I make up different stories about him which my son loves. It's nothing special, I'm certainly no story teller but my son is happy with whatever I come up with.

Generally, children enjoy bedtime stories not just for the story, but because it allows them to be close to their parent and spend time just being together without any pressure to 'do' anything. It's never too late to start something new.

Don't feel beholden to what the school or others tell you are the books you 'should' be reading for your kids' ages. Whatever you and they like is fine. Picture books are still a good read in year 5, as well as more indepth stories.

Take a look at 'Drbillen_thereadingprofessor' on instagram. I can't say I personally agree with her choice of book titles, but she is very encouraging and gives the sort of tips you seem to be after - why it's important for parents to read with their children, the impact it has etc.

Just seen your DC are 8 and 12.

We were still reading to our DC at these ages, although sometimes the DC read to us!

At 12, your eldest may not want this if they're not used to it, but definitely worth giving it a try if they're amenable.

What are your DC's interests? If we can get an idea, posters may be able to suggest books they will like.

Here are some brilliant books my DC - one girl and one boy - have both enjoyed from age 8+.

• the Tom Gates series
• the Scribble Witch series
• Harry Potter series (good for all ages!)
• The Accidental Pirates: Voyage to Accidental North (first in a series. Beautifully written)
• How to Train your Dragon series

- the Frostheart trilogy

For slightly older kids, maybe 9 - 12

• Warrior Cats
• My life as a cat - I really enjoyed reading this one
• the Murder Most Unladylike series - my daughter especially loved these!
• His Dark Materials series by Phillip Pullman

At 12 they're getting more into young adult fiction. Some of which I wouldn't want to read with my DC as we'd find any romance aspect cringy to read together!

But His Dark Materials, Harry Potter and Murder Most Unladylike are still very enjoyable at this age, and your older DC may well enjoy listening in to stories for their sibling too.

My 12.5 yo DD is really into the Hunger Games at the moment, she reads it herself though so I'm not sure about the cringy romance aspect!

12 is also a great age to get into sci fi.

My DS really enjoyed The Hitchikers Guide to the Galaxy at this age (as did I, many years ago).

Have fun discovering new worlds together!

I always loved reading to mine and now I read the same books to my grandchildren. I can’t imagine not reading to them.

@JayGardener do they like reading?

The OP is asking for help with establishing reading with his DC.

What's better - to recognise this is a good thing and support him (and others reading the thread) to do this?

Or to castigate him for not doing it in the past, make him feel bad, potentially drive him off the thread and prevent him getting the support he's asked for?

If you think reading is so important, I suggest the first is the wise option. Else, you're just here to enjoy having a go, which isn't the moral high ground you seem to think you occupy.

Our 8 year old DD loves bed time stories. We’ve had the same evening routine for years. Obviously the books have changed to chapter vs. picture books. If kids can’t read, they can’t learn. Favourite books we’ve recently read: The Witches, The Demon Dentist, Gangsta Granny, George’s Marvellous Medicine, those awful fucking fairy books.

I read to mine every night as part of their bedtime routine

My son has just turned 8 and we still read to him every night.

He likes:

The Tom Gates books by Liz Pichon
The Witches - Roald Dahl
Charlie and the Chocolate Factory
Toto the Ninja Cat - Dermot O'Leary
The Mr Gum books - Andy Stanton
The Sherlock Bones books - Tim Collins
The Agent Weasel Books - Nick East

I want to get him on to the Chronicals of Narnia as they were a favourite of mine.

We get most of our books from charity shops for 50p - £1, as I'm a tight arse. Local library is also good as you can order in what you want online.

Well, consider my flabber thoroughly gasted. Still, never too late to start I suppose. Do the children read at school or by themselves for leisure? What do they enjoy reading?

We read to our kids at bedtime, I think it’s good to read to them every day and I can already see a love for reading developing in DD1 (who’s 3). I’m not sure it really helps my DC get to sleep but it’s a good part of the routine that helps them know it’s time to settle down.

Ignore the shitty comments op it's great you are looking to start.

The first step is to model reading as a leisure activity yourself to normalise this vs scrolling when you have a spare 10 minutes. As they are a bit older maybe you could get them on board with a family shift - say you'd like to start reading and would they be willing to get involved too? Depending on their age/maturity you might need to acknowledge the oldest is getting a bit past bedtime stories but could they just humour you and go along with it to get youngest on board - you could all find a book you like together and share reading for example? And it doesn't just have to be bedtime - sunday mornings in our bed was another time we'd pick it up if it was a particularly engaging book and we all wanted to keep going.

My kids used to love the voices I did for all the characters and still remember them - I watching TV with one of my now adult children just the other day and a scottish woman was talking and DS pipes up "hey mum she sounds just like the your witch in Room on the Broom. Really melted my heart.

I'd suggest Lion, the Witch & the Wardrobe before you tackle something like meatier like Harry Potter. They are a bit shorter and a lovely mix of fantasy vs reality, some fantastic characters and if you enjoy the first one you can go straight onto the next plus there are films which are great to watch AFTER you've read the book (books are nearly always better)

We all love a bedtime story in our house. My teenagers still enjoy reading their old favourite to my toddlers still

At their age I’d look to see if their any tie in books to their favourite shows, film or games and definitely take them to get library cards and let them pick books themselves from the library.

Also, back when our local library had a cafe my friend had success getting her reluctant reader interested by taking him for a cake every time they went to the library to pick out books 😂

Do not read Mummy I Love You to your 12 year old.

You’d be better with Harry Potter, Series of Unfortunate Events, Famous Five or Percy Jackson.

Do your kids not read to themselves at bedtime at those ages?

My parents never did bedtime stories - I still grew up a reader - IL never did either and DH reads as well.

We did them till DD2 was 5- DS 7 and DD1 9-10 - older they got harder it got TBH - I was tried they were increasingly not interested/not wanting to sleep/wanting to row about what was read or generally pick fights. It wasn't always the bonding comfortable experience I've always seen it portayed as.

Then we moved house which was exhausting so switched to audio books - they had own rooms and cd players. Steven Fry,Tony Robinson and various others started reading them at bedtime - a huge range of classics and modern books- which worked a lot better for all of us.

Yep. I don’t really know what bedtime would look like without a story to calm everyone down!

My 4yo loves everything from simple ‘baby’ board books still, which he had when he was younger (quick, predictable, good pictures), to longer picture books (like Julia Donaldsovor traditional tales like Goldilocks)

My 8yo loves pictures books about animals and then the 13 Storey Treehouse series, as well as non-fiction things about football, history or Guiness World Records. He reads to himself too but we still never miss at least 10 minutes of us reading to him before bed.

If reading to both of them at the same time, they love anything a bit rude or silly. The Father Christmas needs a Wee and Father Christmas Comes up Trumps have been favourites the last few weeks!

We’ve always used the local library. If they don’t like a book, you’ve not wasted any money and if they find one they absolutely love you can buy a copy! Win, win!