Job grief - is it a real thing?!

[Throwmoneyatit]

I've read that it is, and I certainly feel it!

Today is the last day of my three month notice period and the last time I'll walk out of these doors.

I've been here for just over six years. I'm well regarded and have moved up the ranks to the point that I can't move further up or push myself.

I've been tentatively keeping an eye on the job market for about two years now and four months ago, I applied for a new job and I was offered the position with a unanimous vote from everybody on the panel. I was over the moon although hesitant.

It's a step up, a good wage increase and more responsibility. I was finding in my current role, that I was getting bored, unchallenged and my mental health was taking a hit. As it's also a different industry (similar job), there is more scope to move up and I will be taking on extra qualifications.

So why am I feeling so fragile today? Is it grief of leaving something I know so well? Is it worry about the new challenges that I face? Is it everything that I've described?

It's also been such a long time since interview to now, although I've had regular contact with my new employers and I'm consciously trying to remember how I was feeling when I'd finished the interview process, as it was a much nicer feeling than I'm having today. In all honesty, I've been worrying about it for the last couple of weeks.

Has anybody had a similar experience? I know I'll cry as I'm already feeling tears stinging my eyes. I'm so worried I've made the wrong decision. I'm the highest earner at home and I'm so worried I've made the wrong decision!

Have you felt like this and it's worked out, better than you thought and you wonder why you ever worried?

Thank you!

Oh, I think this is very natural. It's the end of an era, for better or worse. And it's easy to start getting nostalgic and the rose-tinted glasses go on. Also... change is not always easy to deal with, even if it's a positive one. There are likely to still be things you miss about your current workplace.

Go easy on yourself. It's ok to have a little cry.

I think it is normal if you are leaving a place that fundamentally you like, there is nothing really wrong with the job, you are not escaping an awful boss - definitely there will be some sadness and fear of the unknown!

Well done on getting the new job that you worked hard for .
I suggest you are just having a wobble which is understandable.
Shed a tear and take your happy memories of the good times you had in your current place and the growth you attained .
Remember you looked for a new job for a reason.
Once you settle in to your new role you will be fine .
Have done this a few times and it all worked out in the end !
Good luck !

I felt exactly like this too. Change is hard and takes time to process. I also had huge feelings of worrying I was making a mistake and had quite a lot of anxiety with it. One or more things can be true at the same time. It’s ok to have feelings of sadness and loss as you leave something that has fundamentally been a positive in your life, and also to approach the new job positively. It’s important to acknowledge the feelings of sadness and loss.

Thank you all, very much appreciated.
Such a whirlwind of emotions tonight! Everyone who I have worked with over the last few years were amazing, took me out for a quick leaving drink and I have been told there will always be a job if I needed it, which has stirred my emotions up a little bit more!
Just randomly keep bursting into tears! I keep reading the paperwork and handbooks etc for new job and I don't know if I'm making things worse for myself! I'm slowly convincing myself that I'm not up for the challenge!

Three meringues with squirty cream down into my mourning period 🤣

I hear you. I left my job of nearly 6 years for a role I've coveted for years and was incredibly proud to get as there was a massive volume of applications.
However I felt incredibly sad leaving the old job. It was all ok until after 5 weeks in I had some planned leave and, for some reason I really struggled going back. I'm over that now and really feel I'm in the right job.

I do believe so. I lost my job this time last year and I still miss it somewhat. In hindsight it was a good thing and l would not have had more than another 12 months left anyway due to my disability. I have been able to work things out and put things in place to help me before I get so bad its too late. I would rather have left my job on my terms, when i chose, bu it wasn't to be and it was hard to come to terms with after 12 years of loyal service could be disregarded over two silky mistakes.

Me. I’ve cried so many times, before and after each interview even. And I’m not a crier. Loved the people I worked with, it’s broken my heart. New job (which is fab and I know I will love and settle well in, and is right for me for future) starts Monday. But yes, grief. I think it’s the unnaturalness of how work bonds are cut when you leave.

It’s just change. Many of us are impacted by it, even those who like change. It’s a significant change in your life, you spend a lot of time at work and with those people. Even if you don’t really like work you will have some kind of attachment to it because it’s just what you know. I wouldn’t think too deeply about it.

I think it's normal and common.
I've left jobs I didn't particularly love or have a strong desire to stay at, but still felt an odd heartache at the thought of that part of my life being over. The last time I'll sit at that desk or use that kitchen or sit at that table in the break room. It's an odd feeling, almost nostalgic.

I think it's just all the emotions of saying goodbye to safety/security and hello to a new challenge.

Feel it for a bit and then put it away and knock em out in your new job.

Good luck.

Good luck in your new job!

Its only natural for feel anxious about what is ahead of you.

I left a professional job to go to uni as a mature student. I had worked in the job since I was 16 and it felt very strange to walk out for the last time. Most of my colleagues didnt even know I had resigned because I didnt tell them. The one or two I had taken into my confidence I swore to secrecy until after I had left. I didnt want a "leaving do" or all that fuss and sentimentality.

Thanks all, such lovely comments and knowing that you've felt the same as me and you still went ahead with the new one and it all worked out for you!

I start tomorrow. I am spiralling tonight! What on earth is wrong with me!

Good luck.
Well done for starting a new job.
Remember that some people stay in a job for far too long and are at risk of becoming institutionalised and resistant to any type of change.
Not good 😘

I love your username for my situation 🤣
I have definitely become too comfortable in the job I've just left, and it could be why I'm not excited - at all!
Plus, the job is more, and a completely different one to what I've been doing!
Fingers crossed it goes well!

I've cried when I've left most jobs. But equally, all of those moves were good for my development and my career.

It's a sign that you valued the job and the people you worked with. Not necessarily a sign that it's a bad thing to move on.

Good luck tomorrow OP

Nerves are just your body preparing to face a challenge successfully. It's basically the same physiological response as excitement. It can help to embrace it as something positive that is going to fuel your success rather than trying to push it away.

It'd be more concerning if you weren't nervous! You'll be fine.