to ask you to kindly buck me up and for your New Year tips (New Year Blues)?

[NewYearNewWay]

I've had a horrible few years. Worst things possible serious family illnesses, several deaths, loss of best friend - you name it. I've struggled through the last year carrying grief but was really looking forward to the new year as a clean sheet.

Inexplicably (I am alone for NYE) I suddenly feel very down and have serious blues. What was feeling like a big chance to turn a corner and move forward into the future, now feels just like a black hole with no one I love there.

Feeling so sad and lonely, I thought I'd post here asking for help with two things please

one is can you cheer me up with anything at all - a joke, a recommendation for a funny film or a comedy programme (Friends my usual go to has departed Netflix 😞), a funny book, a stupid story of something that happened to you that is funny.

the other is can you give me your New Year fresh start/clean slate tips to make it a better year? The only thing I've currently got is to not drink alcohol for a bit but even the thought of that makes me sad - I do like a nice chilled glass of Chablis. :(. I was thinking of doing a course of something interesting but lacking interest in anything right now. Motivation low. Sadness high.

I don’t have any words of comfort, I’m sorry. But if you love Friends and like to read, try the book Lenny Marks Gets Away With Murder by Kerryn Mayne. It’s probably not published in the UK, but if you have a Kindle or other e-reader you’ll be able to get a copy. Lenny is a big Friends fan and I found myself enjoying the book despite myself.

Happy New Year, and I hope you feel better soon.

I hope you feel cheerier soon, OP.

Here's my favourite joke (sorry for the toilet humour!):
What's brown and sits on the piano stool...??

Beethoven's last movement!

I was feeling really glum over Christmas , as my mum is really ill in hospital. I watched some old episodes of Mr Bean (one about Christmas and one about New Year's Eve), and they really made me chuckle and cheered me up! I know it's not everyone's taste, but I loved Mr Bean when I was little, so it was comforting. My dad and I also watched a few old episodes of Would I Lie To You one evening after visiting my mum, and they made us both laugh a lot.

I too have had several really shitty years. I went into 2025 hoping for a calm and quiet year, and unfortunately it’s been anything but . There is a poem by Roger Robinson called “A Portable Paradise,” which I always read to myself when things feel hard and hopeless. It gives me comfort and peace and helps me feel a bit more resilient.

A friend of mine keeps a jar and a pile of post its and writes one happy or good thing that’s happened that day and puts it in the jar. He then opens it at the end of the year and reads them all. There is always good even when times are hard, and I’ve noticed throughout my life for the most part people are kind at heart and want to help. Help sometimes presents itself in unexpected ways.

Wishing you all the best for the year ahead.

Sometimes it’s better to lean into it: mild wallow tonight with a glass of whatever helps BUT crucially an early night and a plan for tomorrow. A morning walk / run feeling smug for feeling healthy? Clean the house for a reset? Plan a holiday?

If you have a diary or calendar, or if not a notebook you can list the 2026 months and dates in. Add any commitments you have - hair, dentist, work, see a friend, whatever - then see whare the spaces are.

If you never do anything on a Sunday afternoon, consider what you might do ( you don't need to be mad keen on the idea) - go for walk, read a chapter of a book, plant some seeds, phone 2 people, declutter a kitchen drawer. It doesn’t really matter what it is - just commit to doing it and see how you feel afterwards. And then look to fill other spaces in your week with other activities. Keep it small and just do something. And be kind to yourself.

Identity Thief is a great funny film (Jason Bateman and Melissa McCartney), it will be on either Netflix or Amazon.

Motherland is a fab and funny series too.

I too need to find motivation for tomorrow so am going to put a razor in the shower to de fuzz myself and get back on track with putting a scoop of protein powder in my water bottle (def gave me energy).

to everyone feeling the same way, I'm there with you and thank you for taking the time to reply to me.

@OMarina - the jar of a nice thing a day is a lovely idea. I think my jar for this year had I done that would be very empty though.

@Showmethedrugs yes maybe a wallow is the answer rather than feeling sad.

It is terrible that I did smile a bit at that Beethoven's last movement joke?

Well then. I was in a psychiatric unit January this year and 6 weeks of the summer before that. I currently do voluntary work. Looking for a part time job. I’m just taking one day at a time as I’m on medication too. The Holdovers and Bridget Jones Mad About the Boy are two feel great films. Consider reading Jordan B Peterson 12 Rules For Life. He’s a professor of psychology.

If you like Motherland try AMANDALAND. Two Doors Down is also very funny.

I also have the NYE blues, been a bit of a miserable Christmas and I am on my own tonight. I have been for a nice walk in the winter sunshine, have bought a nice meal for myself this evening and am going to watch some Taskmaster with a large glass of Baileys. Tomorrow, I am going to get a grip, go for a run and make some holiday plans for 2026!

My favourite comedy on Netflix is Arrested Development. Highly recommend.

Nothing wrong with having a bit of a wallow on NYE though! My year has been good but only because I left a toxic job near the start, so this time last year I was cripplingly miserable.

It's ok - and healthy - to grieve but you do also need to do some positive things to lift yourself. So the 'nice thing in a jar' idea is brilliant, and it'll help you look back and identify the things that you enjoy.
My four favourite comedies:
The Wedding Date
Hot Fuzz
Keeping Mum

and About Time but there's one bit that always makes me cry so you might prefer to avoid that one!

What do you call a man with a rabbit up his bum?

Warren!

You're not alone @NewYearNewWay . We're all thinking of you now and sending love and a happy new year to you.

I've just spent a lovely hour starting a journal for next year. Writing down all the good things I'm hoping to do and making plans for my garden, crafting and days out, things to learn about and positive things I can do for my health. (Brilliant on laying off the booze by the way - you've inspired me).

Have you seen Ghosts (the UK version) It never fails to lift my spirits (excuse the crap pun), makes me roar with laughter and it even has one episode that references Friends. Not at all spooky, really heartwarming and on iPlayer.

There's a Leonard Cohen lyric someone mentioned to me today that really resonated especially at this time of year, when there's pressure to have a picture-perfect happy life surrounded by friends and family. It makes me think of finding hope in things that are broken.

"Ring the bells that still can ring
Forget your perfect offering
There is a crack, a crack in everything
That's how the light gets in"

For TV programmes with some humour I like watching Friday Night Dinner or, going back quite a few years into my retro TV archive, Green Wing and The IT Crowd.

I hope you feel better soon OP.

I completely empathise, same for me, too many losses, have been struggling too. There's no magic advice or i would happily take it myself.

For me, I know I've got to get up, work, look after DC, help family members, so many responsibilities. What I've done is be honest and I just say I need decompression time, go to my room and listen to some self hypnosis, or go for a walk. I also try to take things more slowly as rushing around makes me more stressed, eg think do I really need to do that now? Xx

If you're thinking about new year's resolutions, this article resonated hugely with me.
https://www.thenerve.news/p/philippa-perry-new-year-resolutions-gym-membership-self-improvement
You had a shit year, be kind to yourself. Changes can be gentle and natural, not puritanical.

I find NYE hard, it's when I get most homesick - NYE should be in the warm, with a bbq!

I find looking ahead, deciding what I want to do better, or achieve in the NY helps.

Also, not watching whatever crap those sadistic arseholes at the BBC put on TV, I've never forgiven them for putting Titanic on for NYE, in 2000, our first NYE from NZ. THE TITANIC!

Also, don't drink from midnight NZ time (which is 11am our time) to midnight UK time. . .

May the last of this year be kind to you, OP, and next year so much more happier and rewarding for you.

Sounds like you need to take good care of yourself after a tough few years. Lots of asking “what do I need right now?” and letting yourself have it guilt-free, wether that’s a day in bed, watching films you loved as a child, trying something new, healthy food or a big chocolate cake.

Thank you for posting this OP. Also on my own tonight and feeling this way too. 🤗It’s cheered me up to read the replies. So many lovely ideas.

Wishing us all a happy and healthy 2026.

Glad it was some help to you @Superwomanwantsnewjob

The new year has turned out to be a slow slide into more deeper shade of blue. It's freezing cold, I got two work rejections, and not drinking wine is making me even more miserable. Sounds dumb but it is a real pleasure. I'm also trying to be a bit healthy with my eating which is also making me miserable. I want some sugar high.

I should be grateful for the many things I have and have had but thinking that isn't helping either.

It's only been 3 days but I feel like this year sucks already. 😢

Trying not to drink G&T or wine too, which is a weekend treat on a Saturday night. 😅

Made myself an old style milk and cocoa with Bournville and am enjoying it with a biscuit while watching a film. Feels like a treat. 🤗